She's being unreasonable/an unhelpful twonk, right?

[Rosmarin]

Long story short, been having a few scuffles with the girl who's supposed to take over my room in a shared flat of three. Her tenancy starts 1 July but as a favour we've been letting her stay in the flat for the last week. I've been away and have to move out tomorrow, though I only get back from an overnight long haul flight in the late morning. I also left her my set of keys as a favour, which means I'm dependent on someone meeting me back at home tomorrow to let me in. The flat is in central London and it's a self-locking mechanism plus a big outer lock door so there's no way around keys.

I asked her to leave my keys in the flat on the move day so that I can get in and out (will have to make various trips to and from new flat/old flat as only using a car) and so that our other flatmate doesn't have to be tied to the flat or go without keys herself (no spares)...and she said it's not convenient for her because she has a work party that evening and will be back 'probably after 11'.

AIBU to really push the point that me co-ordinating a move without my own keys is really more of a hassle than her asking our flatmate to let her in once at night?

This is just one in a long line of her not being helpful at all. She also can't pay me the deposit on time because she doesn't have her chequebook with her at the flat and no internet bank account...

[Rosmarin]

** And I'm sort of stepping on egg shells because it's her who pays me the deposit (reimbursing me and forming her own deposit) so I'm somewhat at her mercy and don't want her to take money off.

[iwanttoseethezoo]

Can you not just get another key cut? Costs about £4 and makes life a lot easier!

[gapants]

Find another flat mate!

In london that should be no problem, the withholding of the deposit would have alarm bells ringing!

[MadYoungCatLady]

Tell her to give yout keys back now if she is being that bloody unreasonable!!! And can she not withdraw the deposit from her account?

[Rosmarin]

She's not going to be my flatmate luckily. I'm the one leaving! We can't get the keys cut because we'd have to get written permission from landlord and it's too late for that (she could have before but had me leave the keys instead).

[Rosmarin]

I guess I could ask her to withdraw the deposit amount and give it to me in cash but I worry about having that much cash hanging around until I can get to my bank (moving to a nice dodgy area ). She also won't be at the flat the whole day I'm there and moving because of her work party and work - which means she doesn't have to face me ever and is more likely to knock money off the deposit.

[PrincessScrumpy]

she is taking the p*ss

[browneyesblue]

YANBU - they are your keys!

If she isn't able to give you your keys tomorrow, take them today

[Rosmarin]

I'm still away - I leave here tonight and arrive there tomorrow morning, so no chance of grabbing the keys if she won't leave them.

Why are people so wierd?

[RosieMapleLeaf]

Could a friend of family member pick up the keys from her today, and you pick them up from them when you get in tomorrow?

And maybe they could pick up your deposit for you too, while they're at it!

[Rosmarin]

I might just end up hanging around 'my' room all night until she gets back, though it could be a long time, just to show her I'm serious about the deposit. However, that doesn't mean she'll pay it on time if she doesn't have her chequebook or an internet banking account.

Argh. I know she's doing it on purpose because she knew way in advance she'd have to pay this tomorrow. Tricky situation.

[AnneTwacky]

Tell her she can have the keys when you get the deposit.

[ShoutyHamster]

Yes. Hang around until she gets back. With a mate, or let the original flatmate know the situation and have her around. So that she can check the state of the flat with a witness :) and you can helpfully make sure that you don't budge, or give her the keys, until you have the full deposit. Take it in cash if she makes any excuses. She's trying it on (and is a cheeky little scrounger anyway by the sound of it - she's had a free room for a week as a favour, but can't even be courteous to you in return?) I'd be upping the deposit as a charge for using the room in return for her putting you out like this, but that's just me

[Rosmarin]

What's the withdrawal limit from an atm in the UK? The deposit is over £700.

[Sparkletastic]

most won't you let you take more than £500 in one day - £250 to £300 for most single transactions and 2 withdrawals in one day (from different cash points) I think - not 100% sure though.

[Sparkletastic]

She's totally being a dick - don't let her play you

[hellospoon]

get your housemate to get the keys today so you have them tomorrow.

£700 is a lot of money to loose, no deposit no keys. she is playing you

[LillyTheMinx]

She is being unreasonable.

£4 to set a set of keys? I must be going to the wrong place!

[SoldToTheHighestBiddy]

Take her to the cashpoint when she gets back on the night and get out the maximum. Then keep the keys and come back in the morning for the rest. She won't need to leave the flat in the meantime because she'll be sleeping of her works party, right? :)

Seriously, her attitude is a red flag - she's going to try it on. If you get arsey, she'll probably back down. Get those keys.

[Rosmarin]

Ah, thanks everyone for the supportive comments!

Still no reply from her or the other flatmate. I seriously doubt she'll leave the keys. I have texted other flatmate to prompt them all to read email but I bet there's going to be a 'I didn't check my email before leaving the house so didn't leave keys' excuse tomorrow from her.

Have asked a couple of male friends to hang out with me at the flat until late and I'll take her to the cashpoint if needs be. I assume she's working on Friday and won't be out that late on Thursday therefore, but I could be wrong.

You're right, Shouty, she could at least be nice. My worry is that as she's being unhelpful 'for no reason' there is a hidden reason (e.g. she doesn't want me to have the keys/upper hand and will avoid coming home because she doesn't want a confrontation). Also, if the deposit is left for her to do without a face-to-face meeting I wouldn't put it past her to skim money off for 'damages' or similar.

This is what you get for giving people the benefit of the doubt. Argh!

[ShoutyHamster]

Yes. Take mates, get pissed off, and be at the flat. And if she mentions damages, then reply that you've been considering things and given her unhelpful attitude, you've changed your mind about doing her a favour and are going to charge her an extra week's rent for last week.

Just be utterly blunt with her and tell her (with a smile of course) that you don't appreciate people trying to take the piss. So pay up or there's going to be hell :)

[Rosmarin]

Well I got a fairly rude text finally saying she'd see whether she could leave them or not. "And if needs be just get your stuff out of the room and forget about cleaning it."

It's nice to have this to look forward to.

Thanks again for the support ladies (and gentlemen?).

[MerylStrop]

She doesn't officially live there yet right?
You are being really nice.
I would TELL her that you NEED your keys, and that you will ensure she can get in from her work do. And TELL her (once you have the keys in your hand) that you will be needing the deposit before she gets the keys back. Qhy the eggshells? You are doing her a big favour and she sounds more than likely to take the piss.

[iggitwotimes]

She is living in your flat. She has paid no money, right? And now she is being obstructive. Can you call her bluff and say you're thinking of going to the next person on your list?
At least pretty soon you'll be shot of her (unlike your former flatmates!)