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AIBU?

To think it isn't funny to pretend you have forgotten to pick a child up at 11pm and to thus abandon my principles and buy dd a mobile

20 replies

elphabadefiesgravity · 25/07/2011 23:11

Dd is 9. She has been in a dance show. On the opening night a family member was going to watch so I asked if they would pick her up from the stage door afterwards and bring her home to save me going out late at night.

The show was due to finish at 10pm. However at 10.45pm she still wasn't home. We texted to say what time did you leave and what time will dd be home. We got a text back to say we havn't picked her up - should we have?

So we phoned in a panic saying please tell me you are joking - you have got dd havn't you - no we havnt, why, should we have picked her up was the reply.

So we slammed the phone down and dh ran to the car whilst I ran to the pc to see if I could find the mobile number of the dance teacher. We knew she would be OK in that she would be with someone at the theatre but panic set in - she would be upset, think no-one was coming - teacher would be cross etc etc.

Then the phone rang and it was them - laughing hysterically saying of course we were joking - we have got her. They said we were being stupid for thinking they hadn't got her. I said it wasn't funny - not at that time of night. Dh could have had an accident trying to race to the theatre.

The next day we bought dd PAYG mobile to take to the theatre so we could contact her directly. My parents picked her up for us the next night and said it was useful becasue the show did run over and it took time to get the kids signed out. She texted them when she reached the stage door so they didn't have to wait half an hour in the rain.

AIBU unreasonable to have got her a phoneat such a young age. I really didn;t want to and she has been a bit silly texting her friends so got it confiscated at the weekend.

OP posts:

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DingDongMerrilyOutOfSeason · 25/07/2011 23:15

YANBU to have got DD a phone for occasions such as this, she does not need to carry it with her everywhere.

You are very unfortunate to have relatives like this though.

BoysAreLikeDogs · 25/07/2011 23:15

fuckers

can you slam their collective fingers in a car door or summat

DingDongMerrilyOutOfSeason · 25/07/2011 23:16

Sorry, meant to say, just call it the 'spare house mobile' and only let her take it when she will be out late waiting for you. She doesn't need to have it as 'hers' if you don't think she is ready for one yet.

reelingintheyears · 25/07/2011 23:17

Yeah...Ha fucking Ha...

Tell them to fuck off.

And then slam their fingers in a car door.

hiddenhome · 25/07/2011 23:17

Arrange to have their car towed away during the night then see how much they laugh in the morning

worraliberty · 25/07/2011 23:17

They were total tossers

But what's the problem with a kid having a mobile phone?

You can pick a basic one up virtually free nowdays and they're a god send in situations like that...or even if they're on a sleepover at a friend's house.

superparty · 25/07/2011 23:18

No YANBU but i think your relatives are a little unhinged thinking that saying that would be in any way funny :/

my 9 yr old got a mobile for christmas, we put £10 per month on it, and she gets so many minutes and 300 texts, so she can silly texts her friends, but more importantly we can ring her and her sister 8yrs to check where they are and if they are ok, and to tell them when to come home.

sometimes she has it on silent so doesn't hear it and then we go on a child goose chase, they are then grounded for the next evening. hth x

purplepidjin · 25/07/2011 23:21

What a bunch of utter knobends - DP and I are in total agreement that you should, if possible, fuck them the fuck off, then fuck them from a distance. There are no possible circumstances where that could be anything other than the unfunniest occurence in Dullsville, Dullifornia.

YANBU for getting your DD a mobile, it will ensure her safety and your peace of mind!

MJHASLEFTTHEBUILDING · 25/07/2011 23:22

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

elphabadefiesgravity · 25/07/2011 23:32

I was trying to be discrete but the relatives were actually the in laws.

I found it really really hard to speak to them when they got back - but had to remain calm for dd's sake (she was tired and excited due to show)

She was texting her friends during the show in the dressing room (they are put in teams and have to stay in their groups woth chaperones so were sending silly messages across the room. I checked her in box and sent messages afterwards,

Think she has learnt her lesson.

Hope the in laws have learnt theirs.

