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to want to have pain-free sex with my partner?

(7 Posts)
teraspawn Thu 09-Jun-11 17:08:35

My gynaecologist has sent me back to a clinical psychologist after two years of vulval pain. I'm really really sick of this. I have cracked skin/mucous membrane over my whole vulva that bleeds and itches sometimes, and is sore and red (and no, I don't scratch it. And yes, I am avoiding getting any detergents or anything else down there, I wear all cotton underwear and have switched to hypoallergenic everything).

I don't understand why she thinks it's psychosomatic.

The last psychologist she sent me to just sent the whole time telling me I talked about sex "like a man" hmm and telling me that my openness and lack of shame about my sex life meant that I hated myself, and a bunch of other outdated misogynist made-up crap. I don't want to have to deal with that again.

I want to start ttc sometime in the next few years, so even though we do other stuff in bed, p-i-v penetrative sex is pretty much a requirement (it also happens to be my FAVOURITE THING EVER). It's been two years now and my DP is amazing in bed and it's NOT FAIR.

I'm thinking about asking to start taking amitriptylene again because it worked pretty well last time, I think. I can't remember why I stopped taking it.

AIBU to think my doctors should start trying to solve this with medicine and not just palm me off because they can't work it out? I'm going back next week and

teraspawn Thu 09-Jun-11 17:09:16

Sorry, posted too soon.

I'm going back next week and I want to be more firm about telling them I don't think it's all in my head.

LolaRennt Thu 09-Jun-11 17:12:11


If you do want to ttc though, you can always continue to do what you are doing but ask DH to finish in a cup and use the syring method. NOt terribly romantic. But if you get desperate

Hope you get the help you need though

Thingumy Thu 09-Jun-11 17:12:58

I guess your gynea has never heard of these conditions then?

Have a read OP and get yourself referred to a new gynea.


minipie Thu 09-Jun-11 17:33:34

Vulvar ezcema.

I finally had it diagnosed after nearly 2 years of various GPs barking up the wrong tree. Sounds just like what you've got.

(Or it could be lichen sclerosis possibly).

The doctor who diagnosed me was a vulvar dermatology specialist based at St Thomas's in London. Her name's Fiona Lewis. I recommend asking your GP (get a new GP first!!) for a referral to her or someone similar.

RufusTFirefly Fri 10-Jun-11 21:28:28

Hello, I'm a newbie - been lurking for a while and joined because I may be able to help the OP.

I have had vulvodynia for six years. I also have bipolar disorder. In April I started a new med for the depression part of bipolar, called lamotrigine. It was developed as a med for epilepsy and found to be of benefit for mood disorders.

My vulvodynia HAS GONE! I can hardly believe it - the relief both physically and mentally is enormous. I have found by googling that lamotrigine is being trialled for vulval pain and soreness. The med is not without problems and you have to start slowly and work up, but I have had no side effects, unlike vile amitryptiline which did not work and made me feel torpid all the time.

Your gynae and "psychologist" are both twats and your GP not much better. It has long been acknowledged that vulval pain/soreness is NOT psychosomatic! I have heard of a good gynaecologist at the Royal Free Hospital called Wendy Reid - worth changing your GP and getting a referral to her, or to Fiona Lewis? They might be able to prescribe lamotrigine or another med that works in a similar way.

I wish you well, whatever you decide. Nobody should have to put up with such a distressing condition, nor be treated so badly.

CognitiveDissident Fri 10-Jun-11 22:23:30

It could also be Behcets Syndrome.

This can cause painful lesions on the vagina/vulva.

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