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To NOT want to clean my house in order to sell it

(146 Posts)
NorksAreMessy Fri 17-Jun-11 22:13:23

we have been renting since November. We thought it was a long let, but in January, our landlord decided to put the house on the market, having failed to sell it last year. Three months, we had been here, and now who knows what will happen.
There are several problems with the house. The shower has never worked, the front door glass is cracked and could easily be pushed in or shatter, the central heating is rubbish, the under sink pipe is wrongly comnected..loads and loads of other problems NONE of which have been solved, despite phoning the agent LOADS of times.

We now have a letter saying that before we have a viewing, we should clean the windows, clear crumbs off the counters, empty bins, not feed the cat smelly food etc etc etc.

I am a bit pissed off about this, but I thought the MN jury could advise me. Obv. I will clean to a certain level, out of courtesy, but windows? Normal children's nonsense?

They are trying to sell our home out from under us, and want us to help, yet will do nothing to make the house gorgeous for us, or potential buyer.


EricNorthmansMistress Fri 17-Jun-11 22:14:27

I would do fuck all, but then I'm a bitch

chicletteeth Fri 17-Jun-11 22:15:32

Other than making sure there's no floaters in the toilet or old rotting food lying around, as well as keeping it to a reasonably clean standard (this is realise is quite subjective), then you shouldn't do anything else

Bogeyface Fri 17-Jun-11 22:15:42

I would reply that you will clean to a basic standard but that you cannot do anything about the other issues in the house that may prevent a sale and can they confirm when they will be dealt with, as per your tenancy agreement?

CointreauVersial Fri 17-Jun-11 22:16:50

Ha! Your landlord has a lot to learn! Give your cat fish every day. grin

PelvicFloor0fSteel Fri 17-Jun-11 22:17:41

I don't know what your legal obligations are but I would do the bare minimum you need to do to meet them. Their requests sound over and above what you should be doing, bloody rude under the circumstances.

LineRunner Fri 17-Jun-11 22:18:20

Oooh, I thought you meant you were like me, which is that I can never ever move house because I could never ever sell my house because I will never ever clean it enough.

I am doomed to stay in Crusteria Avenue for all time.

In your case, tell them to send in a cleaning company, when you have moved out.

GooGooGadget Fri 17-Jun-11 22:18:29

I was going to come on and call you a dirty fucker. But YANBU. I'd do fuck all.

If LL wants clean windows, he can pay a window cleaner.

NorksAreMessy Fri 17-Jun-11 22:20:47

I have been rushing around tidying teenage bedrooms, and at some point I thought, WTF am I doing here? It is Friday night and I ought to be doing bumsex and drinking absinth, not trying to sell the only home I have.

LittleMissFlustered Fri 17-Jun-11 22:22:29

I find hat those foil sachets of wet cat food make for exceptionally stinky cat poo. Just saying...


xstitch Fri 17-Jun-11 22:23:48

I would clean the crumbs off the surfaces and do a general tidy for general pride. everything else no, the LL can come and do it himself if he is so bothered.

SuePurblybilt Fri 17-Jun-11 22:23:58

I would do fuck all twice. Actually no, I'd do enough to not shame myself and no more.
And the cat would be getting rancid whale slops three times a day.

SybilBeddows Fri 17-Jun-11 22:27:34

I think your LL is incredibly cheeky. I hope you hang around and tell all the viewers all about all the stuff that is wrong with the house.

flaurenoko Fri 17-Jun-11 22:27:58

Personally, Id make sure there was a floater in the toilet..

TheCrackFox Fri 17-Jun-11 22:33:44

If the landlord wants it clean he can do it himself or pay someone to do it. Why should you clean it? Infact I would go out of my way to make it a shit hole.

NorksAreMessy Fri 17-Jun-11 22:34:16

I was thinking of making big signs.... for the shower saying ' careful, shower tray not attached' and ' don't slam the front door' and 'this radiator does not work' etc etc

Any other suggestions.

Potentially homeless Norks

Assailant Fri 17-Jun-11 22:35:57

What does your contract say?
Personally I'd do the bare minimum contractually required of me.

But I'm a bitch too grin

NorksAreMessy Fri 17-Jun-11 22:36:39

Sue I love 'fuck all twice'. I did laugh.
Am eating apricots to induce smelly floater, thanks for the ideaflaure
bogey is that realio trulio legal stuff?

SybilBeddows Fri 17-Jun-11 22:37:02

good idea.

if you're there for viewings you can helpfully show them the boiler just dropping in casually 'Of course you'll be replacing it since it doesn't really work but you might like to see where your new one can go.'

NorksAreMessy Fri 17-Jun-11 22:38:37

contract says that we should let people look round, that's all.
Basic pride, though, makes me tidy up....but be pissed off about it.

Slightly worried about losing deposit, but if they want to do that, they will think of something else.

A tenant's life is not a happy one sad

NorksAreMessy Fri 17-Jun-11 22:39:34

Ooh, syb... good one

TheCrackFox Fri 17-Jun-11 22:40:45

"contract says that we should let people look round, that's all."

You are far nicer than me because I would make the place look like something out of Kim and Aggie.

You should only lose the deposit if the house isn't clean after you have vacated it.

Assailant Fri 17-Jun-11 22:40:54

Well then, there's your answer wink. You let them look round.

Not your fault you're craving herring soup and your living room's a bit untidy.

The return of your deposit is surely dependent on the state you return the property in at an inspection after vacating it n'est pas?

Make sure nothing on show is breaching any rules in contract, but beyond that if it's untidy... well, what can you say

NorksAreMessy Fri 17-Jun-11 22:43:40

am making herring soup NOW, thanks assailant

Any other good ideas gratefully received.
Am now feeling confident and NAUGHTY!

TheCrackFox Fri 17-Jun-11 22:45:49

You could always have the house immaculately clean but release a stink bomb just before any potential viewers come in through the front door.

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