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To think that my friend is being uptight to dictate what snacks can be consumed in her house?

(181 Posts)
firemansamantha Tue 14-Jun-11 18:30:43

I have a group of friends, met through antenatal classes.

We've always met around each other's houses for a chat and catch up. The babies are all 9 months old now and been weaned a while.

Quite a few of the babies snack on raisins. This one friend has a dog(which she thanksfully locks in another room while we're there,. as I don#t want their dog around my DS).

Anyway, this one friend has a "no raisin" rule and basically refuses to let us give the DC raisins at her house. This is a right pain in the arse as DS loves them and they really get him out of bad/grumpy moods.

Friend says raisins aren't good for dogs but I just think it's rude for her to tell us what can and can't be eaten by 9 month old babies!


Alwayschanging Tue 14-Jun-11 18:33:04

Her house her rules.

tabulahrasa Tue 14-Jun-11 18:33:31

yes you are

LyingWitchInTheWardrobe Tue 14-Jun-11 18:33:36

She's right, raisins aren't good for dogs - but why can't your son have them? I'm really puzzled.

Especially since the dog is not in the room to mither for them. Did you ask for the dog to be put in the other room specifically - and do you think she might be 'paying you back' by depriving your son of his raisins?

Can you give him them before you go... or just not go?

Mishy1234 Tue 14-Jun-11 18:34:19

YABU. It's her house I'm afraid.

firemansamantha Tue 14-Jun-11 18:35:05

No, to be fair she says she always puts the dog away when DC are around.

She says that she doesn't allow raisins in the house as they get carried around and fall into nooks and crannies and the dog will find them. She has older step children and won't allow them to eat them in the house either.

tabulahrasa Tue 14-Jun-11 18:35:24

'but why can't your son have them? I'm really puzzled'

in case some are dropped on the floor, missed and the dog eats them later - I'm assuming

dexter73 Tue 14-Jun-11 18:35:37

She's being uptight for not letting you bring raisins and you are being uptight as you could always give your ds something else for the small amount of time you are at her house.

Greatdomestic Tue 14-Jun-11 18:35:58

Ah, I think she's probably worried that her dog hoovers them up once you lot have gone home.

I'm all for the "my house, my rules", as long as it's nothing too barking.

Is it really a big issue not to give your son raisins for a snack once in a while? It's not as if you are there every day. Perhaps you can reciprocate with your own house rule? grin

usualsuspect Tue 14-Jun-11 18:36:00

She doesn't sound very welcoming tbh

can't you give him a packet of wotsits grin

TidyDancer Tue 14-Jun-11 18:36:24

Yes, you are definitely being unreasonable.

I wouldn't put my dog away like she does. She sounds very accomodating tbh.

TattyDevine Tue 14-Jun-11 18:37:24

She's a little uptight. At this age its unlikely they will be all through the house without her knowing. She has a point in general, but the risk is pretty minimal in this context.

changeforthebetter Tue 14-Jun-11 18:37:54

Raisins aren't that great for kids - they get stuck in their teeth and cause tooth decay (found that out after DD had eaten a sackful in her first year blush)

Really, could you not give him something else while there? Sounds like a bit of a power tussle between the two of you. Not all antenatal friends turn out to be actual friends just people who had babies roughly the same time as you IYSWIM wink

CamperFan Tue 14-Jun-11 18:38:29

She's not telling you 'what can and can't be eaten by 9 month old babies' (what has their age got to do with it?), she's asking that you don't bring one teeny bit of food out of all th things he would eat, and I'm sure there's a reason for it. maybe you leave loads of raisins in the floor. As above, her house, her rules. Although, ironically she seems to have accommodated your wish not to have her dog "around your DS". YABU!

unfitmother Tue 14-Jun-11 18:39:24

YABU - it's not going to harm your DS to be without rasins for a few hours.
They're quite bad for teeth BTW.

AnyFuleKno Tue 14-Jun-11 18:39:37

Yabu, raisins arevthe worst. When they get smooshed into carpet, ghastly

DogsBestFriend Tue 14-Jun-11 18:40:15

She's perfectly reasonable. Raisins are toxic to dogs and can cause acute kidney failure. Why the feck should she indulge your desire to give your child something in her house which is unnecessary to your child but could kill her dog? I'm sure your child can cope for an hour or so without raisins.

howzabouthAT Tue 14-Jun-11 18:40:58


LInk here

To be honest, she can't be much of a friend if you haven't bothered to find out what the issue is and why it's a worry.

So they're only 9 months NOW - what age DOES she ban them then? I wouldn't want to be picking up dropped raisins aside from the dog issue, tbh.

create Tue 14-Jun-11 18:41:14

What changeforthebetter said

TotalChaos Tue 14-Jun-11 18:41:43

yabu, as she's just against one particular snack for a particular reason.

TeddyMcardle Tue 14-Jun-11 18:41:54

If there is a group of you and you take it in turns to meet round each others houses how often is your son inconvenienced by not being able to eat raisons for the short time you are there?
You don't even sound as if you like her.
It's her house, get over it.

DogsBestFriend Tue 14-Jun-11 18:41:58

TidyDancer, don't go there, it's been said before and causes an MN riot but I'm buggered if I'd put my dogs outside either. wink

RitaMorgan Tue 14-Jun-11 18:42:39

YABU - there are loads of other snacks you can bring, and she has a good reason to ask for no raisins.

Chandon Tue 14-Jun-11 18:43:04

you could also ask yourself:

Could my DC survive an hour without raisins?

The answer would hopefully be "yes", so yabu

anewyear Tue 14-Jun-11 18:44:07

Raisins, chocolate, grapes plus alot of other food we humans eat, can make dogs extremely unwell.

I guess the problem is with babies they tend not to have wonderful hand-eye-mouth coordination at that age and if dropped on the floor said dog may eat it, although saying that Im not sure if just one or two will harm too much?

I dont think him missing his raisins once in a while is gonna make him that unhappy, what about a nice rice cake instead? wink

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