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Has anyone got any good ideas for revenge?

(71 Posts)
anniemosity Wed 15-Jun-11 19:12:46

I was just wondering if anyone had any ideas for revenge that they had either carried out or fantasised about on abusive twat exes. I see nothing wrong with revenge as long as it makes you feel better. I have namechanged for this post.

Several years ago I was unfortunately in an abusive relationship with a creep who was obsessed with himself, cannabis and sex. He had tried to bully me into taking cannabis as well as class A drugs and into taking part in sexual practices I was very uncomfortable with. Plus lots and lots of other things, too much to go in to right now.

When I finally broke up with him for good, I returned the vibrators he had bought me (yes he bullied me into using sex toys too, I hated it ) with a note which read:
"Dear Ex-Creep, I have had my use from these. They were better than anything you had to offer me, but not as good as what I'm getting now. You don't need me to tell you where you can stick them."

Childish I know and it would have definitely hurt him as he always saw himself as God's gift to women. And it made me feel soooo much better and over him!

LineRunner Wed 15-Jun-11 19:16:43

Really?

GoodnightNobody Wed 15-Jun-11 19:16:58

best revenge- never contact, show interest in that person ever again.

Developing your own life/ happiness is a stab through the heart for abusers wanting some sort of power over people.

That or rubbing their belongings in dog poo.

BluddyMoFo Wed 15-Jun-11 19:17:35

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

GoodnightNobody Wed 15-Jun-11 19:17:48

<disclaimer- I've never done the dog poo thing >

LaurieFairyCake Wed 15-Jun-11 19:22:35

"the best revenge is living well" Italian proverb

Or you could sew prawns in their curtains.

cookcleanerchaufferetc Wed 15-Jun-11 19:27:20

What about getting a friend to call him, pretending to be from local family planning clinic and tell him he has to see his doctor as he might have some digusting STD that makes his dick ooze pus ......

Alternatively ignore him

Onemorning Wed 15-Jun-11 19:28:15

I was in an abusive marriage. I have a great life now, and that is my revenge.

I'd repeat the advice to move on.

akaEmmaFrost Wed 15-Jun-11 19:34:43

I have done the revenge thing in the past, when very young.

However I know now that everyone gets what is coming to them and you dont have to do a thing to facilitate it. You may not be around to see, moved on etc it but I truly believe the saying "what goes up, must come down". Karma takes care of the fuckers, it really does.

NeverEvenHeardOfAgentZigzag Wed 15-Jun-11 19:36:51

I have a lovely friend (and that's not sarky, she really is) who got to her soon-to-be-xDH by cleaning the underside of the bog with his toothbrush and replacing his shampoo with hair removal cream (he was going thin on top and it really bothered him).

I'm not saying what she did was right, but he was a wanker of the highest order.

Pumpernickel10 Wed 15-Jun-11 19:39:07

Just look at your life now, how great it is, you don't need revenge dear you need to forget it and smile smile

lemmein Wed 15-Jun-11 19:55:11

Best revenge is ALWAYS success! Be happy - they hate that

Punkatheart Wed 15-Jun-11 19:57:08

Laurie is spot on. Live well. Be happy. Otherwise you twist yourself up and waste your life being bitter....

Mandy2003 Wed 15-Jun-11 19:57:31

Prawns (cooked or uncooked) inserted into hollow curtain poles is always a good one.

The best revenge is to live well.

My ex told me when I left that I was so old, fat, and boring that no one would ever look twice at me and the best I could hope for was a pity shag.

Now, which one of us has a new DP and which one of us is on our ownio ? hmm

Karma is the answer. Karma will get them in the long grass.

ZXEightyMum Wed 15-Jun-11 20:08:12

I am having the very best revenge too by living well and happily. My lovely DH is a fantastic Dad to DD abusive XH is a hilariously deluded desperate saddo.

No need for any further recriminations although I will admit to peeing in XH's bath before we split up knowing how he liked to get right under the water.

DogsBestFriend Wed 15-Jun-11 20:10:34

The best revenge is to never respond, never react, never even acknowledge the person.

Indifference hurts. wink

Pixieonthemoor Wed 15-Jun-11 20:17:50

Yes - live well and be happy (also, cut a tiny slit in the stretchy fabric of his mattress and insert a lobster. It will rot and you can imagine what that smells like. Or, when he is going on hols, let yourself back into his place, sew watercress on the carpet, water et voila!! Prawns in the heating system of the car is also a good one). I have never had the guts or really the need to use any of these but the thought does make me smile!! Tee hee.

IDrinkFromTheirSkulls Wed 15-Jun-11 20:27:55

You boring gits!

Where are all the bunny boiling horror stories...all we have so far is dog poo and prawns!

Unfortunately I don't have any good revenge stories (as I am a boring git).

akaEmmaFrost Wed 15-Jun-11 20:32:39

Ok I will tell you what I did when young and stupid.

Cut pockets out of his trousers, he always forgot and would put money and keys in there only to have them cascade down his leg.

Cut the handles of his suitcase but he didnt know until after he packed it and went to pick it up. Tee Hee.

And worst of all rang his live in girl friend when I found out about her and told her everything.

In my defence I was a silly little 19 year old and would never behave like that know. Am old enough to realise that Karma sorts everything out.

ZXEightyMum Wed 15-Jun-11 20:59:31

Ohhhhh I had forgotten this one but XH used to disappear into the bathroom for hours on end after taking God knows what hmm and I long suspected he was doing things to himself with the roll-on deodorant. MINE, might I add angry

I knew I was right when I sprayed Deep Heat on it and he emerged looking very uncomfortable.

grin at Boring Gits. I didn't get the chance to do half of what I wanted to because it was imperative to get him gone once he showed that his true colours and violent tendencies would only ever escalate, not dissipate when our baby was born. DD was only months old but it was thankfully my house, my career I had gone back to, my childcare arrangements that had been made, my money paying the bills.

sad for anyone living with an utter twat like that especially with young children.

I absolutely would never dream of peeing in a measuring jug and topping up my cheating exH's prized Whisky bottles. Never, you hear me?

Callisto Thu 16-Jun-11 09:31:40

Surely the best revenge is to be happy and fulfilled. Then you don't feel the need to get your revenge anyway.

LyingWitchInTheWardrobe Thu 16-Jun-11 09:35:38

When my husband annoyed me about something I added 'Alvin and the Chipmunks' song to his heavy rock compilation that he was making when he went out of the room. He didn't notice then... grin

SocialButterfly Thu 16-Jun-11 09:36:41

ZXEightyMum what was he doing with the roll on deodrant? <naive emotion>

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