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to ask my neighbours to remove this plant?

(39 Posts)
AKMD Mon 25-Jul-11 15:43:12

My neighbours have a huge lilly which has just come into bloom. It's in their back garden right next to the shared path to our garages. Last night I had to go backwards and forwards unpacking the car from a weekend away and afterwards was wheezing so badly that I had to have the maximum 6 puffs of my inhaler (I have asthma) before my breathing was anywhere near udner control. If that hadn't worked, the next step would have been a 999 call for an ambulance and a hospital trip. Fast-forward to today... I've just opened the windows at the back of my house and I'm already wheezing! AIBU to nicely ask my neighbours if they could take the plant inside or get rid of it? I would get them a nice non-killer replacement plant if that would help.

LaurieFairyCake Mon 25-Jul-11 15:44:48

yabu - but I have lots of sympathy for you

<gilds the lily> grin

Kladdkaka Mon 25-Jul-11 15:45:19

You could ask. We've just taken down 2 full grown moster trees from our garden because the neighbours asked very nicely.

Kladdkaka Mon 25-Jul-11 15:46:16

monster trees that is. Doh!

HazeltheMcWitch Mon 25-Jul-11 15:48:22

Why not ask?

As long as you do it REALLY politely as say you know that you are asking a HUGE favour, they of course are under no obligation, but... (explain issue).

And if they do - fab, and buy them another plant and some wine/chocs etc as a thanks and for their trouble.

But if they decline - well, you can't grump nor hold it against them.

If they were wheezing at one of your plants, you'd want to do something about it, wouldn't you?

Poor you, by the way.

ICantFindAFreeNickName Mon 25-Jul-11 15:48:59

Poor you. Is it in a pot, if so they should be able to move it quite easily. If you ask nicely & are even offering to buy them a replacement plant then YANBU.

OhYouBadBadKitten Mon 25-Jul-11 15:49:32

yanbu, you can only ask and it is their right to say no (which would be horrid of them)

MyMamaToldMe Mon 25-Jul-11 15:50:01

I totally sympathise with you as a fellow asthma sufferer. Lillies also really affect me - so to me YANBU, and I don't see the harm in asking nicely!

DogsBestFriend Mon 25-Jul-11 15:52:48

Can one plant in the open air really cause so much trouble? Blimey!

I knew of course that a large amount of pollen is a nightmare for asthma and hayfever sufferers and that, say, it would be worse for them where I live, surrounded by fields, than in the city but I didn't think that just one plant in isolation and not in an enclosed space could be that bad.

I want to say YABU as lilies are my favourite flower and scent but I know you're not really. grin

AKMD Mon 25-Jul-11 15:54:46

It is in a pot [starts to feel hopeful]. They also have a cat and DH reckons lillies are toxic to cats. He is arguing strongly in favour of the lilly as the cat is being a bit of a pain in our vegetable patch shock

Ormirian Mon 25-Jul-11 15:54:52

I'd be gutted if a plant I really liked (and I really like lilies) had to be cut back just as it was flowering. I guess I;d feel obliged if your athsma is that bad but I'd probably be really pissed off. Could you take some anti-histamines? It will only be in flower for a week or so.

BTW I am an athsma-suffered but thankfully never had that severe a reaction to a single plant

Wormshuffler Mon 25-Jul-11 15:55:25

I wouldn't move a plant for that reason, sorry, it will only be in flower a couple of weeks. I would be prepared to clip it where it comes over your side though so you wernt having to touch it, that is fair enough, and actually legally you could chop any that comes over your boundary yourself.

DogsBestFriend Mon 25-Jul-11 15:56:25

Lilies can be toxic to cats. I only hope that your DH is joking.

Pootles2010 Mon 25-Jul-11 15:59:08

How many flowers does it have on it? I believe florists often snip the stamens out of lily flowers to prevent staining, I assume this would get rid of the pollen and thus your problem, without getting rid of the flowers themselves?

ChristinedePizan Mon 25-Jul-11 16:02:01

I am a very keen gardener and if one of my plants was causing my neighbour to have a near asthma attack I would be very happy to move it, even if it weren't in a pot

Yes lilies aren't great for cats but most cats don't eat them grin

jenniec79 Mon 25-Jul-11 16:05:32

YANBU to ask, you would be U to insist. Talk to them.

I'm not asthmatic, but I do get sniffly around lillies (shame cos I love them) so I can see how they can affect you so badly.

ouryve Mon 25-Jul-11 16:05:36

If I was your neighbour and you asked me nicely, I would move the plant for you. Honeysuckle and lilac have my eyes and nose streaming to the point that I feel really ill and can't do anything - I think people who don't suffer from allergies sometimes find it hard to appreciate just how uncomfortable (and even dangerous for some people) they are.

AKMD Mon 25-Jul-11 16:05:45

DogsBestFriend he does get cross with the local cats but he wouldn't seriously wish them dead. The softy stopped his car and physically moved a cat that refused to budge from the middle of the access road to the garage a few weeks ago smile

It has 10 flowers that I can count. Stripping the stamens might well help, good thinking. I do take antihistamines and lillies don't usually affect me too badly - DH sometimes buys them to have in the house and I've never had a problem before.

If the situations were reversed, I would certainly move the plant for my neighbour.

Wormshuffler Mon 25-Jul-11 16:09:51

Pootles has a good point there, I pull the pollen peices out myself on cut lillies to prevent staining, if you get them just as the flower is opening before they are powdery that would illiminate the problem.

GreenEyesandHam Mon 25-Jul-11 16:10:24

I love my garden, but I wouldn't hesitate to move something that was bothering a neighbour in this way.

Ormirian Mon 25-Jul-11 16:12:18

COuld they move the plant to the other side of the garden?

valiumredhead Mon 25-Jul-11 16:14:41

Lilies only last 5 mins, it'll be dead before you know it!

InFlames Mon 25-Jul-11 16:16:07

Agree with the 'ask nicely, buy thank
You present'. Maybe see asthma nurse for antihistamine if they really really won't move it?

blackeyedsusan Mon 25-Jul-11 16:16:55

you could ask them to remove the stamens...

Ephiny Mon 25-Jul-11 16:20:48

Are you sure it was the lily that caused your asthma attack, and it wasn't just a coincidence? Not suggesting you go and stand next to it again to check! Just wondering as you said you'd been ok previously with lilies in the house, and it does sound a bit alarming that one plant in next door's garden could cause such a bad reaction to someone just walking past!

If you think it is, then YANBU to explain to the neighbour and ask politely if there's anything they can do. If it was my garden, I'd be willing to move it in that situation - asthma is a serious thing so it's more than a minor annoyance to you.

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