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Issue with our neighbours, am I unreasonable?

(19 Posts)
Lotkinsgonecurly Fri 10-Jun-11 14:24:53

We live in a small village and our neighbours of our semi detatched cottages are in their 70's, very active physically but quite narrow minded.

However, We've been having an extension for the last 6 months which has dragged on but has had mininal impact as far as possible. No builders vans on their side of the house.
But we are now having central heating installed which is very noisy, but should be finished in a couple of days, so we're nearly at the end of it.

Now coincidentally our neighbours gates at the end of his drive are broken and our builder has offered to fix them free of charge when he is less busy. But the neighbours want it done now, so rather than wait for it to be done they are going to pay to have it done.

Also our communal chimney has a crack in it and is going to fall down ( it just needs repointing ) so this morning they suggested that we need to get that repaired. I said we can't afford it at the moment but we'll do it before the winter, apparently thats not good enough.

I understand they are fed up of the noise, but every time we see them its a constant moan and gripe about something. I really want to tell them to shove their chimney and shut the f**k up.

WorzselMummage Fri 10-Jun-11 14:26:57

I expect they want you to shut the fuck up after 6 months of intrusion.

ifitsnotanarse Fri 10-Jun-11 14:27:00

And breathe.....

Feel better Lotkinsgonecurly ?

MrsMellowDrummer Fri 10-Jun-11 14:29:32

We've had to have our chimney repointed recently.

I think it's one of those things that as soon as you realise it needs doing, you want it done. We were very very worried about ours falling down once we realised how unstable it was and potentially damaging the car parked underneath it, or worse, somebody walking by.

So I can understand their sense of urgency on that one. The gate maybe not so much, but then that's their choice isn't it.

The chimney didn't cost so much to repair. And if you're splitting it two ways even better. It must be frustrating for them if they see you doing loads of other work, but then postponing the one thing that affects them too.

Punkatheart Fri 10-Jun-11 14:29:36

If it is a communal chimney - surely both of you are responsible? In which case they could pay for it and then you could pay your half in winter. Is that a compromise? It is the one thing I could understand having a gripe about - it could be dangerous. But yes, they do sound as if they have too little to do - you are never going to please them fully.

Just talk to them. Your builder was kind to offer to fix their gate but they were churlish to refuse. You cannot win with some people...

altinkum Fri 10-Jun-11 14:30:21

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

HushedTones Fri 10-Jun-11 14:30:52

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MrsMellowDrummer Fri 10-Jun-11 14:32:42

Also, maybe check your home insurance. We got ours paid through on that if I remember correctly.

PaisleyLeaf Fri 10-Jun-11 14:32:58

So the problem is that they're sorting out their gate and want money towards the shared chimney repairs - now?

Maybe if you suggest that you can get it done in time for the colder weather, but if it comes down in a storm in the meantime then you'll take it on the chin and pay for a new one.

PatriciatheStripper Fri 10-Jun-11 14:34:28

I don't see that it was at all "churlish" to decline the offer. They could be waiting years for him to get round to it.

Lotkinsgonecurly Fri 10-Jun-11 14:35:59

I know the noise is going to be irritating, its SO annoying me and at least I'll see the benefits of it.

Again, I know the chimney probably won't take long to fix or be hugely expensive, its really just the principle of the thing.

Grrr, and yes I do feel better getting the rant off my chest!

They've never really liked us considering us as outsiders rather than new neighbours to have a chat with and pass the time of day with occassionally.
But, my god does the woman moan. The man is lovely. No one in the village likes them but they never make any noise and their garden is amazing. My dd picked them a bunch of flowers from their own garden, which I was dreading ( she picked by stealth I didn't see her) but they thought it was quite sweet.

PaisleyLeaf Fri 10-Jun-11 14:37:21

Sorry, what's the principle?

Lotkinsgonecurly Fri 10-Jun-11 14:38:59

No, they are insisting we pay for the chimney because apparently its our fault the chimney has a crack in it. This all happened before we had the building work done. It has a crack in it due to our log burner. The fact that they have one too, is completely beside the point.

Lotkinsgonecurly Fri 10-Jun-11 14:40:37

The principle that they are insisting we have pay for the communal chimney repairs.

PaisleyLeaf Fri 10-Jun-11 14:41:32

Oh I see. I'd assumed by the "we" that they were talking about going halves on the repair.

HerHissyness Fri 10-Jun-11 14:44:18

Buildings insurance. Worth asking!

Lotkinsgonecurly Fri 10-Jun-11 14:44:25

Sorry, am tired and keep being licked by dd. Most odd.

ddubsgirl Fri 10-Jun-11 14:45:43

6 months is nothing,had building work going on for nearly 2 yrs now at the school next to us and the new doctors surgery & library being built.
just tell them you can not afford it.

TotallyLovely Fri 10-Jun-11 14:52:41

How about you tell them you'll have the chimney fixed as soon as they hand over their share.

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