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To enter my pin number discreetly at cashpoints, even if it offends the innocent people, of both sexes, stood behind me in the queue

(12 Posts)
heyhoplaydough Fri 10-Jun-11 18:15:59

Am I wrong / paranoid to lock my front door at night, even though I realise that I live in a safe neighbourhood, and a burglar may never walk down my road or try to open my door?

Does this mean I hate all humans? Or do I hate my neighbours?

This is also a thread about a thread. I have decided that actually to say I would not post here again was silly, as I am capable of dealing with the fact that not everyone agrees with me on every point. I can just choose to only value the comments of those adults who are able to articulate themselves without swearing or name calling.

I know I will be called a Troll for this thread - I don't care.

For those who posted comments (including those who said I was unreasonable and disagreed entirely with me) in a civil way, I would like to give you an update. I saw that I was wrong to be furious, and made it clear that my calm and considered complaint was not about any individual, but rather about my parental choices not being respected. I also made it clear that I value the input of both male and female staff at the nursery, in every aspect of care, but prefer female staff to take my daughter to the toilet. I explicated that in no way was I accusing the male member of staff of doing anything wrong other than not following my care stipulation.

The nursery manager apologised and assured me (in writing) that it is a valid parental choice, all staff are now aware of my wishes, and from now on only female staff will take my daughter to the toilet. Also, It is policy that staff are not alone with children in closed off areas at the nursery. There are windows to the nappy changing areas, and staff change babies nappies at regular intervals, two at at time.

I concede that my opinion is sexist, but that realisation is not enough to change how I feel. We all have flaws. I will try not to put myself in a position where I need to let others know how I feel about male staff taking my children to the toilet, so as not to offend anyone else. For those who made comparisons to racism - I am never racist. I cannot say how I would feel if I had a son, but I am taking that into account and will reflect upon it.

Thank you to those of you who were brave enough to say you agreed with me and put your own arguments forward. To everyone else - dust off your pitch forks and light your torches if you will - you are only a virtual lynch mob so who cares.

TidyDancer Fri 10-Jun-11 18:23:36

I still am of the opinion that you should not impose your insecurities on your DC in this way, and that you are not really protecting your DD, rather making it likely that she will grow up with 'issues' about men.

But since you don't care, I guess that won't change your actions here.


BumWiper Fri 10-Jun-11 18:26:19


OddBoots Fri 10-Jun-11 18:29:26

It would be a better analogy if you were more concerned to cover your pin if it was a man behind you and less concerned if it were a woman.

scurryfunge Fri 10-Jun-11 18:29:31

You need to let this go OP.

yousankmybattleship Fri 10-Jun-11 18:33:37

Oh good lord are you still trying to convince us you are not a loon? Maybe your time would be better spent actually listening to some of the people who replied to your other post so that maybe you don't pass your distorted views on to your poor daughter.

Flisspaps Fri 10-Jun-11 18:35:48

It's a PIN, not a PIN number, as that would be a Personal Identification Number Number. And that's just silly.

scurryfunge Fri 10-Jun-11 18:36:25

Yeah and who changes their baby at a cashpoint anyway?

yousankmybattleship Fri 10-Jun-11 18:37:24

I can't even remember my own PIN let alone someone else's. Also can't remember who last took me to the toilet.

ForeverNamechanging Fri 10-Jun-11 18:41:12

My pin is 4545 i have been known to say it out load as i type

ChasingSquirrels Fri 10-Jun-11 18:45:26

what on earth has this to do with the title of the thread????

ashamedandconfused Fri 10-Jun-11 18:46:20

would you cover your PIN if a little old lady was behind you? what about a black youth in a hoodie? Why should you make assumptions that one is more likely than the other to be "up to no good"?

the fact is you are being prejucided against ALL male nursery workers because SOME men abuse children. I take it you have heard of the female nursery worker called VG (don't know if allowed to say her name but very high profile case of nursery abuse)

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