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remeber the thread i did about the drug dealing mum outside preschool?

(27 Posts)
bubbub Tue 14-Jun-11 16:16:24

friend of a friend drug dealing by the preschool and in friends house so told friend wasnt going to do playdates anymore while druggie friend was there, but dd was really upset because she really likes her son and they are best friends.....
general advice was to cut ties.... which i did.
and report to police..... which i didnt, as the people she lives with a bloody scary, and even if she didnt know it was me, the idea of her suspecting me and sending her amassive fella round was enough to stop me.

well... i posted a bit earlier about preschool having a pretend wedding and dd was the bride... today i found out who the groom was.
yes. you guessed it. her son!
i dont believe it!!!! and other friends son is the best man!
apparently the preschool people said to dh how they are best friends, her son introduces dd as his gf and they spend every day in the corner holding hands and gigling together. so they figured they had to be bride and groom!!!!
cant believe it lol, obviously the preschool dont know so i dont blame them, but its just typical, im trying to seperate them, and they are trying to bloody marry them off!!!
we had a ten min screaming fit this afternoon after preschool because i said we were too busy (again) for a playdate with him.

i thought it would have petered out by now, ive encouraged other friendships, she isnt interested they havent had playdates for over a month, and they are still besotted!

they go to the same school together in sept and his mum has asked for them to be in same class.
still feeling bad for them, its not the kids fault! but i have to stand ground, im not going round there knowing what she has there, and i dont want her in my house as, a, she carries coke in her bag and b, we just dont get on!
still hoping they will find new friends at some point. soon!

GetOrf Tue 14-Jun-11 16:17:23

Ask her for a discount.

DollyTwat Tue 14-Jun-11 16:19:54

I'll be her friend grin

MadamDeathstare Tue 14-Jun-11 16:21:59

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

BelovedCunt Tue 14-Jun-11 16:22:55

wtf @ the preschool wedding?

usualsuspect Tue 14-Jun-11 16:23:28

Has she got any weed?

worraliberty Tue 14-Jun-11 16:26:55

So in a nutshell the kids are still mates and you're not happy?

I doubt the school will put them in the same class just because the Mum asked them to.

bubbub Tue 14-Jun-11 16:28:39

oh, did i stumble on an alternative reality where it is absolutely fine to sell drugs near a preschool, from her bag on her buggy. or in front of 2 other mums with babies. and to have huge amounts of coke and god knows what else in her house with her two young kids?
im obviously being unreasonable!
or are we going to go through the fucking boring whole "she must be a troll thing" again?
if so, i'll bow out now.

madamds, we have our first meeting at new school tomorrow so will mention it. not the drug thing, but that i feel she needs different friends.

DollyTwat Tue 14-Jun-11 16:30:27

Sorry op was only joking
Hard to stop the kids being friends however hard you try

GetOrf Tue 14-Jun-11 16:30:54

Yes agree ask the teacher if they can not be in the same class, as you would like her to make more friends.

Oh ye gods I do not miss infant school politics and mind games. It is truly easier when they are teenagers.

I was joking in my first post, btw.

bubbub Tue 14-Jun-11 16:31:00

on the form we got in the welcome pack to the school there was a form to return and a bit on the form asked if the child had any special friends that wanted to stick together to help the transition to big school go easier.
i left ours blank, she filled hers in.

bubbub Tue 14-Jun-11 16:32:36

i dont mind them being friends in school, its the constant asking for playdate together, and having to find a different excuse every day as to why we cant go round his house thats the issue. and the tantrums that then follow.

bubbub Tue 14-Jun-11 16:34:25

dolly and getorf, sorry, i got a tad bit jumped on last time and acused of trolling (apparently this is too far fetched) so im a bit defensive. blush

usualsuspect Tue 14-Jun-11 16:40:43

Sorry blush

but it is difficult to choose their friends

mathanxiety Tue 14-Jun-11 16:43:09

Call the police.

Really.

