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To have high expecations of myself as a furture mother.

(276 Posts)
Liby Mon 30-May-11 10:13:26

I am planning to
-not use dummies
-not let my kids eat junk food
-no disney
-no barbies/bratz
-extra homework most evenings
-chidren will learn another language
-same with musical instrument
-computer games/tv etc limited to weekends
-to grow vegetables with my DC
-take them to museums regularly
-read with them/to them everynight
-cook with them regularly
-To say no and mean no and have high expecations of behaviour at all times.

probably loads more. Im I being unreasonable??

AuntieMonica Mon 30-May-11 10:14:43

is it too early for popcorn?

PacificDogwood Mon 30-May-11 10:15:25


Tee2072 Mon 30-May-11 10:15:27


Do you have any children yet?

JoinTheDots Mon 30-May-11 10:15:49

Nothing wrong with being optimistic! YANBU

Just don't be hard on yourself when DC3 is crying to be fed and DC2 begs you to put on CBBC and you give in... even though it's not the weekend.

Gastonladybird Mon 30-May-11 10:15:50

Yanbu to want to do these things but it may turn out that things font pan out that way as kids have own ideas (eg may refuse to learn an instrument or may br premature and use of a dummy be suggested to help breathing).

cricketballs Mon 30-May-11 10:15:52

I remember thinking that....lasted about 2 hours after the first birth!

But on a serious note, just be careful about your expectations so when you fail (as we all do) then you don't feel to down on yourself and feel like a failure

Goblinchild Mon 30-May-11 10:15:56

YWBU if you beat yourself up and feel that you have failed if you don't manage all of your list all the time. Nothing wrong with high expectations if you are prepared to adapt along the way.
e.g my son can't learn another language.

SnuffleTurtle153 Mon 30-May-11 10:16:26

Nope. I'm in.

<Hands popcorn to AuntieMonica>

<Polishes glasses>


Gastonladybird Mon 30-May-11 10:16:35

No tee she doesn't

MsInterpret Mon 30-May-11 10:16:51

You can have those aims and hopes...nothing wrong with that.

But don't beat yourself up when/if they don't happen.

And don't judge others who don't think the same way as you.

Sirzy Mon 30-May-11 10:17:02

Having high expectations is fine, as long as you don't get upset when it doesn't happen.

What if they don't want to play an instrument?

MerylStrop Mon 30-May-11 10:17:10

YABU if you think those are the things that make a good parent

expatinscotland Mon 30-May-11 10:17:19

half-term begins . . . .

Serenitysutton Mon 30-May-11 10:17:44

I'm not sure I understand the post- You can do what you like. Why tell everyone about it? Do you just want them all to say "wait till they get here you'll change your mind" why? You can do all those things if your determined enough and aren't concerned about involving your childrens needs in decison making. It's your life, your kids. Get over yourself.

AuntieMonica Mon 30-May-11 10:17:45

and it's raining..... hmm

better make another pot of coffee

peppapighastakenovermylife Mon 30-May-11 10:18:05

This is a wind up right?

If not, um, good luck...

bbbbob Mon 30-May-11 10:18:11

No you are most definitely NBU. I also had high expectations.
Then I became a parent grin

MollieO Mon 30-May-11 10:18:13

Ha, ha. I'd add teaching them to spell correctly to your list!

MorticiaAddams Mon 30-May-11 10:18:24

You can plan all you like but as you have no idea of the personalities of your future children are you planning to force your ideas on them regardless of whether it makes them miserable?

Being a great mum is not all about planning and doing all the time and having a pj day and snuggling with a Disney DVD can be the best day of all.

DontCallMePeanut Mon 30-May-11 10:18:26

What MerylStrop said... It's childhood, not a fascist regime...

NorthernGobshite Mon 30-May-11 10:18:55

Wind up or seriously deluded!

SnuffleTurtle153 Mon 30-May-11 10:19:16

'to grow vegetables with my DC' grin

I think you have too much to think about.

Goblinchild Mon 30-May-11 10:19:40

Did Tiger Mother woman write a book?
You could put it on your Christmas list.

haudyerwheesht Mon 30-May-11 10:19:52

Yanbu good luck to you for most of it but tbh you seem to have very high expectations of your future kids (language/music etc) which may be unreasonable depending on the kid.

Also you're putting a lot of pressure on yourself.

I hate dummies - ds didn't have one despite not sleeping until he was 3 but dd has one because it soothes her reflux - what would you do in that situation then?

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