Just found some cards in the house with 'busty blonde, great boobs, all services'

[Putup]

Name changed. I was tidying up the lounge and found two advert cards with the above on one of them and the other with words to the effect of 'lovely brunette, size 8, 34c'. I was so shocked. I found them on the floor where dh leaves his trousers when he comes in from work, folded up as if they had been in a pocket. Wtf? We are having problems right now, have been for some time, but surely not this? I am trying to think where the hell they've come from, I even asked the dc if they'd picked them up randomly.

[FabbyChic]

He probably has picked them up from a phone booth? Or a public house when drinking?

You need to ask him about them.

[LDNmummy]

Yikes!

Sorry OP. I would ask him WTF It's about.

[DogsBestFriend]

Well they didn't fly through the window all on their own...

And if you're sure that the DC haven't picked them up then I can't see any conclusion which could be drawn apart from the obvious one.

It strikes me that a man who leaves his trousers on the floor for you to pick up isn't the most respectful of guys to begin with and that, the cards aside, there must indeed be problems if that's his view of you.

Time for a frank discussion, I'd confront him, that may not be your way though.

[DogsBestFriend]

I don't know what sort of pubs you frequent, Fabby, but I've not come across any where those sort of cards are left hanging around. Phone booths, yes, but pubs?

[ChocolateTeacup]

Does he go out with his mates to clubs without you? They are often handed out to blokes, maybe completely innocent

[DogsBestFriend]

Apologies, that first bit of my last post wasn't an accusation or dig at you Fabby, I didn't mean to indicate that you do frequent pubs like that.

[Maelstrom]

Ok... before you confront him about it (so you have an idea about how to go about the ensuing conversation) take a moment to think about what you really want of this relationship. And when I say what you really want I mean what YOU really want. Once you have a bit f a clearer idea of what you want, start thinking about what you need and then, just then, what your children need and what he needs.

Then pretend nothing happened, put the children to bed, and once sleep get the attention of your husband, put the cards in front of him and let him talk.

You will be in a better position to evaluate how to tackle the problem and what to do next if you consider your position carefully before raising the issue (and can ensure that a pretending to be offended husband won't have much space to blame the problem on you). Evaluate-Listen and get the upper hand on this.

[Bloodymary]

Yes, more than likely picked up from a phone booth (in fact I think thats all phone booths are used for these days).
But sometimes six foot tall 12 year olds grown men pick them up and keep them for some sort of joke

I would show them to him and watch his reaction very carefully.

[CurlyBoy]

When my wife and I holidayed in Vegas we both had a laugh collecting the cards for the "working girls" that were left everywhere.

[GreenEyesandHam]

Laugh a minute round your gaff eh?

[Maelstrom]

I remember my parents doing the same when they first went to Las Vegas, but one thing is to laugh with your wife, and another one, collecting the cards when she is not around.

[squeakytoy]

One of my husbands mates had been to some race meeting the other day, and came back with a handful of cards like that, and was handing them out to everyone..

It could be a perfectly innocent reason why your husband had these in his possession.