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to hate people asking if I have lost weight.

(18 Posts)
messybessie Wed 01-Jun-11 16:15:11

I haven't. I'm a size 16.

I really aggravates me because they are either saying
- what you are wearing makes you looker thinner than that other thing
- they are assuming I must be on a diet, given my size, and therefore it must be the right thing to say.

One person has said it to ms everytime I havenseen her for the past 2 years. I am exactly the same size.

I'm not particularly happy with my size so am maybe over-sensitive but it upsets me.

Lainey1981 Wed 01-Jun-11 16:18:11

Happens to me a lot. If i really had lost weight every time they said, I would be a size 4

katvond Wed 01-Jun-11 16:31:18

I would take it as compliment,they are saying it as they think you look good and you have lost weight. I think YABVU
Nothing wrong with being a size 16,I am a 14/16 if someone asked me if I had lost weight and looked thinner I would love it.

newbroom Wed 01-Jun-11 16:34:20

I have a friend who always says this - at first I was quite flattered, but then realised it must be her stock compliment/ice breaker as she's been saying it for 2 years and I've gained at least 2 stone in that time blush

Yukana Wed 01-Jun-11 16:35:36

If I knew they were on a diet and working hard to lose weight, and I had noticed they had lost weight, then I would say so. For example, my mother is on a diet, working hard at it and when I notice she's lost weight I tell her. I also tell her if she looks nice in something. smile

If I didn't know they were on a diet, knew they were extremely sensitive about their weight or knew there was either a possibility or they did/do have an eating disorder, I would quite frankly keep my mouth shut unless asked for an opinion.

breathing Wed 01-Jun-11 17:28:59

I get this. Usually when Ive put weight ON, which is weird.
I always think they must think of me as even fatter and then when they see me, it doesnt match their image.
Its pisses me off and now I lie and say yes even though I havent.

foreverondiet Wed 01-Jun-11 18:01:03

I think its because people think its nice to praise people / give compliments, so people say it as they think its a compliment. She probably says it to everyone.

Try not to be sensitive about it.

AlpinePony Wed 01-Jun-11 18:02:59

YANBU. I hate it when people make a comment on my weight - I am more than a number on the scales. sad It REALLY pissed me off when I lost 8 stone and people changed their attitudes towards me, I was still me - just in nicer clothes. <shrugs>

redexpat Wed 01-Jun-11 18:43:41

You look lovely smile

I hate it when people comment on weight, size. They just make assumptions. All. THe. Time. Like if you are skinny then all clothes fit and suit you. Also that you don't mind people commenting on your weight. Are you my GP? No. Is it any of your business? No.

When I'm feeling less hormonal than I am now I tell myself that they are trying to compliment and I should take it as such.

faverolles Wed 01-Jun-11 18:49:45

YANBU Someone says this to me when I clearly haven't lost any, but they think the compliment will kickstart me into making an effort to lose weight, because obviously it bothers them, and of course it's their business hmm

AurraSing Wed 01-Jun-11 18:51:48

My mother says this to me every time I see her. As in "your sister is still nice and trim and her hair is immaculate, as always. Have you lost weight?".
I'm chuffed to bits if anyone else says it, but not my mum!

PatriciatheStripper Wed 01-Jun-11 18:56:10

I'd rather they said that to me than the other stock compliment/icebreaker which is

"You look well"
Translation: "You've been at the pies again"


Librashavinganotherbiscuit Wed 01-Jun-11 18:57:02

I used to get this all the time, and like you if I had really lost all the weight they told me i had I would be a size zero. I came to the conclusion as I am quite outgoing plus quite tall people tended to remember me as bigger than I really was. Only explanation I could think of. It's bloody annoying so YANBU.

Spagbolagain Wed 01-Jun-11 18:57:40

YANBU. When I show my (skinny) sister a new outfit she always says, ooh lovely and it's very slimming. Like that must automatically be my top criteria, to look slimmer, it must mean the item is a success.
She is otherwise lovely, but this annoys me.

ThisIsJustASagaNow Wed 01-Jun-11 18:59:38

Yes I feel awkward too. It's embarassing if you haven't and embarassing if you have. I lost quite a bit once and subsequently put a bit back on. I don't really want to discuss it tbhhmm

Twinkiesmum Wed 01-Jun-11 19:04:56

Alpine Pony - how long did it take you to lose 8 stone? (Well done, by the way!)

activate Wed 01-Jun-11 19:06:30

I always say "you just remember me being really fat"

ThisIsJustASagaNow Wed 01-Jun-11 19:07:59

I never mention weight to people.

I might say 'hey you look great, I like what you're wearing', or ' I love your new hairstyle'. I steer well clear of weight.

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