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AIBU?

AIBU to think these nursery nurses should have done something?

20 replies

JambalayaCodfishPie · 15/06/2011 11:06

Yesterday i walked past a nursery. As it was sunny, all the toddlers were outside. One particular toddler spotted me, and seemed convinced that I was his mum - he ran along the fence shouting 'mummy, mummy' - right up to the gate.

I didnt know what to do, so I continued walking, and then he started to cry- he was clearly convinced that I was his mum, and i was ignoring and walking away from him.

There were several nursery nurses also present, and they stood there and laughed? This toddler was clearly distressed and they did nothing.

Today I am seriously considering giving the nursery a call as I feel quite upset by this.

AIBU?

OP posts:

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GypsyMoth · 15/06/2011 11:07

stood chatting in a group were they?

yanbu!!

honeyandsalt · 15/06/2011 11:14

YANBU, poor kid. Write the nursery manager a letter expressing your concern about the cruely implicit in laughing at the distress of a child in their care, making it clear that you expect her to seriously speak to the staff involved, and that you look forward to her reply.

Toughasoldboots · 15/06/2011 11:16

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ImeldaM · 15/06/2011 11:17

Yes, definitely complain, they should have intervened & explained to him that you were not his mum, maybe even involved you in chat, so that if you spoke to him, for example, he would have realised.

When you phone, make sure you ask to speak to manager, as I would hope they weren't present at the time & can talk to staff that were.

Mishy1234 · 15/06/2011 11:19

Definitely contact the nursery and complain.

whatsallthehullaballoo · 15/06/2011 11:20

YANBU - if he was upset and didn't just go on his way to play I would expect that a someone should have comforted and reassured him that you were not mummy/that his mummy would be back soon etc.

Write a letter to the nursery about your complaint and say that unless they respond in a suitable way you will pass the letter on to ofsted.

2BoysTooLoud · 15/06/2011 11:22

Another one for complaining.
Even if manager was present at incident - may make them think next time.

MumblingRagDoll · 15/06/2011 11:30

Oh call and coomplain for sure! The cows! i saw a similar thing with a childminder at my local playgroup....laughing at a 1 year old she had in her care when he fell or when he could nt reach the bicuits....sadly I never saw them again and couldnt report her.

CheeseandPickledOnion · 15/06/2011 11:31

YANBU. Complain, possibly to the local authority too. That's horrible.

SingleFosterMum · 15/06/2011 11:46

You ignored him and walked away ?
Couldn't you have just stopped and said I'm not your mummy and then he wouldn't have been as upset.

JambalayaCodfishPie · 15/06/2011 11:49

I really didnt know what to do, whether approaching would make it worse/was it my place to stop - believe me, I feel bad about it now. :(

Im definately going to inform the nursery though, thanks for your replies.

OP posts:

MilkNoSugarPlease · 15/06/2011 13:02

Don't feel bad about it, you stopping could have made it worse....don't beat yourself up about it :)

But yes, contact the nursery about the NN's ....I've worked in a nursery with some nasty members of staff but manager didn't take our complaints seriously until a member of public complained

honeyandsalt · 15/06/2011 13:08

I agree, you may well have freaked him out more had you stopped. My son has been known to grab the wrong legs in a shop then become very upset when someone he thought was his mum turns out to be a stranger, it's scary for them.

The nursery staff should have distracted him, their behaviour was pretty disturbing tbh.

microserf · 15/06/2011 13:11

I would be upset by this. I would expect the staff at my nursery to come across, give the child a cuddle and gently explain that you are not mummy.

I would tell the nursery as I think the attitude of the staff sounds dismissive.

ShoutyHamster · 15/06/2011 13:17

Complain. That is NASTY - laughing at a small child in distress? They need a bollocking

TotallyLovely · 15/06/2011 13:30

Yep complain.

veritythebrave · 15/06/2011 13:42

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

YellowDinosaur · 15/06/2011 13:43

Yep another vote for complaining here too.

If my son was upset at nursery then I would expect them to behave with care and compassion not laugh at him. Totally unacceptable.

giraffesCantZumba · 15/06/2011 13:47

agree

SilveryMoon · 15/06/2011 13:50

Oh dear, that poor boy
The staff really should have tried to reassure him.
I can see how the situation could have been slightly amusing, for a brief second and in a cute, bless him kind of way, but that is awful that no one came to him.
Poor lad.
I'd also contact the nursery and inform the manager.

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