OP posts:

AlmightyCitrus · 25/07/2011 23:56

Your In-laws are twats.

Both my DD's got a mobile phone at 9, mainly because they partake in a couple of activities with flexible finishing times, so rather than be hanging round waiting for them, they can ring when they need collecting. Conditions were, that they didn't spend a fortune texting friends, and so far they've been fairly sensible about it.

Blindcavesalamander · 26/07/2011 00:07

Your inlaws are totally insensitive. YANBU at all. I'm glad you survived the fright. We didn't want to get our 10 yr old DD a mobile phone either, until she started secondary school, because of the scares about brain tumours, with young growing brains supposedly more susceptible
www.independent.co.uk/news/science/mobile-phone-use-raises-childrens-risk-of-brain-cancer-fivefold-937005.html
.. whethter it's true or not it put me off. However, whe DD started playing out on her own with friends, riding off on their bikes etc. we wanted to be able to contact her and for us to let her know where she was and call in at specified times for peace of mind. So we bought one for her, just a cheapie ... but it seems to use up credits even when it's not been touched!!! It's Vodaphone and is incredibly expensive to use. We are hoping texting is less of a risk that phone calls as it's what she mostly does. Sometimes I think your origional ideas change as your child grows and situations develop and you have to adapt to new priorities.
Your inlaws were lucky you didn't call the police!!

purplepidjin · 26/07/2011 00:13

In-laws? FFS!

Can you make it clear that they won't be having sole charge of your dc's for the foreseeable future? I'm guessing that completely cutting them out of your lives would be more hassle than it's worth

ShoutyHamster · 26/07/2011 00:16

Wow, it's the boiled mince and lumpy mattress option for them when it comes to the care home, eh?

Frostiness for some time to come I imagine - twats!

Spuddybean · 26/07/2011 00:20

what's that all about? hilarious child abandonment japes!? can't wait for the encore.

who thinks that's funny? apart from them i mean. er, no one!

Inertia · 26/07/2011 00:31

Your in-laws have behaved despicably- what a horrible thing to do. I think they need to grow up, TBQH. I'd be giving them a very wide berth for a while.

The phone could be something you keep and let your DD have when she needs it for events such as this. You can also set up the phone so that she can only dial preset numbers and emergency services.

mybrainsthinkingfuckyou · 26/07/2011 00:50

My 9 year old has a pay as you go for emergencies and jolly useful it is too.
Are you sure they weren't just responding to the curtness of your original text seeing as they were doing you the favour or the perceived stupidity of questioning whether they had her. My DH hates questions like that particularly if they are blindingly obvious or imply incompetence/stupidity.

example - you will drive safely won't you? will always merit No I intend driving into a tree at 60 mph what do you think?
Have you got the keys? No - pause - have you? - pause - course I've got them.

So if I said You did get DC didn't you? He would possibly say with poker face No didn't you? to see if he could get me for a few moments as I am Queen Gullible. BUT this would always be verbal face to face and rarely kept going for a while NEVER texted and not late at night.

But why didn't you just give em a quick call at the time? a jolly Ooh Is she late out? Sorry you're having to wait/thanks so much for doing this Are you far away? Shall i put the kettle on? With a pleasant tone and a bit of gratitude that a) they were supporting her b) they were bringing her back

maybe they felt like a taxi or hate texting or anything 'modern'!

Have they got previous for wind-ups? How hopping mad is/was your DH?

thursday · 26/07/2011 00:54

what nobtastic inlaws! unbelievable. YANBU to have a spare mobile that she can use when the need is there. obviously she doesnt need to them have it permanently on her.

ninedragons · 26/07/2011 01:13

Payback time for you!

Next time they're staying with you, wait until Granny goes for a bath, then run in and drop a hairdryer into the bath (not plugged in, obviously).

Then stand around going HA HA HA, of COURSE it wasn't plugged in. But it will be next time if you ever pull a joke like that again, lady.

AlfalfaMum · 26/07/2011 01:21

They were being arseholes, for sure, but it does sound like your DD needs a mobile for those situations anyway. It doesn't mean she needs to have possession of it every day ;-)

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