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AIBU?

to just replace DS's Ipod Touch

54 replies

niceguy2 · 06/06/2011 08:52

DS has his 10th birthday this weekend. For his birthday I got him an Ipod Touch but because of the fact we were going on a really long drive for our holiday last week and flying on his actual birthday, I decided to give him his present early so he had something to entertain himself on the long journeys.

He's absolutely been made up with it and has been glued to it. However, last night he went out and had it in his pocket. Whilst he was playing football it came out of his jeans pocket and smashed the glass on the floor.

He's gutted and was quite tearful about it which is unlike him. Usually he'd tough it out and pretend he didn't care, not his fault etc. etc.

The ipod still works but obviously the glass is smashed. Unfortunately being a 4th gen, the glass & LCD are bonded together so replacement parts online are around £40-£50 if I wanted to have a go myself. £90 if I wanted someone to fix it for me.

Obviously a lot of money and I'm mindful that if I simply just "fix it" then he may get complacent. Plus I want to use this to teach him a lesson in responsibility. He also lost his phone last week whilst on holiday but that's only a cheap £10 phone so at the time I wasn't too fussed.

What should I do? So far my idea is to dock him 2 months pocket money and the money I would have spent today getting him a present from his sister/stepbrother could be put towards the repair/replacement. I've checked with his sister and she's ok with that as she understands what I'm trying to do.

I could replace it. Whilst the cash is annoying, it's not like I'd be struggling. But what does this teach him? Nothing. But then it is his birthday this weekend and I feel bad he's smashed it already.

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fuzzpigFriday · 06/06/2011 09:01

I like your idea - seems like a good compromise by sharing the cost. It will definitely teach him a valuable lesson.

As an aside, look into getting a case for it as well (though that wouldn't protect the screen of course)

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Pagwatch · 06/06/2011 09:02

I would tell him tough shit, he lost a phone and now broke his brand new iPod.
I would let his sister buy him snot her present and would pass his birthday with no further mention of the iPod.

I would make it absoloutely clear that if he can't be responsible then the consequence is that he loses stuff he values. I would make the cession a really hard one.

Then, in about three months I would give him the repaired/ replaced one - preferably after he has done something great like an act of kindness or a period of really good behaviour.

But you are going to repair it because you want someone to say "aw but it is his birthday" so you feel ok about it. It is what you want to do and what you are going to do. You just want permission.


Which is fine. But it absoloutely will teach him that you will bail him out and in three years time you will be posting" bloody hell - teenage son just lost another phone and expects me just to buy him another one. That is two phones and a lap top wrecked just this year"

Mark my words

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Pagwatch · 06/06/2011 09:03

Grin not "snot her present"

That would be really mean

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bellavita · 06/06/2011 09:03

You know that you are going to get the gadget police coming on saying you shouldn't have bought your 10 year old son such an item don't you... however my i-phone flew out of it's case across our wooden floor and it cracked the back - so it can happen to anybody (Apple actually replaced my phone though free of charge).

What I would do is make an appointment at the Genius Bar at an Apple Store. Take the i-pod in and just explain what happened.

When I took my phone in, I was fully expecting to pay for a new back to be put on, but they checked it out and even though it was a year old - they could see it was well looked after and they replaced it free of charge. They checked to make sure it was not water damaged and hey presto, I walked out with a new phone.

You can also ring the Apple helpline if you do not have a store near you - they will advise what to do.

Failing the above, your suggestion of the pocket money is a good one.

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tabulahrasa · 06/06/2011 09:05

Well take it to an apple store rather than getting it fixed, they'll replace it for a new iPod for, £87, well that's what apple quoted me on the phone, when I did take it in, they just gave me a new one, for nothing


Doesn't help with your parenting dilemma though, lol

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redexpat · 06/06/2011 09:08

I like the idea of the sister and stepbrother's present to him being the repair/replacement. Sometimes necessities come as birthday and christmas presents. Make it very clear that if it happens again, it wont be fixed until the following Christmas/birthday.

Excellent forward planning btw!

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niceguy2 · 06/06/2011 09:21

Actually I've already booked an appointment at the Genius bar and whilst I've heard stories of Apple being kind and replacing them for free, I certainly am not expecting them to. That said, if they said they will, I'd be a fool not to let them!

