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AIBU to expect my SIL NOT to open a parcel addressed to my nephew?

(157 Posts)
alison222 Wed 06-Jul-11 16:11:13

I sent a birthday present to my nephew and had a message today to say it had arrived safely and that she approved of my choice of wrapping paper. This means she opened the parcel addressed to him. I had marked it with sender on it so she knew it was from me and she told me what he would like so she knows what it is. He will be 9. Part of the pleasure of getting a parcel is to be able to open it yourself surely?

oohjarWhatsit Wed 06-Jul-11 16:14:18

has she opened the entire thing or just the brown paper

if just the brown paper, you are being daft

alison222 Wed 06-Jul-11 16:15:35

just the brown paper but still It was addressed to him and she knew what was in it so no need to open it. My kids say they would be upset even though the wrapping paper is intact

nickelbabe Wed 06-Jul-11 16:16:58


oohjar - it doesn't matter if it was just the brown wrapping! shock

When I send presents throug hthe post, i never wrap them, because I class the envelope/jiffy bag/brown paper to be wrapping.

Bogeyface Wed 06-Jul-11 16:18:17

YABU because she didnt actually open the gift itself, and perhaps it was precisely because she knew it was from you that she took off the brown paper so it could go in his present pile in its gift wrapping.

PiousPrat Wed 06-Jul-11 16:18:25

It does sound as if she has just opened the parcel paper, rather than the wrapping paper IYSWIM so in that case, YABabitU. Maybe she just wanted the bright wrapping paper to stand out with the rest of his presents as IMO brown wrapping paper looks crap when mixed in with nicely gift wrapped presents and tends to make them the last thing opened as they look dull.

It could be that she didn't want your gift left until last because of the brown paper as by then your DN might be a bit low in enthusiasm and she knew he would love it, so wanted to give it the prominence it deserved?

I have to open all parcels from the DCs father as he tends to send them in just the brown paper, no wrapping paper inside, and not only do they look crap next to the bright, pretty ones, they are often scuffed or torn at the corners from being posted so I always open them and rewrap them in different paper so it is clear they are from him, not me.

biddysmama Wed 06-Jul-11 16:18:47

yanbu, i leave them at the door aswell so the get the full 'getting something in the post' experience

exoticfruits Wed 06-Jul-11 16:19:56

I always take off the brown paper and then put it in a pile for the day. I don't open post, but who wants to have horrible brown parcels in the pile? If it arrived on the day I would give it straight to them as they would have already opened the pile.

Kayzr Wed 06-Jul-11 16:20:50

YABU. It is just the brown paper. To most children it is just another bit of paper that they have to rip off to be able to see their present.

LyingWitchInTheWardrobe Wed 06-Jul-11 16:20:54

You're not being unreasonable, OP. Kids love having parcels through the post. What joy is there in not having the brown paper to rip off first? I would understand if it were a random parcel but your SIL knew it was coming, and it's from you.

The circumstances as described by PiousPrat are different, completely understandable - and kind.

elphabadefiesgravity Wed 06-Jul-11 16:21:02

How old is he?

My children are 7 & 9 and I would unwrap parcels addressed to them so I could make sure it was something appropriate (you get all sorts of junk mail these days especially if it was a present and I knew it would have proper wrapping paper underneath.

It would be different if they were teenagers.

MsTeak Wed 06-Jul-11 16:22:28

Yabu, I'd open it.

alison222 Wed 06-Jul-11 16:23:42

elphabadefiesgravity - He will be 9. She told me what to get so she knows the content.

MackerelOfFact Wed 06-Jul-11 16:24:40

YABU, she would have realised it was a birthday present and just taken off the brown wrapping. I would've done the same, my mum used to do the same for me. Unwrapping parcels is exciting but pales into significance against unwrapping birthday presents. You'd take off the packaging if you'd ordered something online, I don't really think packaging material is that appealing?

If it hadn't been his birthday then YANBU, opening his parcels would be unacceptable.

TheFlyingOnion Wed 06-Jul-11 16:25:05

who cares? Jesus!

MackerelOfFact Wed 06-Jul-11 16:25:33

Plus it allows her to hide it away somewhere until his birthday.

AuntieMonica Wed 06-Jul-11 16:26:10

i probably would have opened the brown wrapper too

lots of reasons, but mainly cos i'm really REALLY nosey!

elphabadefiesgravity Wed 06-Jul-11 16:26:32

An 8-9 year old I would definately have opened it then.

Doyouthinktheysaurus Wed 06-Jul-11 16:28:28


DH opened ds2's parcel yesterday to leave the wrapped pressie with all the other wrapped pressie's.

I have no idea why you are unhappy about ithmm

ajandjjmum Wed 06-Jul-11 16:29:52

My DC are late teens, and I open the packaging so that the present in all it's glory is on display with the rest.

TBH op, I think YABU.

kalo12 Wed 06-Jul-11 16:31:30

at least she approved of your choice of wrapping paper!!!!!!

(control FREEEEAK grin)

breatheslowly Wed 06-Jul-11 16:31:51

YANBU - getting post is a rare pleasure as a child. Taking the brown paper off takes the "postiness" away from the parcel.

LaWeasel Wed 06-Jul-11 16:33:04

I think it spoils it.

Does no one remember how exciting parcels were?

misty0 Wed 06-Jul-11 16:35:38

I'm an opener too smile (if i know its a prezzie inside. They're always wrapped in paper)

3DDs and we make a big show of the prezzies/cards/balloons/banners the night b4 for them to get up to on the morning.

They receive alot of parcels through the post, sometimes a few weeks in advance - alot in 'recycled' pagaging - carrier bags used as wrapping, old amazon boxes, ect - and it isnt pretty.

Never crossed my mind to leave it 'as is'. Sometimes theres been a letter for me inside the box anyway - so i guess its expected that i'll open it?!

BluddyMoFo Wed 06-Jul-11 16:38:00

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

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