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AIBU with regards to dd7 birthday

(29 Posts)
tjacksonpfc Mon 11-Jul-11 14:08:47

Ok its dds 7th birthday this week and she doesn't know hwta she wants. The thing is she isn't into anything in particular. So I have said that if she doesn't think of something in time for her birthday we will give her some money for when we go on hols in August.

Dp has said we can't do this its not fair she must have something on her borthday. My argument is i'm not prepared to go and buy something just for the sake of it that might not get played with anyway. I was talking to a couple of people at school today and they have also said i'm being unreasonable.

Its not as if she isn't going to have anything we are having a cake made for her and she will have prezzies from family just not from us untill she decides what shes wants.

Who is being unreasanable me or dp?

Off to a meeting at school but will reply when I get back thanks smile

Fecklessdizzy Mon 11-Jul-11 14:14:37

Why not give her a nice little treasure chest/ money box thingy with some cash in for her birthday and she can then spend it or save it until her holidays?

We did this to DS2 last year and he was chuffed to bits, he spent ages deciding what to buy ... I think he just liked feeling rich!

javo Mon 11-Jul-11 14:15:20

I don't think you are unreasonable - she will have presents after all. I too hate buying just for the sake of it. If you want to placate your DH could you buy some bits that she needs in the coming weeks - such as some books, craft kits etc for the summer break , some new pj's etc.

MummyTigger Mon 11-Jul-11 14:16:09

I think that if she understands that, and if she's having presents on the day from other people and a cake etc. then what's the issue? If you feel she's old enough to handle the responsibility of holiday money, then why on earth not?

At the end of the day it's your decision and I agree with you: why spend loads of money on something she's going to play with once and then never touch again?

Callisto Mon 11-Jul-11 14:18:09

I think YABU. She is only seven, money won't mean anything. Surely you can find something you know she will like, even if it is just some really nice art stuff? And why can't she have money now and some spending money on holiday?

My DD would be very upset if I didn't get her anything for her birthday and told her she could have money in a months time.

Callisto Mon 11-Jul-11 14:19:56

Or how about some lovely, grown up jewellery that she can keep forever? DD has a lovely collection of silver jewellery that family and god-mother have given her over the last few years.

itisnearlysummer Mon 11-Jul-11 14:20:18

Give her some money and let her wait until she finds something she really wants.

tjacksonpfc Mon 11-Jul-11 16:56:53

Thanks all for your responeses, I've just asked her again what she wants and she still doesn't know so I explained to her about the money and she's happy with that. I'm still getting it in the neck from dp though hmm

BabyDubsEverywhere Mon 11-Jul-11 17:05:48

My DD will be three in November, she isnt into anything, (unlike DS who could fill a wish list with Toystory and Cars crap in 30 seconds flat.)

This year I am going to buy her a charm braclet, (an adult sized one) and a few charms, (3, one for each birthday shes had) I then plan to buy her a new charm each birthday/special event/maybe the odd Christmas, basically any time i can think what the heck to get her! Ill be holding off aslong as poss to actually give it to her, hopefully her 18th or something.

I dont think you are being unreasonable, but Id still get her a little something to open, does she have a camera, just thinking of the holiday coming up?

Ragwort Mon 11-Jul-11 17:08:04

Why on earth doesn't your DP sort out the present if he is so opinionated about it?

I agree with you, there is absolutely no point in buying something just for the sake of it.

DeWe Mon 11-Jul-11 17:23:23

I did something similar for dd2's 7th birthday. I got her a craft box which I filled with lots of stickers and paper and crayons etc. It didn't cost much so I took her shopping with a certain amount. She loved it, and bought a silly little battery dog that I would never have bought but she loves. grin She's already asked if she can something similar next year.

mumnotmachine Mon 11-Jul-11 18:23:34

Does she like craft stuff?
For my dd's 8th birthday I had a similar problem.

I bought one of those plastic units with loads of drawers in on castors and filled it with paper, card, glitter, pens, ribbon, stickers, googly eyes, card embellishments etc etc etc,
I bought masses from the Poundshop, and filled the whole thing for about £20.
She absolutely loved it, and used it for years, its only this year that shes got rid of it as shes not so into crafting now and it all fits in a smaller box now.

Guaranteed hours of fun, and fab for rainy day or a quick fix if friends are over

tjacksonpfc Mon 11-Jul-11 20:30:53

She loves craft stuff but unfortunatly she got that exact same thing for xmas, with all the drawers and craft stuff. Ive told DP that he can go out tommorow and get her something if he's that bothered by it so this should be interesting seeing as hes never bought the dcs prezzies. I'm waiting with baited breath as to what he will come home with lol.

cat64 Mon 11-Jul-11 20:36:49

Message withdrawn

TheFrogs Mon 11-Jul-11 20:51:32

I think it's fine but would still be nice to have some things to open. Do you have a Home Bargains near you? They have allsorts of cheapy crafty kits..paint your own moneybox, built a model animal, decorate a jewellery box etc, all just a couple of pounds.

AuntiePickleBottom Mon 11-Jul-11 20:55:28

mumnotmachine, that idea sounds fab think i will get that for my son for 25th december

mumnotmachine Mon 11-Jul-11 21:04:32

It works well Auntiepicklebottom, have a look on ebay as well, theres some fab stuff there.

Its something you can keep adding to as well- and easy to pick up a couple of bits every week at not great cost, but all added together over a few weeks is an amazing present which will keep them entertained for hours, I promise you!

Nanny0gg Mon 11-Jul-11 21:07:30

One of my dcs wanted money rather than presents when they were about 16, so that's what they got.
They were really disappointed not having presents to actually open that they've never asked for just money again.

Mowlem Mon 11-Jul-11 21:33:00

I'm kind of with you.

In our house the present is the party that DDs have. They cost a lot of money, so the children only get small tokenistic presents. Last year, DD got a hair curler at a cost of £15 and a couple of little things for under £5 (nail polish, box of chocs etc). This was for her 7th birthday. I spent no more than £25 on presents. But the party cost me.

I think its nice to have a little something to open, even if its only a book, some chocolate etc... but I don't think it has to be big.

Ragwort Tue 12-Jul-11 08:06:59

Mowlem - you sound very generous, £25 would be a 'big' present in our household grin.

tjacksonpfc Tue 12-Jul-11 18:08:29

ragwort I.m teh same as you £25 for a birthday presant in this house is a big presant lol

neolara Tue 12-Jul-11 18:11:38

My dd is going to be 7 in a few days time. She recently did electronics at school and loved it, so her present is going to be an electronics kit. Just a thought.....

LyingWitchInTheWardrobe Tue 12-Jul-11 18:12:03

I'd put DP in charge of buying your DD a little something for her birthday to go with the money. It seems a very good idea to me to not splurge out on something she might not be interested in, just for the sake of her birthday. You can still celebrate the day in style.

I love the idea of a treasure chest! Perhaps DP could go to 'Clare's Accessories' or similar and buy a few 'pretties' that can go in it.

Hope DD has a lovely day.

yomellamoHelly Tue 12-Jul-11 18:20:19

Trampoline for garden. Story cds. (What our 7 yo is "into" at moment.) Admittedly trampoline quite extravagant. For actual birthday he wanted (and got) magic set and chemistry set.

valiumredhead Tue 12-Jul-11 18:24:03

I think YABU. She is only seven, money won't mean anything

Hahahahahahahaha you're kidding right? shock

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