scared about DS starting school after reading various MN threads(9 Posts)
I was looking forward to my DS starting primary school in sept but now concerned as this is what I have learnt from MN:
1. Alpha mums playground mafia to negotiate - fills me with horror after reading the 'boobs out' mum thread.
2. I might be judged if dressed smart on a work day or slobby on a day off.
3. Judged again if i occasionally drive down to school as i only live 20 mins walk away .
4. Birthday parties, will DS be invited to any? How will i know not to accidently leave anyone out of his birthday invites - do you get a class list?
5. Corrupt governers might steal well-meaning, expensive donations.
6. School admin staff might block my view in the Christmas play.
AIBU to be worried, do you have any advice to help me prepare? By the way my son is an only child and i am helicopter parent by nature, can't stop myself!
Soundslike you are more afraid of your own expereince than your sons.
Message withdrawn at poster's request.
Buy a flak jacket with the school logo on it - that should cover 1&2
YANBU... be conscious of all these phenomenon. By far the best preparation is to create a persona for yourself and your family & then live it. I've gone for something between 'Narnia Ice Queen' and 'Lily Savage' casting my DS in the role of Pugsley. The mum brigade are too scared to diss me in the playground and governers know better than to ask me for any kind of donation. Admin staff give me admiring winks and save front seats for me at plays. Pugsley invitations eagerly snapped up by kids daring each other visit our house and live to tell the tale..... Sorted.
1. Become an Alpha Mum immediately, then others will have to negotiate you.
2. Do the school run in your pyjamas, then go home and get changed.
3. Purchase a helicopter and land on the football field
4. Make a cake, send it in for whole class to eat on school day and tell DS that was his party
5. Don't donate
6. You're an alpha mummy. No one would dare.
Embrace the judginess - it will get you sooner or later. Grow a thick skin - and if you work out how to do that, do let me know. Actually, with DC1 I had all of these agonies and still do (he is moderately popular but a natural born worrier) but DC2 was born to be an alpha parent and has taken charge herself (clearly writing me off as useless) - watching her work the field at DC1's sports day was a masterclass in small talk and networking (she's 4, BTW)
(moment of sensibleness - No. 4 is the easy one - yes you can ask for a class list - but you will still be wrong in someone's eyes no matter what you do )
I really wouldn't worry.
1.Alpha mums playground mafia to negotiate -there is no such thing- unless you give them that position.(except possibly in their own mind)
2. I might be judged if dressed smart on a work day or slobby on a day off-most people are not inthe least bothered.
3. Judged again if i occasionally drive down to school as i only live 20 mins walk away-most people do .
4. Birthday parties, will DS be invited to any? How will i know not to accidently leave anyone out of his birthday invites - do you get a class list? Friends will invite him, help him make friends by inviting them home. Have small parties and ask him who he wants. If people are mad enough to have whole class ones you do not have to invite back and get sucked in.
5. Corrupt governers might steal well-meaning, expensive donations-governors tend to be well meaning, they do massive amounts of paper work as volunteers.
6. School admin staff might block my view in the Christmas play-sitting on small chairs in a hall you don't get much of a view anyway.
Take anything that you read on MN with a huge pinch of salt-which I assume that you already do from OP.
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