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emotional and not sure I'm justified

(7 Posts)
ineedaname Tue 26-Jul-11 23:35:25

In short, my parents are seoarated, and my sister and brother are just totally clingy with my mother, and she with them. They are grown up, I hasten to add!
Anyway, I'm the only one who voluntarily does stuff with my Dad, sees him regularly etc, despite the fact that I am the only one with Dcs. My Dad had an accident today, serious enough to warrant him being air lifted to hospital. His injuries are unconfirmed, and I feel he should not have been sent home, but that's a whole new post. Anyway, my bro is taking him back to hospital in the morning for further Xrays and tests, which is reasonable as he has the physical strength to help him (he can't stand / walk). Now it turns out my sister has decided to go as well to accompany him and Dad's GF. I feel really pushed out and excluded, as I am the one who does everything for him, and I know I will have to do everything for however long he is laid up. They will just swan off and do what the hell they like. AIBU to feel hurt and pushed out?

worraliberty Tue 26-Jul-11 23:37:32

Oh I thought you were going to say you're upset because your brother and sister don't want to visit him or they don't care?

Can you not go with them as a family to show your support?

vegetariandumpling Tue 26-Jul-11 23:40:14

Sorry to hear about your dad sad

I think yabu but I can see where you're coming from...you spend time with your dad all the time, are very close, work hard at maintaining the relationship etc while your db and dsis just swan in when there's an emergency. However, I'm sure you're dad appreciates what you do and hopefully this will kick your db and dsis up the arse into gear and they'll start putting in more effort smile

Sharney Tue 26-Jul-11 23:40:20

You'd be a lot more upset if they didn't do anything and you had to deal with this and your dc's. Be glad they're taking care of him. Maybe it's a wake-up call for them.

izzywhizzyletsgetbusy Tue 26-Jul-11 23:46:10

So far, I've counted 4 in the car/transport to hospital and that sounds more than enough given that your pa may need extra room to make himself comfortable.

The motley crew may be planning to accompany your pa on the journey, but that's no reason why you shouldn't be waiting at the hospital for his arrival and ask pertinent questions about his aftercare if he isn't admitted to a ward.

ineedaname Tue 26-Jul-11 23:52:01

I can't get there as don't have my own transport tomorrow. It isn't a wake up call, they always do this. They swan in and swan out. Just to make it look good for appearance's sake it seems. They won't actually help for the duration, despite the fact I have DCs and they don't. They will do the next couple of days and then go back to their lives whilst I pick up the pieces behind them. That's why it irks. He is v clumsy and accident prone, and I never mind helping him but I do feel very hurt by their behaviour. They bitch about him all the time, avoid his calls and treat him like shit, until they need to be seen as dutiful Dcs sad

ineedaname Tue 26-Jul-11 23:54:59

The other thing I didn;t explain properly is that he shouldn't have been sent home, yet they enabled that; having told me I may as well go hojme as there were too many people there. I am more likely to ask questions and check that he is getting the treatment he should, and not being sent home to make the bed shortage less angry

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