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to think DH cant have it both ways (and is being a bit of a wanker today to boot!)

(11 Posts)
Bogeyface Sat 18-Jun-11 09:20:53

On weekdays he is chivvying the kids along to get up, get dressed, be ready by X time etc, and doesnt appreciate any buggering about. Neither to I tbf, but.....at the weekends they wake up around the same time and he gets snappy with them about them being up and making a noise when he wants a bit of a lie in.

Now we generally take it in turns but whereas I will just let them get on with it while I am getting up and sorted he always get stroppy. Now imo you cant expect them to be up on the dot of half seven every morning, having had it drilled into them and then just expect to "forget" that at weekends.

Or can you and I am being U, as I have been told I am this morning?

Also, on 4 hours sleep, I dont think that it being inferred that I am being a lazy cow because I got up half an hour after him, after he had more sleep than me as I did the night feeds, is on either. When I came downstairs I cleaned the kitchen, loaded the dishwasher and washing machine and mopped the floor while he sat growing his arse and has just gone to get himself some breakfast. But I am "having a go" when I pointed out that the lazy arse isnt actually me.

He is back at work on Monday after nearly 3 weeks off Paternity leave and neither of us is looking forward to it, so I dont think that that is helping.

darleneoconnor Sat 18-Jun-11 09:31:27

If you have a 3 week old and older dcs then you are both probably pretty frayed atm. How old are the other dcs? Can they get themselves breakfast and put on the tv? They should try not to be too noisy but your dp cant expect silence. If you are both off work why are they getting up that early anyway?
Btw i wouldnt have got as much done as you by this time in the morning if i was in your situation.

musicposy Sat 18-Jun-11 09:31:39

YANBU. He's being a wanker. Kids get up early full stop; tha's what they do. Until they're teenagers, of course, when they lay in bed until 2pm (look forward to it!)

Paternity leave is the work of the devil if you are married to my DH. I was ready to kill him by the end of it.

atswimtwolengths Sat 18-Jun-11 11:56:01

I think things will be a LOT better once he's back at work.

Doesn't he realise the point of paternity leave is to make your life easier?

Icelollycraving Sat 18-Jun-11 12:41:36

Lol at growing his arse

Tortoiseonthehalfshell Sat 18-Jun-11 12:44:39

Bogey, what on earth are you doing mopping floors with a three week old and don't you have, like, 6 children? Bloody hell, woman. Take the baby back to bed and let the rest of them get on with it.

Dozer Sat 18-Jun-11 13:03:16

He is being unreasonable. Babyshock?

DoMeDon Sat 18-Jun-11 15:16:48

YANBU. But do try to avoid the competitive tiredness or 'who's the laziest' game - that way insults and misery lie. You have DC, they are noisy, tell him to grow up and deal with it. Having said that DH and I shut the living room door when the other is having a lay in to minimise noise. There's also nothing wrong with teaching your DC to keep the noise down when someone is in bed though.

Jaspants Sat 18-Jun-11 15:21:39

Agree with tortoise

Sharney Sat 18-Jun-11 17:05:01

Totally agree with Tortoiseonthehalfshell! Hair not brushed? Who cares? House untidy? Big deal. Beans on toast 3 nights in a row? Believe me, there's tonnes worse.
Try to relax and enjoy your new bundle of joy.
Oh and breathe! smile

Bogeyface Sat 18-Jun-11 21:57:44

Thanks guys

The thing is, I am doing a big family dinner tomorrow (11 of us altogether, I know I KNOW!!) and I wanted the place looking spick and span. I wouldnt have my parents and my sis and BIL around the house with it looking the way it did this morning grin

I am just annoyed that he thinks that just feeding and changing the baby is helping without considering anything else. I would like to feed her too! I managed about half an hour with her today and when dd2 (9) asked why I was grumpy I said it was because I had to do all the jobs ready for tomorrow and didnt like being nagged for lunch at 11:30 (as they were doing at the time) and he actually looked affronted, like how dare I infer that he wasnt helping! Clearly his idea of paternity leave is to spend as much time as possible with the baby, which I am fine with, and not giving a toss about anything else, which I am not fine with.

I was quite worried and tearful about him going back to work on monday, now I am thinking that it will be good because I can actually spend some time with the baby!

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