It is partly because of people like you and all the other spineless onlookers (not to mention the preschool administrators who carry on blithely indifferent to what is going on at their gates) that communities get destroyed and small children grow up in poisonous environments.

If you're not going to call the police, tell the preschool head. But you should call the police. Every one of the parents who is concerned here should call.

The question of who your child is in class with is completely not the point here.

And what is that school doing holding a wedding of three year olds????

SuePurblybilt Tue 14-Jun-11 16:44:39

Hate school weddings. Deeply creepy.

reelingintheyears Tue 14-Jun-11 16:52:36

usualsuspect...........really...how awful.

<<I prefer black.>>

bubbub Tue 14-Jun-11 17:01:54

mathanxiety i do agree, really.
that said, im not prepared to put my family in a dangerous position. she knows i dont agree with what she is doing, i stopped all contact with her when i saw her dealing just once, if she gets reported im sure she will know its me, she and her bf knows where we live, i dont know what they might do.
we have one exit, if she does something like put a firework through the door we will have no chance of escape! i know its seems unlikey, but dealing drugs in rfont of kids to me sems unlikely and she does that.
it is too risky, if we move house, i will absolutely inform them.
i dont feel good about not saying anything but i have to put my familys saftey first. even if it seems too drama queenish.

and yes i am hmm about the wedding too, there is going to be a ceremony, reception and disco and everyone has a part, bridesmaids, ushers, wedding party ect. its weird.
i

worraliberty Tue 14-Jun-11 17:07:22

Learning about weddings isn't weird and acting is a good way of teaching/learning.

Can you not have the child to play at your home?

Mumwithadragontattoo Tue 14-Jun-11 17:16:05

I think you are right to keep your daughter away from the drug dealing mum and not to let your DD have playdates at her house. However you can't punish the son for his mum. Let them be friends at school you could even have him around to yours to play if you can do it without coming into direct contact with the mum. She sounds horrid but it does sound like all the kids have a lovely friendship.

Makeminealarge Tue 14-Jun-11 17:19:09

eh, id just tell the other mum what you think! I think its cruel to stop your DD from making/keeping friends but i would be honest with the other mum, tell her you don't feel comfortable with your child going round her house etc but you would like them to remain pals. So invite the kid round yours get her to pick him up, everyones happy. Im not going to go all judgy-pants on her career choice, after all if it wasn't for the numerous buyers she wouldn't be dealing.

We reported a couple with kids living in flats across from us who were well known dealers, what did the police do? knock on the door, ask a few questions then left. Nothing more. What did they do? get a big ass dog!! What did we do? moved house!!

mathanxiety Wed 15-Jun-11 16:27:21

Are you going to report to the school then? Or the LEA?

I can't believe anyone here is seriously saying drug dealing is a 'career choice' that shouldn't be judged...

And weddings that are organised by the teachers, with a bride and groom chosen for the parts are creepy in the extreme.

risingstar Wed 15-Jun-11 18:08:03

it is really hard isnt it?

my dd had a friend whose dad was a hardened alcholic and i didnt trust him at all. i had to find all manner of reasons that she couldnt go to their house. now she is older she realises what i was doing.

its harsh but having him to play at your house would just make it worse. i would just say its lovely that they play together at school but he cant come home.

i also think that you should tell the school why you dont want them to be together in the same class

BooyHoo Wed 15-Jun-11 18:15:57

so you know someone is selling drugs outside a preschool and you haven't told the head of teh school or teh police?

not sure what to say about that really except how teh fuck can you expect the school to mind read an know your dd isn't to play with her ds if you dont tell them?

MissBetsyTrotwood Wed 15-Jun-11 18:39:54

Am I imagining things or was this thread taken down before OP as there was information in it that could identify you? I could be wrong and apologies if I am. I just seem to remember you getting upset a fair way in and wanting posts to be deleted as they were very specific.

I realise this is a really stressful situation for you but if you're concerned about identification, I'd stop posting or starting threads about it. And seek some other more confidential form of help.

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