To not treat DS during next week's school holiday?

[HeartBurnQueen]

I have two DS's and my eldest has this week being hosting an exchange student. They have had lots of fun including town and lunch on Sunday, Guild Hall visit and cinema yesterday and last night, York today, bowling tomorow night and a meal out on Friday night. It's costing me a fair bit!! DS2 hasn't done anything all week so I have said during the holiday next week I'll treat him to cinema, the farm, KFC and a seaside visit. AIBU to not take DS1 as he's had lots of treats this week? I mean he won't want to do cinema again anyway as we're seeing the same film as he saw but he'll feel left out of the KFC and farm thing probably. Don't know what to do for the best as DS2 is feeling really left out this week.

[Numberfour]

It seems to me that taking DS2 and not DS1 is almost a punishment to DS1 for hosting the student! He has not done anythng wrong.

While it may seem fair to try to make up to DS2 for what he has missed out on this week, I think it is petty to exclude DS1 just because he had a busy time this week.

YABU.

[Sirzy]

Sounds a bit mean to leave him out of things tbh.

If he doesn't want to go to the cinema play that up as the big treat for ds2 and then carry on as a family as normal.

[Onceamai]

DS1 will feel left out next week if you don't include him and DS2 will have forgotten by then. They will both remember the unfairness of leaving out DS1 in the holidays and actually if the exchange visit has gone well DS1 is to be applauded because so often they are really tough weeks. In the fullness of time DS2 will have an exchange student so it will all work out fairly in the end.

[Bogeyface]

It depends.

did DS2 join in with the activities and treats that you had this week? If not, then no YANBU because you can explain to DS1 that he had his treats this week so next week is his brothers turn.

If DS2 did tag along then YABU to leave his brother out.

[Goblinchild]

Surely DS2 will get his chance to host an exchange student in the future?
Not fair to leave DS1 out of your half term plans, did he know that was going to be the deal when he hosted the student? Isn't hosting a support to his language studies?

[HeartBurnQueen]

Yes you're right, I did think it seemed mean to wave DS1 goodbye at the door when I'm treating DS2, I mean - it's a good thing that he's done this exchange isn't it? and all the money I've spent has come out of the school fund I save up anyway. I'm hoping DS2 gets to do an exchange in a couple of years :)

Ok so I'll treat DS2 to cinema and KFC on the same day next week and explain to DS1 that it's his brother's big treat for the week and then the rest of the stuff we'll all do together.

[Goblinchild]

That sounds fair.