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am i being unreasonable not to want to go to work social do

(13 Posts)
chillistars Sat 16-Jul-11 07:21:46

We have got a lunch time bash coming up at work just for the fun of it as we've just got some great achievements to celebrate, we're all taking in some food for the occasion so there will be a buffet lunch - cakes, loads of unhealthy food etc. None of which I will be able eat due to a serious medical condition.

Plus I don't particularly want to be there for that reason plus I don't think any of my colleagues will want me there anyway (chronic low self esteem here). Am I being unreasonable not to want to take something (I wrote biscuits down on the list that is going round) and not to want to go?

cjbartlett Sat 16-Jul-11 07:29:06


Take something you can eat like a bowl of strawberries or sandwiches

If you cut yourself off your self Esteem will get worse

Who knows you might even have fun!

lisianthus Sat 16-Jul-11 07:31:11

Not being unreasonable not to want to go, but unfortunately YABU not to actually go. Given the jobs situation out there at the moment, you need to avoid being seen as someone who doesn't care about the team. Leave early if you want, but do show your face and have a chat to people.

Sorry to hear you aren't feeling well - hope you are better soon!

vividgingerchilli Sat 16-Jul-11 07:34:26

Thanks...good to have a different perspective on it. Yes, I will be going.

cumbria81 Sat 16-Jul-11 07:39:14

Don't be a misery guts smile, just go along. what have you got to lose? You might surprise yourself.

exoticfruits Sat 16-Jul-11 07:50:34

Glad you are going. YANBU not to want to go, but definitely YABU not to go.

vividgingerchilli Sat 16-Jul-11 08:04:01

No, nothing to lose at all. I'll go and I'll have a good time and nobody will be any the wiser unless one of you happens to be one of my colleagues smile

Andrewofgg Sat 16-Jul-11 10:49:36


Maggie1973 Sat 16-Jul-11 12:59:57

It think you should go. It's usually when you're not looking forward to going to something that you end up enjoying yourself. But i do know what you mean about 'works do's', they can be really annoying sometimes.

SagaciousCloud Sat 16-Jul-11 13:29:08

Well I wouldn't go.

I've never understood why socialising with people you work with, but don't particularly like, is seen as something you should do. If you like them go, if you don't like them don't go.

Make some kind excuse if you need to. I sometimes use the 'I'm not very good in social situations' excuse, guaranteed to get someone saying 'you'll be fine, I'll look after you' though. Even better is 'I'm chronically anti-social', most people laugh at that, and just leave me be, far better.

jazzchickens Sat 16-Jul-11 13:34:02

If it was an evening or out of work-time social occasion and you didn't want to go, I would say don't go.

If it's during the working day and it would be very obvious that you are not participating, I think that's a different situation altogether and you should make the effort.

Energumene Sat 16-Jul-11 13:43:15

Glad to hear you're going, but I sympathise with the concerns - I have coeliac disease, so every time there's a bring and share I find myself just bringing and eating a packed meal because the chances are good that 99% of what else is brought will contain gluten. Except that I then also find myself contributing a dish of some description to the general pool anyway, which used to be frustrating but, since I've now proved to people that gluten-free food can be very tasty, some people now make the effort to bring a GF dish I can enjoy and I feel rather less left out than I once did.

Take some of your favourite foods to eat and enjoy the bash smile

exoticfruits Sat 16-Jul-11 14:13:20

I think that it is always good to try and get on with the people that you work with, being stand offish doesn't make for a good working relationship.

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