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Why is everyone so mean on mumsnet?

(439 Posts)
Orchidskeepdying Sat 04-Jun-11 10:02:40

New poster - been lurking for a few weeks. What I've noticed is that everyone is so mean. Parents/women/people come here for advice and they are torn to pieces or spelling critisied.

I feel that you all can be a little bit nicer to each other. People sometimes post to get a different opinion, but we can be nice about how we say things!

Anyway, thanks for listening - i bet someone will say something mean!

GypsyMoth Sat 04-Jun-11 10:04:29

Maybe not mean,just honest?

Orchidskeepdying Sat 04-Jun-11 10:04:51

No, not honest. Mean!

Everyone is not mean on MN. Some people are extremely kind and helpful
Have you posted something stupid and had your stupidity pointed out to you, by any chance?

BluddyMoFo Sat 04-Jun-11 10:05:33

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Gooseberrybushes Sat 04-Jun-11 10:06:14

Yes there are mean people ..they seem to need to big themselves up by making other people feel stupid.

ColonelBrandonsBiggestGroupie Sat 04-Jun-11 10:06:29

I don't think you've read many threads tbh, if that is your genuine opinion.

Gooseberrybushes Sat 04-Jun-11 10:07:05

Like SGB's comment above. You are right, there are mean people, but for pointing it out she wants to make you feel stupid.

Jajas Sat 04-Jun-11 10:08:01

There are thousands of posters on here, they can't all be mean surely? You need to stick around for a bit longer or perhaps be a bit more selective as to which threads you read. If you spend all your time in AIBU or chat then you are more likely to see the sharper side of people. You need to pick and choose carefully.

GypsyMoth Sat 04-Jun-11 10:08:38

Mean compared to where?? Which forum are you comparing us to?

magicmelons Sat 04-Jun-11 10:10:05

Because there is lots of bullies on MN who think they're clever and witty. I've been on here a long time and most of the time i like the intelligent banter but i do think they're always lots of people who take it to far. I can only assume its because they are quite repressed in their everyday life.

magicmelons Sat 04-Jun-11 10:10:41

* too far

Gooseberrybushes Sat 04-Jun-11 10:10:57

I mean there are lovely people too, but people are often unkind in a passive aggressive way, disguising it as honesty, directness or humour.

But basically it's an excuse for being unkind.

katvond Sat 04-Jun-11 10:11:07

If MN is that mean then don't come on here, yes there will be difference of opinion that's what forums are about. Sorry but whinging that's it's bad on here only shows me that you don't know how forums work, it's not all fluffy bunny rabbits and praise for the OP. Sometimes the OP will post something stupid

Primalscream Sat 04-Jun-11 10:11:11

Are you a hippy? - I'm kinda hippy.
I b/f my dc and I have a Fleet Foxes CD.

Peace and love

xx

Pingpong Sat 04-Jun-11 10:11:26

it depends where you look. There are wonderful MNers out there - antenatal and postnatal threads tend to be very supportive as does Pregnancy, General Health, Relationships and Bereavement.
Things can get a bit mean in AIBU or Baby Names but you don't have to join in!

Meglet Sat 04-Jun-11 10:11:40

The vast majority of people aren't mean.

Some people are brutally honest, better than sugar coating every response.

Wottywot Sat 04-Jun-11 10:12:47

Orchid, yes, there are some posts which can get a bit nasty and turn into slanging matches but there are also posters who ask for it! I think people just say what they think on the net, as they can let down their defenses and although sometimes it sounds harsh at least it makes you think about things in a different light.
Most of my posts (I've been on mumsnet about a year) I have had some really useful information,views and advice even if it didn't sound like what I wanted to hear at the time.

Having said that, I agree there seem to be some people who like to take things and twist them in their favour or into an argument for the sake of a few words.

katvond Sat 04-Jun-11 10:13:27

As for bullies I'm a newbie of a few weeks so not come across any. Plus anyone can be a bully behind their computer but seldom can manage it face to face.
Now let's all smile smile it's the weekend

hoovercraft Sat 04-Jun-11 10:14:19

Jesus
People are much nicer on here than they are on "B enefits r us"

reelingintheyears Sat 04-Jun-11 10:15:21

*BluddyMoFo Sat 04-Jun-11 10:05:33
Fuck off.

Oooh I make me laugh!*

Bollocks you got in first grin

slartybartfast Sat 04-Jun-11 10:16:00

you do have to be very careful what you post. people can jump on you.
it will pass grin
you will learn how to avoid/handle it

Wottywot Sat 04-Jun-11 10:16:07

Group hug (((((((((((hug))))))))))))))))

nethunsreject Sat 04-Jun-11 10:16:11

Depends, but yeah, there is meanness around.

I've had loads of help though. And a few roastings. But the good far outweighs the bad. And I prefer it here to one of the fluffy wuffy yunoyurbubshunny sites.

Jajas Sat 04-Jun-11 10:16:24

I've posted on here for 6/7 years now and no-one has ever been mean to me <yet?>. Either I'm very lucky or I don't provoke the meanies confused.

Things get heated sometimes but that is often just healthy debate.

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