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to put 2.5yo DD in a high chair in a restaurant

(117 Posts)
Amateurish Mon 30-May-11 17:28:59

Whenever we go out as a family to a restaurant, I always put DD in a highchair. She probably could use a normal chair but it might be less comfortable for her with the height of the table and it makes life easier for us as she stays put.

Reason for question is that we went for sunday lunch yesterday, booked in advance including a high chair. Part way through meal, a woman asks quite abruptly that we give her the highchair as our DD is quite old enough to sit on a normal chair. The cafe has run out of highchairs apparently and her granddaughter (about 1.5 I'd guess) is on her father's lap. We I refuse to turf DD out of said highchair, she accuses us of being selfish and storms off.

My initial thought was that she was being rude and U. On further thought, now wondering if DD is indeed too old for highchair.

MN jury?

worraliberty Mon 30-May-11 17:31:52

I think the restaurant should make under 2's a priority really and provide booster seats if you can't take one yourself.

itisnearlysummer Mon 30-May-11 17:33:55

YANBU.

You booked the highchair in advance. It's not for anyone else to decide whether or not you needed it.

Indith Mon 30-May-11 17:34:00

My dd is 2 and a half too and still uses a highchair or booster because as you say, she can't really reach the table properly without one (at home she sits on a high chair rather than a highchair if that makes sense, no leg bits or straps). I think I'd be rather miffed at how rude the woman was but I would probably have given the highchair as dd would manage without but their dd definitely couldn't.

supadupapupascupa Mon 30-May-11 17:34:06

first come first served. fair enough to ask, very rude to comment after you said no.

choceyes Mon 30-May-11 17:34:29

YANBU and also YABU

YANBU cos - I have a 2.5yr old DS and like you life would be easier if he was in a high chair as he constantly keeps running away if he sits in a normal chair.
But we have a 9 month old DD too, so we always end up with DS in a normal chair as I don't want to use up two high chairs, and also as DS should be able to sit in a normal chair at his age.

YABU as in your position I would have immediately offer to give up the 2.5yr olds high chair to the other child as she needs it more.

lockets Mon 30-May-11 17:34:29

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

irregularegular Mon 30-May-11 17:34:40

I don't think your DD is too old for a highchair. Like you say, it is easier. But I do think the other family needed it more, so you probably should have let them have it. Maybe the restaurant could have found your daughter a cushion or something to lift her up?

choceyes Mon 30-May-11 17:34:56

ah if you had booked the high chair then YANBU

Punkatheart Mon 30-May-11 17:35:10

I understand why you use the highchair but if a younger child needed it, you really should have given it up. I used to take a booster seat. A 2.5 year old really does not need a highchair...

Indith Mon 30-May-11 17:35:15

A slightly different point though I hate with when restaurants run out of highchairs, it isn't hard or expensive to have a good stash of booster cushions.

debka Mon 30-May-11 17:36:15

No, I don't think YANBU, however in that situation I may have given the woman the highchair if she'd asked nicely. If she'd been arsey then I wouldn't.

My 2.2 yo DD sometimes goes in a highchair, sometimes in a chair.

lockets Mon 30-May-11 17:37:24

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

pirateparty Mon 30-May-11 17:38:42

I assume you said no because of the way she asked? Because otherwise I would say that, having a 2.5 yo myself, I'd have said yes immediately because he can sit at a chair and either kneel/ sit on a cushion etc. And you wouldn't expect an 18 month old too.

I occasionally put ds in a highchair if we're out, but I wouldn't think it necessary and I think a younger child would supersede his need for it.

So, yes I'm afraid I think YABU on this occasion.

Amateurish Mon 30-May-11 17:39:55

Interesting mix of views. Two extra bits of information: we knew they were short on highchairs having suffered w/o highchair on a previous visit, hence the booking. Also, we had a second highchair for DS (10 mo).

WhoAteMySnickers Mon 30-May-11 17:40:17

YANBU. You had booked a high chair, she hadn't. Tough.

GwendolineMaryLacey Mon 30-May-11 17:40:36

First come first served but I can't see why a child of that age needs a high chair. The sooner they learn to sit properly the better and 2.5 is plenty old enough to know how to sit.

cunexttuesonline Mon 30-May-11 17:41:01

My DS is still in a highchair (2.3yo), it says on the back of it that it's for 6mo - 3years! The reason I keep him in it are for the same reasons that you stated - can't reach the table otherwise and keeps him contained!

cherryburton Mon 30-May-11 17:41:49

My son is very nearly three but I put him in a high chair last week in a restaurant where the table seemed very high (or the chairs very low) and he couldn't reach very well. He's not been in one for ages but to be honest, it was great, kept him under control during his meal and no one had to chase him and stop him from doing daft things.

So, YANBU, especially as you booked the chair! She sounds rude and arsey.

Gastonladybird Mon 30-May-11 17:41:50

Given you'd booked it and way she asked yanbu. Dd bit older but still needs a booster or highchAir as if she cant reAch table she doesn't really eat.

worraliberty Mon 30-May-11 17:42:14

Why don't you buy a booser seat? You're going to have to sooner or later or you'll have to grease your child to get them in and out.

Amateurish Mon 30-May-11 17:42:39

pirateparty I think I may have said no even if she had asked nicely. My immediate reaction was that DD need was equal to any other child. However, on later reflection I did question this. And now the MN posts are making me think that my gut reaction was wrong.

worraliberty Mon 30-May-11 17:43:07

Or a booster seat blush

skybluepearl Mon 30-May-11 17:43:08

if i was asked rudley i'd say no too. if my child could just about manage without and i was asked nicely i would give up high chair despite prebooking.

colditz Mon 30-May-11 17:43:12

I'll go against the grain here and say that you were selfish, whether you booked it or not. A 2.5 year old of average height and ability can kneel on a chair and eat perfectly well. An 18 month old cannot. I'd have handed it over to the other family.

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