To be concerned that our daughter is planning to take her 12 year old son on a 100+ mile walk in a week

[bootothe2]

would this not risk permanent damage?

[ApocalypseCheeseToastie]

No, people are too reliant on cars these days, we have a 50 mile charity walk each year, kids as young as ten take part without lasting damage.

Takes around 12 hours so not too bad

[Tortoiseonthehalfshell]

Permanent damage to what? His legs?

I'm asking seriously, because surely if he's really not up to it, they'll just cut it short. They can't force him to walk past his endurance to the point where it causes permanent damage.

[whatever17]

I am sure your DD loves her son without reserve and will not do anything that causes him harm.

Just trust her parenting skills. If she thinks he can't cope, she will stop him.

[NearlySpring]

If the 12 yr old is capable of doing it then yes YABU.

At 12 I did a 100 mile march around Nijmegen in Holland. 4 days of 25 miles per day. It was bloody hard and we did lots of shorter distances in the months leading up to it in preparation. We learnt how to look after our bodies (particularly our feet) how to stay hydrated and had lots of adult supervision. It was amazing and I went on to do it again a few years later.

What is this 100 mile walk?

[NearlySpring]

Apocolypsecheese.. 50 miles in one day? I'm seriously impressed that 10 year olds can walk this distance in 12 hours that's almost 5 miles an hour factoring in rest breaks- that's speed walking!!

[bootothe2]

Not sure what damage could be caused, just recall hearing that kids shouldn't use gyms and such like due to injuries to growing bodies.

[HerRoyalNotness]

Using gyms and running marathons are completely different to a walk. Good on them I say, why don't you join them?

[Tortoiseonthehalfshell]

Some gym work is not recommended because it's about repeated impact on growing joints - landing heavily over and over, that sort of thing. Walking is a low impact exercise.

It sounds awfully vague, your concern, to be honest. Do you usually distrust your daughter's choices for her child? She's been a mother for at least twelve years, so I'm wondering whether there's a pattern of distrust here.

[hairfullofsnakes]

I think this is too much for a 12 year old so yanbu - have you voiced your concerns?

[exoticfruits]

Do you mean spread over a week? If it is a 7 day walk it is only around 15 miles a day. I don't see a problem, if he has had training and is used to walking over 10 miles at a time. It wouldn't be good to suddenly do it, if he is generally a 'couch potato'.

[Goblinchild]

What's her back up plan if he can't manage it?

[bootothe2]

Thank you all for your +ve thoughts and more informed views than my own. As for vague concerns and patterns of distrust; as much as it might displease, you are barking up the wrong tree. I have not voiced concerns as I wasn't sure of validity. Think I'll just focus on thoughts around preparation and a backup plan.

[CogitoErgoSometimes]

I've regularly taken my DS on walking holidays from age 4 - in fact, we're doing another one this summer. I've seen other families on those holidays with 6 and 7 year-olds who will happily tackle 14 or 15 miles in a day, get home and still have the energy for a game of rounders in the evening. A 12 year-old is perfectly capable of covering off long distances on foot. Your daughter presumably wouldn't deliberatly put her DS in harm's way. Rather than a 'back up plan' which sounds a little interfering tbh, give her a little credit and simply offer your support and encouragement.

[malinois]

No its not too much. It might be too much in 2 days but certainly not spread over a week. We did the Lyke Wake Walk with Guides when I was 12: 45 miles in one day over the North York Moors. We all slept well and were fine the next day!

[Tortoiseonthehalfshell]

Why would that displease me? I was trying to say that if she's never given you reason for concern before, and your concern this time is not founded on anything but a general impression, then she deserves the benefit of the doubt that she's thought about this and made a responsible choice.

And yes, your mention of shifting your thoughts to 'preparation and a backup plan' sound very much like you a) doubt that she's making a good decision and b) will need your input. With respect - she has a twelve year old. She probably already knows how to parent him. And prepare for a holiday herself.

[PrincessJenga]

I did the coast to coast walk at 12. My brother was 10. It took us two weeks of walking anything from 6 to 21 miles a day. It was an amazing experience. We met some great people, developed our independence and had some great stories to tell when we got back to school. My gran didn't have a back up plan as she knew mum & dad had it all under control. She did however, meet us for an ice cream at the end & tell us how proud she was.

[musicposy]

I'd have thought this is fine. I walked the Pilgrims Way with my Church as a teenager, from Winchester to Canterbury. We split it over a couple of weekends but walked a lot of miles each day, certainly 20ish which is less than your son is doing. I got some blisters and aching legs but I loved every minute! I'd do this with my girls (15 and 11) like a shot and I know they'd cope.

Unless he has a medical condition we don't know about I'd have thought it would be really good for him. Gyms and marathons/ competitive running are an entirely different thing.

[musicposy]

soory "which is more than your grandson is doing.
Duh!

[JoleneJoleneJoleneJoleeene]

Maybe you should go to gransnet then where there will be a whole forum of interfering grannies who will agree with you

[Chandon]

depends if they trained properly or not.

H walked 100 miles in 24 hrs once, had not trained properly, and was very ill for days afterwards (burning up with a kind of fever, dehydrated, unable to eat, feet to shreds...). now that was a bit stupid.

[Ripeberry]

Had to stop myself laughing at this thread. Don't you realise that EVERY day in African countries, children as young as 5yrs old have to walk 2-3hrs twice a day just to get to school?
Good on him for walking that far and for charity. What do you think our ancestors did before the car.
And then most people did not have a horse or cart, walking was the only way and the last time I looked I think our legs are still the same as theirs.
Gimme strenght!

[2littlegreenmonkeys]

YABU. I am sure your daughter knows what her DS can cope with, as long as it is spread over a few days I don't see the problem.

My dad took myself and my brother for very long walks from a very young age, thinking I was about 7 and walking 15+ miles a day along the coast in the summer holidays.

My DD1 who will be 4 in November (DD2 still uses buggy) walks with me to my nana's and back again which is an 11 mile round trip. She manages it just fine and still has loads of energy left after. We have plenty of rests and I take the double buggy in case she needs to sit in it for a short while.

I think sometimes we are to reliant on vehicles and it does all of us good to get out there and actually walk. Get to see so much more and keep fit and healthy in the process. This is one of the reasons DH and I got rid of our car (not that I drive anyway)

[bootothe2]

Got some great help but won't use this forum again!

[Tortoiseonthehalfshell]

Ah, so you only wanted thoughtful, politely-worded advice if it also didn't confront your assumptions.

Got it.

[2littlegreenmonkeys]

Haha why because we didn't all do a shock horror face at the audacity of a mother wanting to taker her 12 year old DS on a 100+ mile walk?!?!