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...to consider yr 4 pupil missing 15mins end of each day for this reason

(71 Posts)
NineteenForever Wed 20-Jul-11 20:26:58

DS10 due to change to comprehensive sept 2012. He has ASD and we truly hope he gets a place at a suitable school about half an hour away. He will be elligible for a taxi. DH is a SAHD and is concerned that the return of the taxi from comprehesive, when school closes at 3, will mean he is at the primary school collecting DD who will be 8 and yr 4 in sept 2012.

Would it be unreasonable for DD to miss 15 mins at end of each day so he can be at home to meet taxi? What will this do from an educational point of view?

There is an option to pay for an after school club @ £30 a week, possibly ask after school club to let DD stay for 1 hr instead of 2.5hrs.

The other concern is that if she is at the after school club, her own homework will have to be done late evening eg 6.30 when she's knackered (and this school sends home a lot of homework in yr2 alone).

Just to confirm, DS is at the primary school in a special unit and they know our family.

Comments welcome

cory Wed 20-Jul-11 20:30:13

It will probably be very disruptive for the teacher who has to stop what she is doing 15 minutes early every day to send your dd out of the clasroom, waiting until she has collected her things etc, and then have to try to get on with a few minutes of lessons once the class has settled down.

Do you know anyone who could walk your dd home from school?

BehindLockNumberNine Wed 20-Jul-11 20:33:32

I work as a TA in a primary school and we have a boy in Y4 who leaves 10 minutes early for similar reasons.

I think it is not great. Often homework has not yet been handed out; he misses the 'rounding up' and summarizing of the lesson; if the class have been given a specific time to do a piece of work in he has to stop before everyone else; if the class is in PE on the field (away from the school) we need to go and fetch him; if the class have done baking and the cakes are not yet out of the oven he misses out on taking his home; he has to get up, collect his stuff and leave the classroom whilst the teacher is reading to the rest of the class; he misses out on sweets and birthday treats handed out at the end of the day etc etc.

Now I know that lots of you will say 'surely the staff can take the time to get this child sorted and ready 10 minutes early'. But really, staff are tied up doing other things, working with other children in small groups etc and lessons are planned to the last minute, even during the last hour of the day. It is chaotic for the teacher, the class and the child itself.

Personally, I would not do it and look for an alternative instead.

Karstan Wed 20-Jul-11 20:35:06

Would it be possible for the taxi to drop your son off at your daughter's school?

Madlizzy Wed 20-Jul-11 20:37:11

My nephew who is autistic was given a key and let himself in the house. He was on his own for 20 minutes and would be found on the computer the whole time. They practiced lots and got Grandma to spy on him for the first couple of days, and he was fine.

MsCellophane Wed 20-Jul-11 20:37:48

How far away is DD school? Do you have friends that could walk her back? How much time is the overlap between DS arriving home and DD finishing school?

I don't think it's fair on your DD to miss school at all and should be avoided at all costs.

bned Wed 20-Jul-11 20:38:41

I don't think your dds education should suffer in order to meet her brothers taxi

bubblesincoffee Wed 20-Jul-11 20:39:08

I would be very unfair on your dd, and her teacher for her to leave 15 minutes early each day. I doubt the school ould allow it, it ould add up to alot of missed education if they did.

Could the taxi bring ds to the school instead so dh could meet ds there?

Or could ds stay at school a little longer and get the taxi late enough so that dh is home.

My 11yo has AS and will be waiting in the school library for me to pick him up when he starts secondary in September, as like your dh, I can't do to pick ups in opposit directions at the same time! Is there anyher like that that your ds could go to for half an hour after school?

MsCellophane Wed 20-Jul-11 20:40:06

Also, although the comp finishes at 3, it will prob take DS up to 10 mins to get in the taxi. And if the taxi is shared with other pupils, possibly longer. If it is shared, you could ask for DS to dropped home last.

