Just come home from a weekend with the inlaws and whilst it was all very lovely there were one or two moments of...well, ...
DP & I have been together 12 years, have two DCs, and spend a reasonable amount of time with his family. I've always got on well with DPs siblings who both live at the family home now, having finished uni, and they are great with our DCs when we go to stay. BiL is quite a few years younger than I am, and is absolutely hero-worshipped by DS, to the extent that when we stay, DS will sleep in BiLs room. Which brings us to the first weirdness...
I'd taken DS up to his bed (zedbed type affair next to BiLs double bed), and I was semi-lying on BiLs bed, reading the story when BiL came in. I said I'd just finish the chapter and then go (assuming he wanted to change or something as he was planning to go out), he said fine, pootled about a bit, then laid down on the bed I was already on, apparently ready to go to sleep. I felt a self-conscious about this, but just finished reading, saw that DS was asleep and left.
Then when we were leaving, I was in the living room with both DCs and BiL. Kids said goodbye to BiL, I went to give him a distanced hug and peck on the cheek (usual method of saying 'hello' and 'goodbye' to all members of DPs family), when he put his arms around me and kissed the top of my head (DPs family are all much, much taller than I am, as I am an utter short arse). I said 'Thanks very much for a great weekend and for keeping the kids entertained' (actually I said it into his chest as still had his arms around me), went to give him the usual peck on the cheek and at that precise moment, he turned his head and kissed me full on the lips. It felt very weird and very wrong.
I really can't decide if I'm being oversensitive and blowing this out of all proportion, or if he's being slightly inappropriate, but I feel very, very odd about it.
AIBU?
to think my BiL shouldn't kiss me on the lips?
iceandsliceplease · 11/07/2011 13:11
The first incident seems like nothing much. A full smacker on the lips is a bit 
though.
Do he and his brother have the same taste in women perhaps? 
Was this part of a wider range of behaviour that's a bit yik, or a surprising one off (IYSWIM?)
Speaking as a fellow short-arse, I know how weirdly off target tall peopl's kisses can be... 
knitted breast - that's kind of my take on it, but I don't want to sound like some weeping delicate flower type.
he's not normally yikky tchoot, he usually treats me in the same way as he does his sister, so this was a surprising one off. Like you say, a giant kissing a short arse can go way off target, it's just that he had already kissed me (or at least my hair, again, evidence of height mismatchedness), so I wasn't expecting another kiss.
I've never had any creepy or lechy vibes from him at all in the past, which is another reason why this has freaked me out a tad.
Chickens - my uncle used to do that too. And he'd put both hands on the backs of my elbows so I couldn't pull away
He wants to stick his trouser snake in you.
It's not complicated
MooMoo - I just moved towards the door, feeling very awkward and avoided looking at him (and as I did so, realised that we were alone in the room) and said a cheery 'yepthanksbye!' as we both went downstairs to where everyone else was. DP, DCs & I left five minutes later. TBH I don't know if he would have said anything either way - I think if anyone else had been in the room I probably would have made a jokey (and doubtless vulgar) remark, but I was just a bit .
HP, you're very possibly right - it was his bed, and I was the one who was semi-lying/lounging on it in the first place! I know I've been overthinking this, because I'm analysing any contact we had over the weekend and asking myself 'was that normal? was that ok?'. I've even been trying to remember if he gave my DC a kiss when they said goodbye!
Well however you did or didn't react can be explained by your 
at the time. The same could apply to him if it was an accident, I suppose.
I would still expect him to have said something though - after all, you're his SIL - surely if he didn't mean to make you think he was trying it on with his SIL, he would be falling over himself to explain that he wasn't, wouldn't he?
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