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to want to know...

(10 Posts)
purplepidjin Fri 24-Jun-11 18:05:42

...what NOT to say to my 39+3 mate?

So far I think I have trodden the fine line well. Today I stuffed up a bit by asking if she was planning a second (this is the first)

What else should I avoid? So far:

>I haven't touched the bump (have been invited to but baby hasn't been kicking while I was around)
>I haven't commented on how big she's got apart from how well she's managed to only put weight on the bump, not elsewhere (something she was worried about in early pregnancy)
>I have made it clear I don't expect to see her for the next month or two, or until she contacts me
>I have made it clear I'm happy to do washing/cleaning/supermarket shops/watch baby for an hour so she can have some time to herself
>Discussed with her how we can accomodate baby in our weekly swimming

Am I doing it right? I don't have kids or neices or nephews, and DP's nieces and nephews were all toddlers and up when I first met them <scared>

pilates Fri 24-Jun-11 18:11:37

You sound a great friend, lucky mate.

Flisspaps Fri 24-Jun-11 18:14:08

Don't make any sort of comment along the lines of 'no sign yet', 'are you STILL pregnant?', 'is it ever coming out' etc etc if she goes overdue.

Don't go on about letting her have 'time for herself' too often, some people (like me!) don't want any and are quite happy to just sit about with the baby and not go for a nap/walk/long bath smile

Just carry on being your lovely normal self. You sound like a fab mate.

justpaddling Fri 24-Jun-11 18:16:03

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

purplepidjin Fri 24-Jun-11 18:56:35

Heehee, Fliss, we had that conversation today when we met for lunch. She's being bombarded with texts etc asking if she's had it yet! I've told her my shifts for the next week and said that if she needs a lift anywhere just ring. Otherwise, I assume I'll get one of two options.

1) A phone call in about a week going "Piiiiiiiidj, any chance you can pop to the supermarket and get me some milk"

2) A phone call in a month to see if I'm up for going swimming and do I fancy a cuddle

Oh, or 3) "Pidj, I've got no (essential item of clothing) how fast can you make me some" wink

She's got more experienced family close by so while I've said I'm happy to help, it's only if Mum etc aren't available

They told me the name yet, so it's either something outrageous or they haven't decided. I expect that nodding and saying how much it suits baby are the recommended responses???

Flisspaps Fri 24-Jun-11 19:13:35

Yes, absolutely the right responses for the name, even if she calls it something Ludicrous, like Talaylahlee-Bob or JimboJetSetBaggins.

She may find this website of use: - it was my facebook status for bloody weeks

purplepidjin Fri 24-Jun-11 19:31:20


<trots off to post it on her wall>

jeckadeck Fri 24-Jun-11 19:43:52

it sounds like you're doing everything right, tbh, you sound like a very sensitive and thoughtful friend. The only thing now is to avoid any labour/induction horror stories, but you know that, don't you grin

iMemoo Fri 24-Jun-11 19:45:04

You sound lovely, will you be my friend?

purplepidjin Fri 24-Jun-11 19:49:59

<eek> Will she insist on telling me the gory details? We're both pretty independent and i don't think I need to know about all that thanks!

Yes, iMemoo, of course I will. Especially if you like hand-made baby clothes grin

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