To think this is v harsh of the school?

[Clarence15]

Quick background, dd's school did an enterprise week last week. They made things to sell, did tasks etc, and we gave them 50p or so for doing odd jobs round the house at home. Each class has raised a few hundred pounds which is being put together to treat the whole school to a fun day before the end of term. Think they're going to hire a climbing wall/bouncy castle etc.

So today, dd and her class (yr4/5) took part in
a keyboard assembly. They played some songs in front of the whole school plus parents. In parts they had to sing and do some actions. Now they didn't sing very loud so the keyboard teacher kept asking them to sing up, and so did the head teacher. They did a bit but not that much, but none of the parents seemed that bothered, and the music was nice so I didn't think much of it. I did notice the Head commenting a lot to dd's teacher and she did butt in several times asking them to sing louder, as 'she'd heard them sing much louder than that in practice'

They all looked a bit self-conscious especially with the actions, but I just put it down to their age and peer pressure or a few nerves.

Anyway it seems that after they'd finished the Head gave them all a telling off and said that they'd performed so badly that they were not going to be allowed to go to the fun day next week! I didn't see dd straight after school as I was at work but I got a phone call from another mum who told me, and said that some of the children had been upset when they came out so some of the mums had gone into school to see the Head about it.

She'd told the class that they would have to sing two more sings in front of the school again tomorrow, and if they showed more enthusiasm they might be allowed to attend the fun day.

AIBU to think this is a tad harsh? Dd worked hard last week and they've all really enjoyed being responsible for raising the money and deciding what to spend it on. I asked her what would happen to their money if they didn't attend and she said the rest of the school would just use it!

Hopefully they'll be allowed to go but if not I feel like taking her out myself that day and asking for the money back that I gave her!

[catgirl1976]

That does sound harsh! But if it was what the school decide I don't think you should ask for the money back.

[Hulababy]

Way too harsh and really unfair. Any headteacher should be able to know that sometimes children get a bit nervous when performing. She sounds awful tbh and I would be in there tomorrow and complaining. And I am not one to go in normally.

If the ht sticks to her guns then I would keep my child off school on the fun day if at all possible, I wouldn't have her punished for this.

[lubberlich]

How crap is this head teacher?
How can you punish children for not singing loud enough?
She is round the sodding bend.
Of course you must lodge a complaint.

[Al0uiseG]

That's massively out of order, the head is being a total bitch. Get together with the rest of the class parents and threaten to remove all your children for the day. It won't look very good on her attendance report.

[activate]

1. You do not give group punishments
   
2. You do not give group punishments
   

and 3. You do not give group punishments

[pointythings]

I don't think this is a tad harsh, I think this is way over the top and grounds for a written complaint to the Head - and yes, I would be asking for the money back too.

Very, very bad practise on the part of the Head.

[EdnaKrabappel]

very harsh!

1. enterprise week was a separate thing- they put in the work, raised the money and now get the treat. You can't start using this as something to withhold.
   
   
2. given ht was interfering like that, going on in the middle of the assembly about singing up (undermining music teacher too) I'm not surprised they didn't "perform".

[confuseddotcodotuk]

What an awful ht! Rally together the parents iif you can and make a formal complaint, that is actually awful. Poor children :(

[pointydog]

Sounds like a daft threat.

I'd think it's highly unlikely the treat will be withheld. I'd tell my daughter it's a daft threat and not to worry as she'll get her treat.

[PaisleyLeaf]

Is it the Brit School?

[Marshy]

Very harsh and it sounds as if HT realises this too and is looking for a face-saving way of providing the treat. I'm thinking it's pretty much certain that they will all perform sufficiently well on the second attempt to be allowed the treat.
Sounds like she lost it a bit and is regreting it.

[Clarence15]

Thanks, I'm pretty sure she'll let them go now, but dd is currently nearly in tears with even more nerves about not performing well enough again tomorrow

I've told her not to worry and I'm sure the HT will change her mind tomorrow, but just the fact that she's threatened them has really annoyed me.

[Marshy]

The threat is certainly out of order and very tough. I think you should certainly let HT know how upsetting this has been for your dd.

[ragged]

yanbu; any update?

[ChristinedePizan]

How awful

I trained as a singer for a while and I once totally dried up with nerves and I was a lot older and more experienced. What a stupid and ridiculous threat - poor kids are never going to want to sing again. I'm surprised at the music teacher too, she should know better

[GoEasyPudding]

I thought Head Teachers like this were confined to my memories of school in the 70's and 80's.
A totally random act of deranged disapline. Really odd.
Hope it works out ok for you all.

[MerylStrop]

shockingly shit headteachering
the last thing selfconscious kids need is hectoring from the audience
(expect head teacher is regretting it)
if they are not allowed to go to fun day, skive them off en masse and take them to the park

[sausagesandmarmelade]

It's not only harsh but very cruel.........

And the money has to be spent on what it was supposed to be for....

[PuppyMonkey]

I think even if they are allowed to go after all, you should still write a letter to say how cross you were at the OTT reaction and how you thought the original performance was fine etc. Btw, pmsl at "is it the Brit School?"

[LineRunner]

I agree with Marshy. The HT knows she was a tool over this and is now giving herself a face-saving 'out'.

Take the 'out', and have a nice litle chat with HT anyway. Ask her to confirm her own personal ethos regarding encouragement and sanctions. And ask to audit the charity collection.

[Cedise]

The HT was probably not serious about the threat, just using it as a way to make them sing louder.

But what a crap way to do it.

Complain. Complain, complain, complain.

[Fecklessdizzy]

I'd have a good whinge, that's well out of order! You don't make nervous people do better by shouting at them, for fuck's sake ...

DS2's school had a concert-sort-of-thing last night and a group of singers were being very quiet and uncertain. when they finished the music teacher ( a fab bloke) said how good they were and would they mind just giving the next one a teeny bit more welly so his deaf ( and I suspect, non-existant ) Ol' Granny at the back could appreciate their efforts ... They nearly had the roof off!

[WhoseGotMyEyebrows]

What a wanker! They are 4 and 5!

[Insomnia11]

I'd be very angry about that and be wanting to speak to the head. Completely unacceptable. It's making me angry just sitting here.

Does the head think she's running Fame Academy?

Fair enough if they'd mucked about and geniunely been very naughty. But it sounds like it was definitely NOT the case.