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To not want to be the childminder?

(10 Posts)
Squiglettsmummy2bx Mon 11-Jul-11 19:03:18

I live in a 1st floor maisonette so my garden has a gate that leads on to a path & small grassy area outside my front door. There is a larger grass area along the front of the houses. My children, 8 & 5 play in my garden & in the area directly outside my front door, often with the little girl, 6,from next door. A family of children, all cousins ranging from 4 to 11, who live much further up the road where the houses have front gardens rather thanthe open grass area often play & ride there bikes on the grass area near my flat & became friends with my children which is nice & I have been fine with them playing in my garden too but now feel I am being used as a free child minding service. 1 girl who is 8 is continuously playing dangerously, climbing on my garden furniture, shed etc& I have had to speak to her mum & 1 boy is 7 & has ADHD & autism & does incredibly dangerous things such as go through a neighbours ashtray to find matches etc. He has broke numerous items in my garden & his mums response is always that he has SN & needs watching. That is fair enough but surely I am not expected to watch him from 4 til gone 7 every evening??? I am currently pregnant & suffering with awful nausea & tiredness, I do not need to be supervising every child on the street when mine are well behaved & playing nicely. These childrens parents & nan are childminders so are looking after other peoples children for money while leaving theirs to me. AIBU to think this is a bit of a piss take?

AmberLeaf Mon 11-Jul-11 19:05:53


As the 7 yr olds mum is aware that her son needs watching.......*she needs to watch him* ! not you!

It is a bit of a piss take.

BoysAreLikeDogs Mon 11-Jul-11 19:11:27

turn the children away, lock the gate, be polite


missmalteser Mon 11-Jul-11 19:11:34

YANBU for not wanting to, but by the sounds of it their kids would usually play out on the street unsupervised anyway,so i'd probably either lay down the law & not let them play if anything else was broken, then if the parents question simply explain you do not have the time or inclination to provide the close supervision they obviously need to prevent damage to your property.

fedupofnamechanging Mon 11-Jul-11 19:14:07

You need to stop them from coming into your garden. They are not your responsibility, so send them home with a polite 'not today', when they vome over to play.

Agree that the parents are taking the piss, but you are letting them if you don't do something to change things.

fedupofnamechanging Mon 11-Jul-11 19:14:59

vome should read come. Don't know what I was doing there!

YellowDinosaur Mon 11-Jul-11 19:36:38

At the point where his mum said 'he has special needs and needs watching' I would have said 'thats fair enough - next time he wants to play in my garden you need to come with him in order to supervise him'. Or say 'In that case I'm afraid they can't come round to play anymore since I don't have time to supervise other peoples children'.

Given that you didn't say this at the time I'd be inclined to either tell them 'not today' next time they come over, or alternatively go and speak to the mum again and tell her the above.

Problem solved!

YellowDinosaur Mon 11-Jul-11 19:38:13

I'd also tell the children politely but firmly that they are NOT to climb on any of your garden furniture / the shed / play with your belongings in a way that they are likely to break and that if you see them doing so they will be sent home and will not be allowed to play at yours again.

Nagini Mon 11-Jul-11 19:42:50

YABU for not telling her that she needs to watch her own kids!

Squiglettsmummy2bx Mon 11-Jul-11 20:41:02

Thank you all. Tomorrow I will only allow my kids & next door neighbours DD in & will state that the others are not allowed as they need supervising & I am not able to do that as I am busy doing something else. I went down to find 1 girl in my Heather bush hanging over fence to pick blackberries from my downstairs neighbours garden. My bush is all snapped & flat now so I have the perfect reason to implement garden ban.

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