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AIBU to think my brother could have kept my news to himself, even if he was excited on my behalf?

(15 Posts)
SenoritaViva Mon 13-Jun-11 17:27:52

So my brother came to see us and I told him I was pregnant - I also told him to tell no one as I wanted to tell my parents in person - last time we were abroad and I had to tell them over the phone.

Instead, my brother told my mum so when I did see them (they live 2 1/2 hours away so not like I can just pop over) she wasn't surprised at all as she had known for 2 weeks and it ruined the news.

Do you think it was unfair of my brother to tell my news? Mum begged me not to say anything I was initially a bit disappointed, Mum said 'oh you know X, he can't keep a secret' but I actually don't think that's much of an excuse of a 40 year old man. At the least I have learnt my lesson not to tell him anything I don't want to get out in the future...

TallulahBetty Mon 13-Jun-11 17:29:02

Very unfair! YANBU.

Nixea Mon 13-Jun-11 17:31:53

YANBU, that just seems spiteful to me. How rude and poor you.

ChitChattingagain Mon 13-Jun-11 17:33:16

YANBU to be upset, but YABU to have trusted him, as if he's 40 then surely you already knew this about him? Why on earth do you think you could trust him with something like this?

AgentZigzag Mon 13-Jun-11 17:34:09

He was being a twat, it wasn't his news to tell.

But how come you're only just learning your lesson not to tell anything now? If he's 40 he must have been like that before for your mum to say 'oh you know X, he can't keep a secret'.

SenoritaViva Mon 13-Jun-11 17:37:01

Actually I've never really had a secret to tell him before (sounds odd but I'm not that kind of person and he's 7 years older than me so we didn't share things as a teenager etc.) and I assumed since I spelt it out to him and my reason why (which I thought was quite reasonable) then he could be trusted.

You are right though that I should have known, I could have kicked myself. It ended up with DH furious as there was a lot of tedious history in it that I didn't bore you with but it all ended up a bit messy.

CowWatcher Mon 13-Jun-11 17:37:46

Same thing happened here. Except it was MIL who spilt the beans. Very annoying. Have learnt not to share (important) secrets with her.

Groovee Mon 13-Jun-11 17:53:11

Dh's grandad did the same thing but he used the wrong name and no one realised it was me until it was too late :-D

LuckyMrsT Mon 13-Jun-11 17:55:04

YANBU, that's very annoying. I would tell him that you are disappointed that he has not kept your confidence and that you won't be telling him anything first again!

TidyDancer Mon 13-Jun-11 17:58:51

YANBU. This would enrage me!

We told the whole family in very quick succession because of the threat of something like this. My family, then BIL, then the rest of DP's family. There was no real chance for anyone to spill the beans in the few hours that split the meetings!

thefurryone Mon 13-Jun-11 18:05:06

Did he tell her outright or just say something that meant your Mum guessed? I found out that one of DH's friends is pregnant before she had told him and didn't tell him outright but apparently I'm not very subtle blush so he guessed when I asked if he'd called her back as she'd left him a message a few days before.

Even if it was something like this YANBU to be pissed off but in your shoes I'd be less annoyed than if he'd just blurted it out.

LolaRennt Mon 13-Jun-11 18:05:54

yanbu. been a spate of badly behaved brothers today!

neighbourhoodwitch Mon 13-Jun-11 18:14:21

Totally bad form - so not on, news of a pregnancy is up there with getting married - what an idiot, so sorry for you x

activate Mon 13-Jun-11 18:16:38

When will people learn that people rarely keep secrets

particularly if 1) it's gossip 2) it's big life-changing news 3) it's really salacious gossip or 4) it's really really bad

I do keep secrets, but then I'm pratically perfect in every way grin

Andrewofgg Mon 13-Jun-11 23:06:14

YANBU. But please, let him redeem himself as an uncle.

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