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name & shame - have I done wrong?

(89 Posts)
redrosette Sun 24-Jul-11 14:43:04

Okay so I used a local hairdresser who was very rude and I'd never use again. I mentioned on facebook and twitter that I'd had a bad experience and that I'd PM the name to any of my friends who wanted it.

So I sent the name to several people via PM. It wasn't public at any time, however said hairdresser has now contacted me threatening legal action for slander!

I didn't put anything publicly, only through PM to who I thought were friends, so I thought that wouldn't be illegal, its called PRIVATE message for a reason, right? Plus, my comments & experiences were 100% genuine.

This woman threatens legal action to everyone I'm told, and sends lawyers letters to everyone but nothing further happens, she seems to like causing trouble, however I'd hate to have to fork out for lawyers letters back and forth.

Thoughts welcome.

manticlimactic Sun 24-Jul-11 14:45:06

She'd have to prove what you said wasn't true. Let her go for it if she has form for being lawyer happy.

Did you find out who blabbed?

LadyThumb Sun 24-Jul-11 14:46:32

When will people realise that NOTHING is private any more?

Earlybird Sun 24-Jul-11 14:52:36

In principal, I don't understand the need to POST on Facebook and Twitter about something like this. Why not just have a moan to your friends? Do people not speak to each other any more?

Doesn't help with your query, I know......

How has the hairdresser got in touch with you? In your shoes, I'd simply ignore. Responding will drag things out. And whatever you do, DON'T POST about her getting in touch.

catgirl1976 Sun 24-Jul-11 14:55:28

Ignore her. She sounds unpleasant and strange and as mantic says the burden is on her to prove what you said was not true. Even if she could it is unlikely to be worth her pursuing as it will be expensive for her. Ignore her and don't put things like that into writing unless they are a direct complaint to the person involved.

redrosette Sun 24-Jul-11 14:55:28

haven't responded and I wont. yes she got in touch with me, how she got my details I dont know and I have no idea who blabbed.

BooBooGlass Sun 24-Jul-11 14:55:38

I have an acquaintance who sent a private message on FB to a few friends about her ex boyfriend, basically alleging he used to abuse her. She was visited by the police the next morning and slapped with a harassment order shock. So yes, be very very careful what you send to people.

Punkatheart Sun 24-Jul-11 14:56:06

Firstly, slander is spoken - libel is written. You have also to ask yourself how she discovered, if this was only done in private messaging. But as you said, she threatens everyone - she clearly has some problems, both with her work and her personaility.

AgentZigzag Sun 24-Jul-11 15:00:54

How would this be different from an online review of a product/business?

People write all sorts of negative stuff about holiday resorts etc, and in this situation the OP didn't even name the company.

Tiredmumno1 Sun 24-Jul-11 15:04:52

Its not slander its the truth

TheMonster Sun 24-Jul-11 15:06:07

Yes you did wrong.

AgentZigzag Sun 24-Jul-11 15:06:49

But why Eeyore?

Mitmoo Sun 24-Jul-11 15:08:29

The woman is a bit stupid really, if you showed that she had threatened to sue you because you didn't like her manner, she'd lose whatever customer she relies on. No one would go in there.

I think you are fine so long as you have told the truth about her.

TheMonster Sun 24-Jul-11 15:08:54

Did you complain to her and give her a chance to apologise or explain anything?

robingood19 Sun 24-Jul-11 15:11:20


AgentZigzag Sun 24-Jul-11 15:12:17

Random loud post there robingood grin

amothersplaceisinthewrong Sun 24-Jul-11 15:12:35

I think in this situation I would heed my grandmothers saying, "a still tongue in a wise head". Say no more, just blank her, she will go away.

redrosette Sun 24-Jul-11 15:12:43

Yes I complained to her. She didn't apologise or anything. She seems to not like other people hearing about it though, even if her name or company wasn't made public.

I'm having legal issues with someone else, an entirely different matter, but I dont need any more legal stuff right now, I'm paying my lawyer enough!

MsZ Sun 24-Jul-11 15:13:47

Wow sounds like lots of people don't like her if she has to threaten legal action so often lol

Esta3GG Sun 24-Jul-11 15:14:07

TripAdvisor has been dealing with this issue hasn't it - loads of companies threatening legal action. The people in question were given a right to reply which seemed fair.

It is a grey area all of this - I think organising a mini social network campaign to name and shame is a bit off and you'd be hearing from my solicitor too if you did it to me. She may be a twat but she has a business to protect and she is firing a warning shot across your bows.

Simply moaning to your friends in the pub is another kettle of fish - but you didn't do that did you?

What if you'd printed out some leaflets saying THIS WOMAN MAKES TOUPEES OUT OF SQUIRREL HAIR or whatever she did wrong and sent them round to anyone who wanted them - would that be ok?

Mitmoo Sun 24-Jul-11 15:14:24

red if she doesn't want people to hear about it, the last thing she should do is sue, because then you'll just go to the papers. grin It would wreck her business.

TheMonster Sun 24-Jul-11 15:14:29

I just think that you were openly and publicly inviting people to ask for her name and that is unwise.

AgentZigzag Sun 24-Jul-11 15:17:10


You've got some right weird hairdressers down your way Esta grin

AgentZigzag Sun 24-Jul-11 15:19:17

Hmmmm, more prevelant than you would have thought

Esta3GG Sun 24-Jul-11 15:20:46

Heck yeah ZigZag - they do merkins too.

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