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to miss London....

(84 Posts)
gottomakeaquiche Thu 16-Jun-11 20:40:26

Hello all.

DH and I lived in London for 15 and 20 years, both heading their after our studies (we didn't know each other then). I was 24 and planned to be there only for 5 years - yeah right! It was a hard place to live but I knew it well, along with all its plusses and minuses.

We met, got married and had babies (nice). We lived in a great part of town and had all our mates around us..growing our babes up in and around the parks swaffing lattes as we pushed buggies and talked about what we were doing that weekend, etc etc. It was a fantastic time but I always wanted to sample family life in the countryside, it was kind of on my bucket list having come from the country/small city in the country.

So..DH got made redundant, we got stupidly broke and decided this was the time to make the break and move out of London closer to home and family. DS and DD are 6 and 3 so good times to do it.

It's been a tough couple of years but we are now feeling more settled in the village that we live and have made some pals here...not that connection that you feel immediatly to new pals that you meet in London (why is that?) Anyway, work for DH has continued to be frustratingly tough with little work about. That I can handle (sort of) as he is now working at anyjob going just to get the money in - phew we got there in the end.

My question is this..does anyone else miss living in London? I hated it and loved it at the same time. I hated the aggression on the streets and I love the safety and 'niceness' of living out of it, for me and my children. I loved the bubbling opportunities everywhere and miss that sense of anything being doable. I hated the gazillions of people and love the ease of where we live now...its just that I'm a bit lonely inside for those other crazy nutters that I used to find all over my old city - I suppose that is to say my true best mates...

Thoughts most welcome.

rooks14 Thu 16-Jun-11 20:45:18

I do to sad

I grew up in London and moved to manchester for Uni where I met OH (who's originally from here). I know by the time we can afford to live there again, we'll be thinking that DS needs to live somewhere where we can have a big garden etc!

Why is London the only place in the country that slow people stand on one side of the escalators and fast people can walk down the other. That's what I miss most.

FridayFanjoFun Thu 16-Jun-11 20:50:27

This is an interesting topic for me. I am a Londoner (as is DH) and have never lived in any other part of the UK (DH lived in Brighton for a few years, but is also for the most part a hardcore Londonite).

We have toyed with the idea of leaving. probably not to 'the country' as I don't think we are cut out for rural/village life, but Brighton or somewhere down on the South Coast appeals...but...but...

I am scared I will be posting on MN in 5 years time regretting leaving.

I can totally see why people leave London. It can be very draining sometimes.

In some ways, we have the best of all worlds right now, because we live in a nice suburb of London, so it's not dirty/crime ridden/ too fast paced, but we can tap into all the things 'proper' London can offer when we want to. But, realistically, we bought a house in London when it wasn't silly monies, and these days it is very hard for people to have that 'best of both worlds' option here in the big smoke.

Be interesting to hear what others say...

NetworkGuy Thu 16-Jun-11 20:55:58

Being nosy, how far did you move, and can you estimate the local population (to give some idea of the change you've taken on) ?

In your situation, if you've moved to somewhere truly 'rural' where the nearest supermarket is 10 miles away and so forth, it would be a big 'shock' IYSWIM and employment opportunities etc more challenging, than in some town such as where I've ended up.

BulletWithAName Thu 16-Jun-11 20:57:53

Hmmm. I miss the convenience of London- the public transport, shops and takeaways open all night...that sort of thing. I don't miss the scared feeling I used to have living there ie. being harassed by school boys under the underpass where I used to live, and my DH being mugged in front of me. And the gangs that roam the streets.

So I'd say overall. I don't miss it. I love living somewhere I feel safe and knowing my children are growing up in a nice area.

worraliberty Thu 16-Jun-11 20:59:38

I love London because of the opportunities so would never move until the kids have gone through school/uni and DH has retired...then I'd like to move just outside London to a seaside area.

I kind of have the perfect mix of everything here because I'm on the border of East London and Essex so there's plenty of open space just a little way away.

BulletWithAName Thu 16-Jun-11 21:01:45

Worra- Anywhere near Walthamstow?

gottomakeaquiche Thu 16-Jun-11 21:03:05

Ah yes the escalators...the politeness of people being in a real hurry! How can you have all those people in one place (ie the tube) but being so non commital/communicative to those in your armpit?! Its hilariously bonkers...very english perhaps.

Manchester? What a fab place to be right now with so much in transition and the beeb on your doorstep..its important for such an organisation to spread the love around the country..not easy for those having to travel/weekly commute I guess.

Regretting leaving...thats good to mull over Friday. I can't honestly say thus far I regret leaving as its good to sample other things that life has to offer and I truly feel that we have/are doing.

I think DH is on the verge of nailing another job in his industry which means he will be commuting. Am almost ashamed to admit that I am going to be slightly jealous of his going into town everyday and experiencing some of that buzz! How funny...yet another angle I guess.

Am thinking that we have to follow lifes twists and turns. There is a saying that you should never go back..we lived our lives to the full in London town, experiencing all of it..the good and the freaking awful for many years. Am in this unusual place of not having a five year or even five minute plan..very very unme. Am thinking that we have had lots of knocks so have learnt to hold on bare knuckled rather than plan on maybes - its a bit uninspiring though.

Time will tell I guess...perhaps we will move into another city in time...Oxford mebbe...

Just to finish, the babes are happy as, the air is fresh and its about time I kicked my lardy body into shape, got my eybrows waxed and started to spend some time on me.

