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Boarding school at four years old?

(248 Posts)
mightybright Sun 19-Jun-11 19:17:55

SIL works for the MOD and BIL is in the navy. We were at their house on the military base today and she told me that her neighbour has put her 4 year old daughter into boarding school. I said 'four, that's young' and SIL completely freaked out then stormed away from the table.

I'm not judging their neighbour, I don't even know her, I just said it was young which perhaps in hindsight was insensitive but I do feel she overreacted, aibu?

exoticfruits Sun 19-Jun-11 19:19:41

Four is too young-full stop.

LordSucre Sun 19-Jun-11 19:19:48

yanbu - is your sil thinking of doing the same then? Bit of an over reaction!

MoonGirl1981 Sun 19-Jun-11 19:19:57

No, it is young. Too young, really.

I know someone with an eight year old in boarding school and I can't get my head around that.

Glitterknickaz Sun 19-Jun-11 19:20:25

I think a wee bit young, yes.

meditrina Sun 19-Jun-11 19:20:52

Someone is winding someone up somewhere.

There are no UK boarding schools which take 4 year olds.

MoD does not pay CEA before children are 7/8.

mightybright Sun 19-Jun-11 19:21:23

No, their DC's are 8 and 12. Their 12 year old has just started at boarding school as the navy pay.

marycorporate Sun 19-Jun-11 19:22:36

The thought of my 5 year old being at boarding school makes me want to cry but I'm not from an army background, it would be more normal if that is what your friends and neighbours were doing. Some parents think it preferable to moving the child from school to school every month or so. let people parent the way they want I say.

mightybright Sun 19-Jun-11 19:22:50

Their neighbour is a single parent and had to go back to work so put DD into boarding school

bubblecoral Sun 19-Jun-11 19:22:52

There must be more to this, what did sil say when she was freaking out?

Of course 4 is far too young to have a child in boarding school, and if sil is considering it then she obviously has issues with it herself. If she was confident that it would be a good thing to do, she wouldn't feel the need to freak out while trying to justify it.

pooka Sun 19-Jun-11 19:23:09

My dad went at 7 and I think that is harsh.

He was miserable until he was 13 and went to next school where he had a good housemaster who took an interest in him.

marycorporate Sun 19-Jun-11 19:23:59

I don't think that can be the reason mighty, why not get a nanny?

LIZS Sun 19-Jun-11 19:24:08

This is the second thread about boarding schools for 4yr olds this week.

Hulababy Sun 19-Jun-11 19:27:26

There are some English based private schools that take boarders from Y1 - that would be 5yo. Most are from age 7y up. Not seen any from 4y yet though.

Grabaspoon Sun 19-Jun-11 19:30:21

I work for a SP in the army and could understand that this may be an option re childcare for the child. Short notice exercises lasting anything from 2 nights to 3 weeks, working long days 7.30-6.30, deployments, working nights on guard duty. If the parent doesn't have relatives close by/who can help then surely this is the better way of ensuring care/continuity of education instead of being shipped off to gp's every coupld of weeks. It would be sad but understandable.

Hulababy Sun 19-Jun-11 19:30:41

Boarding schools: www.ukboardingschools.com/

mightybright Sun 19-Jun-11 19:36:24

She said that the mother had no option, it was her job and she needed to work, I was a bit too shock to take much of what she said it

everlong Sun 19-Jun-11 19:37:50

Why did your sil have a strop?

4 and boarding school omfg.

bubblecoral Sun 19-Jun-11 19:39:21

Of course the Mother had an option. Working in the military is surely not the only thing she could possible do for work. But perhaps she care more about her job than her very young child. Sad, but happens.

mightybright Sun 19-Jun-11 19:39:36

that was meant to read 'what she said in '

meditrina Sun 19-Jun-11 19:40:13

As there are no UK boarding schools which take 4 year olds, there must be a misunderstanding. Perhaps she has a childminder who will do overnights?

meditrina Sun 19-Jun-11 19:41:13

I think the military is a red herring here - they pay fees only for over-8s.

mightybright Sun 19-Jun-11 19:42:08

bubblecoral - Well I would have though so, I know I wouldn't be able to do it but I really don't know the ins and outs of her situation.

mightybright Sun 19-Jun-11 19:43:39

No she had to go away for work, not just nights. I'm not sure what she does, something in the navy though.

Grabaspoon Sun 19-Jun-11 19:44:02

Remember the military offers other perks ie a house, a steady job, and more or less school holidays off - xmas/easter/august so is probably a good career for a SP. She may not be able to afford childcare/mortgage etc in a civillian job / she may be half way through her agreed sign up.

Just because you wouldn't do it doesn't mean it's wrong.

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