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Family comes first?

(38 Posts)
twinklingfairy Tue 19-Jul-11 13:43:46

I may be being unreasonable, I am on the fence so looking for opinions not an attack.

DBil can get Half price tickets for The Singing Kettle.
He got 4, for himself and his DD, his GF and her DS. But they split up and he had 2 tickets spare.
He put it on facebook that they were going spare.
A friend said he would take them.
5 mins later I logged on and asked did he know that we were down that weekend, any chance the cousins could go together?
Nope, his friend was first, so his friend gets them.
He said he would try to get more tickets for us but forgot and by the time he remembered they were gone.
He suggested I try the box office.

Is it first dibs or should it be Family first, sorry mate?

chicletteeth Tue 19-Jul-11 13:45:23

If he'd already given them to his friend, then yabu

Flisspaps Tue 19-Jul-11 13:46:16

First dibs.

SleepySuzy Tue 19-Jul-11 13:46:45

I agree. First come, first served. But I'd possibly have asked family privately first.

dexter73 Tue 19-Jul-11 13:47:22

His friend asked first so he gets the tickets.

TheMonster Tue 19-Jul-11 13:48:03

YABU. He had promised them to someone before you asked.

twinklingfairy Tue 19-Jul-11 13:49:37

Yeah, probably.
Though the tickets have not changed hands yet, I don't suppose that makes any odds?
Gentlemans agreement and all that.

I dunno though, I reckon, for the sake of 5 mins between us, I would have said sorry mate, but thats just me.

TheMonster Tue 19-Jul-11 13:51:09

If a friend offered me tickets and then said 5 mins later 'oh you can't have them anymore because my SIL has just asked' then I would be quite offended.

Flisspaps Tue 19-Jul-11 13:51:38

No, no odds at all that the tickets haven't exchanged hands or that his friend was only 5 minutes ahead of you. Still first dibs smile

dexter73 Tue 19-Jul-11 13:52:11

It doesn't matter that it was only 5 minutes later that you asked, he had still told someone else that they could have them.

twinklingfairy Tue 19-Jul-11 13:53:48

Would you?
I think if I knew that it was because their Family were going to be there and that the family didn't see one another often etc etc.
I would explain all this so that they understood.
If it was a week before, I would be annoyed, but five mins and publicly on facebook?
I would understand.

twinklingfairy Tue 19-Jul-11 13:55:38

Yeah. Fair enough.

I just think I would have apologised to the friend, but that is just me. I know my friends would understand.
Or I would go all out to get more tickets so that the cousins could get together.

AuntieMonica Tue 19-Jul-11 13:56:48

yup, an offer is an offer, family or not

i would also probably offered to family first, but would not go back on a promise.

YABU to expect him to let his friend down

TheMonster Tue 19-Jul-11 13:57:18

Yes, I would be offended.

He didn't offer them to you first.

SpecialFriedRice Tue 19-Jul-11 13:58:14

I agree with everyone else. Its first dibs.

JanMorrow Tue 19-Jul-11 14:00:57

It's a bit thoughtless of him not to think of you, but bit late for that now!

pictish Tue 19-Jul-11 14:07:59

yeah - yabu - his pal got in tough. Soz.

thisisyesterday Tue 19-Jul-11 14:08:42

first dibs, sorry

Tidey Tue 19-Jul-11 14:10:39

I would always ask family first then ask on fb to everyone else. Sadly he didn't do that, and someone else got in first, and one can't go back on that. Nothing to be done I'm afraid.

OpinionatedPlusSprogs Tue 19-Jul-11 14:11:02

First dibs. His mate has probably already told his kids they are going.

twinklingfairy Wed 10-Aug-11 22:12:13

His mate didn't turn up.

fluffywhitekittens Wed 10-Aug-11 22:21:00

Had he given him the tickets and then he didn't go or was he meeting him there?

Sharney Wed 10-Aug-11 22:23:28


twinklingfairy Wed 10-Aug-11 22:26:19

Meeting him there.

scottishmummy Wed 10-Aug-11 22:28:48

nah,1st dibs gets it,fair is dont chance your arm with the family innit

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