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to be clueless as to how to proceed with toilet training problems?

(5 Posts)
GrownUpNow Mon 30-May-11 17:48:24

DD is three in two weeks time. I tried day time potty training her when she was about 2.4yrs and she did pretty well, picked it up within a fortnight or so and was dry for another few weeks. Then she stopped trying, started wetting clothes and just going where she stood. It was not long before Christmas, so I decided that rather than stressing, that she wasn't ready obviously, so put her back into nappies and decided I'd start again when she showed she was ready.

A couple of months ago, I think probably March, we just slid into trying again. She was very resistant but also aware of urges to go and able to speak and communicate that need, plus able to climb on and off the toilet. It was a bit of a battle, she can be very stubborn and I think she just got it in her head that she didn't want to use the toilet for mummy. She'd do it fine for others, so I just kept quietly encouraging and eventually a sticker chart was introduced and used for about a month.

She was dry daytime and so I started night time. She's done pretty well, maybe an accident two times a week, usually if she's gone to bed late and not done a wee first, or in the early hours where she just hasn't quite made it to waking up time.

Sorted, or so I thought. It started a week ago that DD wanted help with trousers and lifting onto the toilet. It's progressed to wetting pants, pooing on the carpet and peeing just before she gets to the toilet because she seems to be dallying rather than going straight there. We're back here again and I don't know what to do, I don't want to stop again, because she knows what she is doing. Why has she stopped and how do I deal with it? DS regressed once when his sister was born and that took a little tweak and he was back to normal.

I've told her the school won't take her if she isn't going all her wee wees and poo poos in the toilet, but she goes once and then is back to accidents again. AIBU to not have a clue what to do now?

TattyDevine Mon 30-May-11 17:56:45

If I were you I would do zero reaction (as close to zero as you can) at any accidents, simply change her and move on. Don't go back to nappies, don't react, don't go on about it, try a "am I bothered" approach to it and see how it goes.

I suspect its become a bit of a game for her.

chipmonkey Mon 30-May-11 18:02:05

Agree with Tatty. We did this in the end with ds1. It did work.

cookielove Mon 30-May-11 18:15:43

Yes i agree it sounds like a game, you could also take a try taking her to the toliet average it out when you think she most likely will need to go, she may complain that she doesn't need it but take her anyway. It may be a hassle but she'll soon learn that if she doesn't want to be made to go to the toliet then she can herself when she needs it.

GrownUpNow Mon 30-May-11 18:17:48

I used to do this when she was first learning, take her every time I needed. I think I may do the zero reaction to accidents coupled with the taking her every so often to go. Hopefully she'll get the message.

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