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AIBU?

to be pissed off at people's attitude towards "poor people"?

111 replies

WriterofDreams · 01/06/2011 21:42

We are in the process of buying a house and of course we've been chatting about it with a few people. I'm from Ireland and I haven't lived here long so people don't know me that well. I've lost count of the number of times that people have warned me off different areas because "it's near a council estate" or "they are ex-council houses." What they don't realise is that I grew up on a council estate and my family was quite poor. The way they warn me you would think people in council or ex-council houses have a contagious disease (perhaps called "poverty"??) and that they should be avoided at all costs. Naturally this makes me feel like shit, as though if they knew where I came from they wouldn't consider me good enough.

The reason it really surprises me is that living in a council estate isn't a source of shame where I'm from. I went to school with people whose parents were millionaires, people whose parents were professionals and people who were from council estates like me. People don't tend to be segregated according to how much money they have.

As it turns out we're in the process of buying a very nice ex council house that is about twice the size of the houses in "better" areas and costs less than half the price. So I'm happy about that :) but disappointed that my "friends" clearly don't think the area I'll be living in is suitable for them :(

Is this just a southern thing?

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GypsyMoth · 01/06/2011 21:46

lol at you complaining about attitude to council estates and houses....then finishing off with 'is it a southern thing'!!

chicletteeth · 01/06/2011 21:47

Southern?
How do you know they wouldn't do this elsewhere in the country (and for the record they do)

What's being Southern got to do with it?

Gster · 01/06/2011 21:48

Yes. :-)

two of nicest most generous people i have the pleasure to know grew up in council estates.

WriterofDreams · 01/06/2011 21:48

The reason I ask about the southern thing is that's where I live at the moment so I don't know about the rest of the country. I'm moving to the midlands so I'm wondering if it might be different there.

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chicletteeth · 01/06/2011 21:48

Is being Southern better or worse than coming from a council estate?

OP, you to have made (your rather peculiar) judgment on this haven't you despite not having lived here long and not knowing many people.

chicletteeth · 01/06/2011 21:50

Right! (just saw your last post). Well so you are perhaps making misguided (at best) or perhaps downright ignorant (at worst) statements about Southerners; not dissimilar to those who judge council estate residents

WriterofDreams · 01/06/2011 21:51

I know plenty of people chicletteeth as I work with a lot of people and I have a wide circle of friends. Being southern is neither bad nor good, I didn't make any judgement on it. If you're southern it means you live in the south of England, where I live, nothing more.

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Tortu · 01/06/2011 21:51

Writer, think you might be a bit nostalgic. One of my universities was in Ireland and I'm afraid I encountered as much bigotted advice in choosing where I was to live (if not more, actually) as I have heard here.

People are just very suspicious of where they don't live.

Gster · 01/06/2011 21:51

.... I grew up in the south. In my experience, by way of it being 'moneyed' people tend to be suspicious and demonize the less well off to make themselves feel better.

WriterofDreams · 01/06/2011 21:53

I don't think I'm being nostalgic Tortu. I did find the same sort of negative attitude to poorer people in Dublin, but not where I'm from (southern part of Ireland).

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chicletteeth · 01/06/2011 21:54

Yes you did OP.
You implied that "Southerners" have a problem with council housing. Not some Southerners, or some people.
Some will, some won't
Some Northerners will, some won't!
See a theme here?

chicletteeth · 01/06/2011 21:55

p.s my mum is from the Southern part of Ireland and she is the most frightful snob

Tortu · 01/06/2011 21:55

Hmmm, maybe a city thing then, rather than a 'southern thing'?

WriterofDreams · 01/06/2011 21:55

Ok so you've answered my question chicletteeth. I'm just as likely to come up against this attitude in the midlands as I am here in the south.

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Nancy66 · 01/06/2011 21:56

I lived on a council estate as a kid - doesn't stop me not wanting to live besides one now.

WriterofDreams · 01/06/2011 21:58

Perhaps Tortu. I agree chic, there are plenty of snobs in Ireland but I'm just surprised at how often I've come up against this attitude. It's not been just a few people, practically everyone has mentioned it. This includes a whole staffroom of teachers.

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WriterofDreams · 01/06/2011 21:59

Why is that Nancy?

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chicletteeth · 01/06/2011 22:00

'Tis shocking quite frankly.
My husband is bloody posh (I'm not) and he really doesn't give a shite if you live in a shed or a stately home!

I also, don't care by the way, having had many friends as a child and now who live/d on council estates.

VforViennetta · 01/06/2011 22:01

I think there are snobs everywhere, who judge on assumptions and hoik the judgypants high, I still can't get over the person on here who thought council houses were free to live in.

MumblingRagDoll · 01/06/2011 22:01

Er.....people living in council houses are not automatically "in poverty" love.

You sound as bad as them.

BooBearBoo · 01/06/2011 22:02

My mum grew up on a council estate and she is the first one to say something like this!! She definitely would not want to live near/on one now - errr who would actually want to??!

Nancy66 · 01/06/2011 22:02

Council estates tend to bring crime - esp in cities.

The ones in London also have lots of gang problems.

thing is in London it's impossible to NOT be near a council estate but I def wouldn't want to be very close to one.

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WriterofDreams · 01/06/2011 22:04

That's why I said "poor people" mumbling. I grew up on a council estate so I know that not everyone in council houses is "in poverty" - the inverted commas were to reflect the attitude of the people I've talked to, not my attitude. Should have made the clearer, sorry.

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BooBearBoo · 01/06/2011 22:04

Agree with Nancy. But then I did grow up in London so that is maybe why my view is as such...

WriterofDreams · 01/06/2011 22:06

Ah so perhaps council estates are a lot worse here then, that would explain it and make me feel a lot better frankly as it would mean my friends were somewhat justified in their prejudice. The estate I grew up on was lovely, really friendly and I had great neighbours. My parents still live there and don't ever want to move.

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