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If I was telling me this story, Im sure I would tell me to get over myself

(10 Posts)
boyoboy Sat 18-Jun-11 21:51:42

But it still farking makes my blood boil!!!

DD was invited to a fancy dress Princesses and Superheros party...DD is no 9 and so very borderline about dressing as a princess sad but agreed to do so in the spirit of the party. The party was aimed at a much younger group but DD and 2 of her freinds had been invited too.

We gets there and to DD's horror the other girls her age have dressed in thier normal civvies...

but DD said it was ok, although I could tell she was gutted...these 2 friends proceed to completely blank her....half an hour of the party later and much ignoring later DD welled up and said please can I just go home.

One of the freinds mums said her daughter had tried to involve DD and when i pointed out that she hadnt at DD had sat with me for the last half hour it was plain that this girl had been lying but then her mother made no other moves other than to shrug and walk away...

So I made no fuss and came home....felt like my insides were ripped out and I wanted to absolutley RANT but my little voice of reason was saying "its just kids, its just a party" but fark me DD isnt th most confident kid and I could tell she was devasted sad sad

Do i just need to get over myself??

lobatteries Sat 18-Jun-11 22:15:58

No, mum and her dd are not nice people at all. Least you can both hold your own heads up high. Small consollation right now.

quirrelquarrel Sat 18-Jun-11 22:19:40

Being left out is always a bit of a blow. Not the end of the world, but not nice for your DD, especially during a birthday party, when it's meant to be with people you like (not all thrown together like at school).

I wouldn't dwell on it, except maybe to make up for it by inviting a nice friendly person to play soon after.

ConnorTraceptive Sat 18-Jun-11 22:22:45

I wouldn't have asked her to dress up tbh. Not helpful after the fact I know

blackeyedsusan Sat 18-Jun-11 22:26:29

it hurts like hell doesn't it? I am trying to work on teaching dd strategies to deal with this sort of thing... but at a 4 year old level.

ConnorTraceptive Sat 18-Jun-11 22:33:40

I think you need to create a positive distraction as soon as possible this week. A nice friend over for pizza and dvd's?

Spuddybean Sat 18-Jun-11 22:35:53

poor her and you. being excluded is nasty. do something nice for you both. As Conner said above.

fit2drop Sat 18-Jun-11 22:51:28

What a sweetheart for falling in with the plans and Good on her for joining in the spirit of the party. That says an awful lot about your DD and what a kind and thoughtful girl she is.
I would re-enforce the niceness of her attitude and explain that not everyone is comfortable with making individual choices and only feel confident when following the crowd. That her behaviour made her stand out in the crown in a good and positive way and that you are proud of her.
yanbu for being upset that she was ignored but if you make an issue of it your DD will pick up on it ,

DoMeDon Sat 18-Jun-11 23:01:46

Unfortunately you do need to get over it - you know any fuss will make it worse for your DD. If it's any consolation I feel for you and DD. Being left out is harsh and watching your DC being treated that way is heart wrenching. Well done for keeping your cool. FWIW I am angry for you both!

confuseddotcodotuk Sat 18-Jun-11 23:02:32

YANBU. When I was 10 I was invited to a birthday party involving the whole of my year six class and others. Girl's birthday was on halloween and I was told that it was fancy dress by birthday girl.

I was the only one out of 30 or so who turned up in fancy dress. A proper witches outfit with green face paint and everything. I was absolutely devestated when they all ignored me for the enitrety of the 3 hour party sad

Maybe you can see if she'd like to do something with one or two friends to cheer her up?

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