Pag, I understand what you are saying but my DD is 14 so I totally understand the trials of raising a teenager. She's got an iphone and takes extremely good care of hers and aside from the odd strop, is a model teenager. Am hoping DS turns out like her when he hits puberty.

You are right in that the ipod will be repaired. That much was clear, i never said I wouldn't. It's just a matter of how i teach the lesson.

The other thought I had was to cancel his party to pay for it but that sounds a bit harsh. Especially since he hasn't had one for two years.

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Hullygully · 06/06/2011 09:24

If you broke your own ipod/phone accidentally would you punish yourself by eg having no wine/choc/whatever for three months?

Or would you think, bum, accidents happen?

Isn't it covered under household insurance?

Accidents ARE accidents.

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bellavita · 06/06/2011 09:26

Don't cancel his party - that is harsh.

Maybe you could get him to do some extra chores around the house - he doesn't have to know that you may get the i-pod replaced for free. If that happens maybe just say that you had to put a small sum towards it....

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Hullygully · 06/06/2011 09:26
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tabulahrasa · 06/06/2011 09:29

Well DD got hers for Christmas, broke the screen about 3 weeks later, but her birthday is in April so the plan was that she'd get it replaced for her birthday so that she appreciated that it was expensive etc etc

the free one scunnered me for a bit though, lol

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LyingWitchInTheWardrobe2726 · 06/06/2011 09:33

I would actually give him the option to replace the Ipod, docking two months money, if he agrees. If he doesn't, he can keep it as it is. It's all too easy for kids to be 'upset' but see how far that upset really goes.

He lost the phone on his holiday - £10 or £100, still careless or was it an accident?

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niceguy2 · 06/06/2011 09:35

It is covered by my home insurance but by the time you deduct the excess and the potentially higher premiums next year, it's barely worth making a claim.

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Pagwatch · 06/06/2011 11:20

Hello hully -

I regularly punish myself with no wine if I break my iPod playing footie.
I hardly play at all now. I couldn't stand the sobriety.

I always gave in and felt sorry for ds1. as a consequence his iPhone has a cracked screen and his last laptop died because he never stopped charging it. Just like the last one.....
He had a party here last week while we were away and all the beds need making and the hot water seems to have been on the whole week. He is taking a group of his friends to the house in Spain in July and will probably forget to turn the gas off or leave the tv on....[sigh]

I talk a good game but am soft as shite.

As a consequence he is dippy but very lovely Grin

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Hullygully · 06/06/2011 11:25

My dc are given a certain amount of pocket money each month which they write up on a bit of scrap paper on the wall, deducting money where appropriate. In theory. I was startled to discover thier huge wealth because of course none of the deductions ever happen or indeed they say they'll do em and old muggins is so touched they have offered she says oh no darling, let me pay for that.

What are they learning? I ask you.

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Hullygully · 06/06/2011 11:26

I often play footie, but only when horribly drunk and listening to my ipod.

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Pagwatch · 06/06/2011 11:27

Grin

I do the imaginary deductions too. And I give ds1 just in case money. WTF is that all about?

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Hullygully · 06/06/2011 11:29

yy

extra money THAT THEY HAVEN'T EVEN ASKED FOR

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Pagwatch · 06/06/2011 11:33

Grin so true!





Ds1 has just done his 18th birthday present wish list. It includes a new computer and a goldfish so he isn't lonely at uni. The computer I am guessing is for the porn studying.

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Hullygully · 06/06/2011 11:33

Dd went shopping the other day to get stuff for a school trip and asked how much she could spend. We agreed a figure based on what she needed and then she looked at her wealth list and said she felt guilty so she would buy it all. So touched that there was the EXTRA MONEY again, 'because she is so lovely and generous and kind.' Oh yes.

They also take my money and buy things for their friends when they visit because "you always say how important it is to be kind and generous to people." Oh yes.

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Hullygully · 06/06/2011 11:34

Is he getting a luxury tank with every thing the modern goldfish could need?

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Pagwatch · 06/06/2011 11:35




Buying things because they are generous...
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Pagwatch · 06/06/2011 11:37

He has asked about an automatic feeder which doesn't bode well for fishy.
Still the dog is still alive after a week. Although he did have the left over pizza of about 50 teenagers..

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Hullygully · 06/06/2011 11:38

Did the house survive the party..?

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Pagwatch · 06/06/2011 11:38

My recycling is about 30 pizza boxes and about 200 bottles of becks. I expect letters from the neighbours shortly.

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