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AIBU?

Diagnosed with bipolar, what happens now?

12 replies

Pumpernickel10 · 08/06/2011 20:09

Hi all
Been suffering with depression and today was diagnoised with bipolar. I'm happy I've had a answer at last as I always felt it was more than depression but what worries me is will I get worse. I'm so frightened and so is DH who doesn't really understand. DH keeps going for long walks with the dogs rather than talk to me about it. We have a 10 year old who knows I'm ill and is great. Very proud of her. It's just DH I'm worried about. AIBU to think he will get up and leave me. I've made it hard for him but I do love him and I hope he realises this. We've had this for three years.
Thanks for reading this.

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Hullygully · 08/06/2011 20:13

Pumper, it's all better from now on, now you've had your diagnosis you can get the medication you need to keep you stable. One of my bestest friends has bipolar and takes medication, she still has ups and downs, but they are minor compared to before when she could be manic or catatonic with misery. You and your dh need to educate yourselves about it, there are loads of websites and there si a bipolar society (can't remember the name) you can join and get support and info from.

It'll all be better from now, really.

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Pumpernickel10 · 08/06/2011 20:15

Thankyou. I'm reading up on it now. I've also had some information from mind too. I've printed them off so DH can see them too.

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thelittlefriend · 08/06/2011 20:18

I also have a best mate with bipolar and since her diagnosis her life is much more straightforward! She is very knowledgeable about the condition so definitely read up as much as you can. Onwards & upwards from here

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Punkatheart · 08/06/2011 20:19

You must seek all the help you can and the BOTH of you must really be part of that. Whether it be counselling, speaking to your GP or receiving general advice and support. This will get easier. He is in shock perhaps but will get over it.

I am glad that you have at last got a diagnosis - you must be relieved.

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gymbunnynot · 08/06/2011 20:20

Getting the diagnosis will really help you and will make things easier. I too am bi-polar and am on lithium which is helping. I found having the diagnosis made sense of things and it also meant they got the medication right. Anti-depressents aren't great with bi-polar.
There is nothing to be frightened of, knowing what it is and learning how your cycle works so you and those close to you know really does make it all easier.
My DH doesn't talk about it much but I know he finds me easier to live with when on meds.
I was on sodium valporate which made me feel normal, so normal that I came off them... life is easier on them.

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Pumpernickel10 · 08/06/2011 20:22

punk yes he's in shock. I have come to terms with it but DH has not.
He said he will come with me to see my CPN.

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Pumpernickel10 · 08/06/2011 20:25

gym I'm on carbamazepine and venlafaxine at the moment.
Just started on carbamazepine today.

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Ismeyes · 08/06/2011 20:44

If you have a CPN Pumpernickel, it might be worth asking them if they have any carer support workers or a carer support service. I appreciate that you probably don't consider your DH as a carer (and he probably doesn't think that himself?) but the name is misleading and they can often provide great support and information to family members. Your DH is probably scared about the future and worried about you and your DD and doesn't want to burden you with it as he thinks you have enough on your plate. This is where carer support services can be great so that he too can get some support. Alternatively, your CPN may well be happy to provide an appointment for your DH only to talk about Bipolar and your medication (they will absolutely respect your confidentiality during this), but these sorts of supports can be part of your care plan now you have a diagnosis.

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gymbunnynot · 09/06/2011 08:27

My DH came to see my Doctor with me and found it really helpful

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razzlebathbone · 09/06/2011 08:37

Hi - I was diagnosed with Bipolar two years ago. The best thing to do is find a medication which works for you. I've come off a couple because I felt ok and 'too normal' and then regretted it as I spiralled out of control. I'd also advise you to make sure you get enough sleep and go easy on alcohol. Being tired and drunk/hungover are terrible for me. Be honest, make sure people are looking out for you and your DH is a bit like mine...for people who have to live with another who has it it's hard and difficult to understand. He may need some professional advice too. My Dh and mum used to come to many of my appointments with me.

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Pumpernickel10 · 09/06/2011 12:08

ismeyes I do have a great CPN so I will chat to him about what you suggested. Had a good talk with DH lastnight and he said he was frightened but wants to be there for every appointment with me so that's encouraging. We just need time to get our heads around it but would like to thank everyone for their input

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mippy · 09/06/2011 12:31

Good luck Pumpernickel. It does make a lot more sense once you've been diagnosed, but you need to get DH involved as there might be times when you're not feeling well enough to look after your DD as well as you would like. My OH bought 'Bipolar for Dummies' when we first got together which was really useful for him.

Don't be afraid to try another drug if one isn't working. Carbamazepine made me very tired, and if memory serves it affects the Pill; sodium valproate is not a good choice if you want to conceive again as there's a strong risk of birth defects. The side effects will be hard work at first but totally worth it. Keeping an eye on drug and alcohol consumption is a good idea too, as is exercise.

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