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Is this quite normal?

(27 Posts)
elisadoeslittle Mon 25-Jul-11 15:55:41

Id like to know if this is a common place thing to do.

DN is moving in with MIL for the next month or so while his new brother/sister is born. The baby is due in 3 weeks time.

Im shock but perhaps this is normal.

cheesesarnie Mon 25-Jul-11 15:56:49

i think thats a really bad idea!how old is dn?

OldLadyKnowsNothing Mon 25-Jul-11 15:56:52

My DSis and I were sent away to our grandmother's for about a month when our DB was being born, so it's not a one-off.

MrsVidic Mon 25-Jul-11 15:58:07

I think it depends on age of dn- my dd, 2 will be carrying on as much as normal when this dc is born. Each to his own

elisadoeslittle Mon 25-Jul-11 16:00:16

Hes 18mo. I feel really sorry for him. When my brother was born I was sent away for just 3 days and my mum tells me I was so distraught I stopped walking. shock I was 2 and a half.

GeneralDreedlesNurse Mon 25-Jul-11 16:02:35

Maybe it's `normal' for them? I can see why someone would do this, but also why they wouldn't - depends on age of your DN. My DS was 11 (almost 12) when i had his little sis, he was away on holiday with his dad (my exH) and came back the day after she was born for a couple of days to see her and then went off again.

Surely whatever works for their family has got to be agood thing. It may not be the thing we'd do but that only makes it different not (necessarily) wrong.

thereisalightanditnevergoesout Mon 25-Jul-11 16:02:46

My mum was sent away to live with an aunt (her brother and sister weren't though hmm) when her youngest sister was born - but that was about 50 years ago.

I can't say I've heard many people opting for this in recent years.

lorelilee Mon 25-Jul-11 16:02:53

Sorry, but this fills me with horror. The poor wee mite will think that her parents are not interested in her now that they have a new baby. I really think it will cause her major issues. This is not based on any evidence, just my inherent fear of being thought of as less than special.

bubblesincoffee Mon 25-Jul-11 16:04:54

I think it would be an awful thing to do, but understandable if there are likely to be other issues surrounding the birth - of which there could be many.

LunaticFringe Mon 25-Jul-11 16:06:31

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

upahill Mon 25-Jul-11 16:06:48

What a horrible (IMO) idea!
The little one should be part of the family ready to greet the new member of the family I think.

diddl Mon 25-Jul-11 16:07:29

Blimey-sounds really old fashioned to me!

Why is he going so soon?

What if baby is late?

My sister is in her 50s & dad reluctantly left her with his MIL for a couple of days as both mum & I were ill in hospital & if he wasn´t at work, he was at the hospital.

FuzzpigFourFiveSix Mon 25-Jul-11 16:08:05

That's really sad, he could get really distressed. But each to their own. Is there a health problem with baby or mother that maybe means they need more space?

DD was 2.2 when DS was born and the day he was born was the first time I was away from her for a whole day. Haven't done it since, she's 4.1 <clingy mum emoticon>

stillstanding Mon 25-Jul-11 16:08:20

Not the way I roll tbh but there could be good reasons for this ...

EuphemiaMcGonagall Mon 25-Jul-11 16:10:40

My dad and I stayed with my grannie for a couple of weeks when DB was born, but mainly because he was very poorly and in an incubator. I think my dad wanted me to have the routine of school, and to be able to spend time at the hospital without worrying about my mealtimes, etc.

Got spoiled rotten by Grannie. grin

valiumredhead Mon 25-Jul-11 16:11:34

Well sometimes this situation happens because mum has to stay in hospital longer than normal/dad can;t get time off work etc. If handled sensibly I am sure it'll be fine.

revolutionscoop Mon 25-Jul-11 16:25:29

Is there a reasoning/explanation being given for this?

diddl Mon 25-Jul-11 16:29:18

I´m not sure if it´s "normal", but if there´s noone nearby & if MIL isn´t willing to go to them, and depending on distance, I can see how it has come about tbh.

Mixitnow Mon 25-Jul-11 16:37:06

For a month or so? This is way too long IMO especially at that age! My ds's 16 and 8 spent three weeks at my mums when their new brother was born but this was because I spent three weeks in hospital, by the end even the 16 year old couldn't wait to come home! Who knows what such a young child will think to being apart from it's parents for that long! can understand a few days maybe but a month or so is too much

vividgingerchilli Mon 25-Jul-11 16:38:58

I think it'd be better for the MIL to stay with the family instead.

superjobee Mon 25-Jul-11 16:43:52

not something that will happen in my household i feel really sorry for your DN sad

FuzzpigFourFiveSix Mon 25-Jul-11 17:18:04

Wow - just reread op and saw it's about a month. I'd misread it as a week before - a month, wow. sad

diddl Mon 25-Jul-11 17:22:43

A month does seem a long time, doesn´t ?

I missed my PFB when I went into hospital to have my second.

I went in at 1 in the afternoon & PFB came in the next morning-that was long enough!

griphook Mon 25-Jul-11 17:25:27

my dad was sent away when his sister was born, can babck with a stutter. the stutter went away a few months after he went home. tis very sad

alowVera Mon 25-Jul-11 17:39:11

IMO I feel that this is a surefire way to make DN feel replaced.

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