Lovely chatting with you ladies!

JoySzasz Thu 16-Jun-11 21:04:52

I lived in London for 34 years (all my life) then moved to the rural Midwest in the states ....massive change.
I will be 40 this year and
next year we are going home,but to live in Dorset ...I wonder if I will have the same doubts smile

I have really done rural,so I am hoping Dorset will seem busy in comparison!

I wouldn't raise the children in london now anyway,so I will have to get on with our choice ...till they are adult anyway...

troisgarcons Thu 16-Jun-11 21:09:54

Londoner born. Have lived half a world away in isolated and war torn communities.

Give me London anyday. The best city in the world. Every race, creed, colour. Everyone speaks, everyone gets on. Personally never come across prejudice, knife crime, violence etc.

Best city in the world.

gottomakeaquiche Thu 16-Jun-11 21:15:51

I also miss other communities big time...

ho hum!

shakey1500 Thu 16-Jun-11 21:16:34

Oh I miss it soooo much! Lived there for 7 years, met dh, made a killing on selling our property at the right time, moved to Wales for the birth of ds. Great, near family, no mortgage/rent, by the sea BUT...

I miss working in the heart of London, wandering around Leicester Square in my lunch break, wondering which West End show to see that month, sitting in Waxy's Little Sister off the square people watching. Never failing to be moved by the buildings, the history, it's vibrance, the feeling that you were part of this fast moving, incredibly friendly, "we're all from all over the world but have conjoined, here, to live and share this moment and isn't it fucking FANTASTIC?!" atmosphere...I could wax lyrical forever.

gottomakeaquiche Thu 16-Jun-11 21:17:10

Joyszasz..dorset is fab! I know Dorchester well and its a great size with tons going on...best of luck.

troisgarcons Thu 16-Jun-11 21:19:22

I don't work in the City anymore - I miss groomed men, I miss the smell of decent aftershave, I miss ladies in tailored suits, I miss seeing a decent pair of shoes polished and without heel scratches!!!

I miss civilisation

gottomakeaquiche Thu 16-Jun-11 21:21:16

I hear you Shakey, I miss it alot too.

Would still have the fear of taking the babes back though, which school etc etc..towards the end of living in London I found myself not exactly frightened to go out but frightened of getting home...taxis were great when we were minted but having had a few frigging horrid near misses on the public transport with scary people I absolutely wouldn't think of getting home late by using it...its a shame really.

Not sure if that was just my frame of mind or it was me knowing that it was time to go.

troisgarcons Thu 16-Jun-11 21:22:36

I miss - big time - Lunch!

OMG I'm going to break down ..... (((Wine bars))) decent, civilised winebars .

gottomakeaquiche Thu 16-Jun-11 21:22:57

Perhaps it was inspirational? We could all see the next step up eg..the working suited and booted, the houses, etc etc...there doesnt seem to be so much to work for now..

could be just me though

gottomakeaquiche Thu 16-Jun-11 21:24:28

ahem...about the ,chatting with you ladies,...that is gentlemen too!! Great to have both on this forum

JoySzasz Thu 16-Jun-11 21:25:03

Thanks gotto when checking the local paper,something is always going on so ...fingers crossed smile

You are right about that saying ...I am holding on to that one too ...especially when dreaming about Wimbledon Village smile

I also like change though,probably you do too ?

Rosebud05 Thu 16-Jun-11 21:25:58

Of course YANBU.

It's a fantastic city.

I know a few people who grew up in London and they all say that they didn't realise how lucky they were until they left. And they all came back.

worraliberty Thu 16-Jun-11 21:26:47

Worra- Anywhere near Walthamstow?

Not really, but I suppose it's around half an hour or so in the car? I'm nearer Ilford way really smile

EnnuiGo Thu 16-Jun-11 21:28:19

Yes i do...sometimes

DH and i studied in London and lived there for a couple of years after we got married - then the money ran out and we moved to the absolute arse end of nowhere....DH work is good, we have two DSs and the schools are fab and everyone knows everyone else and it's great and pretty and we have cows in the garden and i have many dogs and it's lovely...

.....but hell yeah! I miss it.....

London has something so special about it....we go and visit as often as we can....<laments>

<looks at lovely quiet as the grave neighbourhood and rejoices>

<misses London>

...............that didn't help did it?

shakey1500 Thu 16-Jun-11 21:28:45

gottomakeaquiche Can see what you mean. We left with belongings in a transit van 2 days before ds was born. I had visions of giving birth on the hard shoulder of the M6 and having to call him Bernard after the AA man. No question that I'd have found it a bit hairy transport wise.

Maybe you did "know" it was time to go. For me it was absolutely the right descision at the time. I had a bad M/C the year before and I NEEDED to be near my family for this one. Cried buckets when I saw my sister had kitted out the baby's room when we landed in Wales. I clearly remember thinking to bump "Its'ok, you can come now" and he did.

Sorry, slight deviation there! But yes, understand your reasoning.

gottomakeaquiche Thu 16-Jun-11 21:29:16

I think I do Joyszasz..Americaland...my dh and I alwas dreamt of going over there, with what we do we would probably do ok..both self employed though so green cards? yeah right!

EnnuiGo Thu 16-Jun-11 21:30:24

<remembers the grotty streets / noise> - boo

<looks at locals getting excited at automatic doors at co op> - weeps

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