DD takes an hour to get home (20 min journey by car) as they drop the others of first

keepingupwiththejoneses Wed 20-Jul-11 20:40:11

Are you sure he will be in a taxi or is there the possibility he will be on a bus with other children, if he is on a bus it may be that it will take longer to get home, I would speak to your local transport dept before making any decisions. Also the other thing to consider is that the taxi may be able to drop your ds with his dad at d's primary school, my friends dd's bus does that.

Flisspaps Wed 20-Jul-11 20:44:40

Another way of thinking about it is 15 minutes each day = 1 hour each week - which is the equivalent of just over a day every half term, and over a week each academic year.

worraliberty Wed 20-Jul-11 20:45:48

My Son's school wouldn't allow this.

Can't the taxi take your DS to your DD's school?

thederkinsdame Wed 20-Jul-11 21:11:41

You may find DS is grouped in taxi with other children. If so, can you ask if they can do the route in a different order and drop him off a bit later?

penguin73 Wed 20-Jul-11 21:17:41

If DS has an individual taxi would it be possible for him to stay in school a little longer, for example doing hwk in the library or an after school club? I know we have a couple of students who do this and it has really helped with their social skills and they love - if they have had a hard day they sit and read quietly or just 'chill', other days they will help out staff or do hwk.

youarekidding Wed 20-Jul-11 21:35:48

I work in SEN school and second the amount of time it takes for drop offs - if transport is shared adds some 1/2 hour onto some journies.

I don't think it's fair for your DD to miss out for her DB. I know people have to make sacrifices and it's not easy but there is the chance she will resent him for it IME of a family who did similar.

I would look at a way around it with him getting shared transport or being dropped off at DD's school.

Grockle Wed 20-Jul-11 22:05:55

I also work in a SEN school and some of our pupils need to leave early. We plan our day around that and it works - I wouldn't expect other siblings to have to change their routine due to transport issues. Can't your DS leave his school early? Will he be in a special unit at senior school?

Grockle Wed 20-Jul-11 22:11:53

Sorry, is he in a taxi by himself or with others? Can you talk to the LA about this? If there is no-one home to receive him, there needs to be some sort of plan in place so that your DD doesn't suffer but one that suits your DS

FabbyChic Wed 20-Jul-11 22:13:48

Give the child a key and let him have some responsibility for 15 mins.

youarekidding Wed 20-Jul-11 22:15:21

yes Grockle we have pupils who arrive late or leave early too, it's accepted because it's an issue with their transport.

Grockle Wed 20-Jul-11 22:15:38

If he has ASD, it might not be appropriate to give him a key

Cathycat Wed 20-Jul-11 22:26:28

Having a son with ASD myself, I would say that getting your daughter in the after school club would be the best idea. All mine do this, a lot longer than an hour actually (!), still manage their homework and often do it in the after school club. You will feel happier and your daughter will probably really enjoy it. HTH. PS I actually explain to the teachers that as my children do so much after school club, can they accept the homework after the weekend. This is fine.

manicinsomniac Wed 20-Jul-11 22:57:29

There are several options I would explore before taking your daughter out of school early every day.

In order of preference:
1) Ask the taxi to drop your son off at the primary school instead of home
2) Ask somebody who lives near you to walk your daughter home with their children.
3) Give your son a key and teach him about how to be careful in the house for 20 minutes (depending on severity of autism obv!)
4) Request that your son be dropped off last if it is a shared taxi
5) Tell your daughter to wait outside the office for 20 minutes till your husband gets there.
6) Send your daughter to the after school club for as short a time as possible and enquire as to whether you can have a fee reduction.
7) Send your daughter to the after school club for the whole time

Only after all those options had been explored and rejected would I consider disrupting your daughter's (and her classmates'/teacher's!) day like that.

FabbyChic Wed 20-Jul-11 23:23:51

Message deleted by Mumsnet.

sleepysox Wed 20-Jul-11 23:29:03

Fabbychic do you know for a fact that people managed? Knowing quite a few people with ASD, I don't believe they did. There was no talk of paedophiles in the past either.

Pixel Wed 20-Jul-11 23:29:03

To all the people saying get taxi to drop off at your dd's school, this is how we used to get round the problem and it worked out fine.

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