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AIBU?

To say to DP who is the full-time wage earner this is what u are getting and that's that

139 replies

shinyshoes · 08/05/2011 23:34

I work 3 evenings a week.

DP works full -time and is the main wage earner.

I put into the household pot but obviously DP's wages covers the majority of the bills.

I work when he is at home, I work my shifts around him, there is always one of us at home.

We have 3 children. I cook mostly when I can. I use the slow cooker but sometimes DP has to see to their meals.

There was a recipe on here a couple of weeks back, cheesy champs and beans, it sounded very nice and very filling and I thought my children would love it. Tomorrow I was thinking of having that or chilli prawns with salad leaves.

DP has expressed his disgust on both meals citing 'where's the rest' steak/sausage/meat of some sort.

I don't want to cook every night. I'd like to have just hot pastrami on rye, or prawns in chilli dip.

As he works full-time and comes home like he could eat one of us. AIBU to say 'listen I dont want to cook, like the cheesy champs or cook for yourself!'

The children would love dippy or easy to eat food

What do u do if u just can't be bothered but feel you have to

OP posts:

Report

TheMitfordsMaid · 08/05/2011 23:38

I work part-time and my husband full-time, but he cooks in the evening for us all. My in-laws think he is very hard done by but I do everything else in the house.

hudspur · 08/05/2011 23:39

I agree with your DH neither of those meals have my mouth-watering to be honest, although you could suggest he cooks instead.

RobynLou · 08/05/2011 23:40

he can like it or lump it imo, unless he has a specific allergy/moral objection to the food.

you're not running a restaurant!

FourFingeredKitkat · 08/05/2011 23:40

Sorry, doesn't sound like a meal, more of a snack. If you're going to do a job, do it properly as my dad told me as a young un.

HalfPastWine · 08/05/2011 23:42

What RobynLou said ...It's not a restaurant.

Yes, it must be lovely to come home to a cooked meal when you work full time but just because you're there doesn't mean you HAVE to cook for him every night.

shinyshoes · 08/05/2011 23:46

GREAT !! Thanks gals I will show him this thread.

Not that he'll be convinced.

But within 1/2 hour of moaning about the lack of food i've dished up and how 'I work all day and i'm starving' he'll be in the fridge moaning there's nothing to eat.

The children have a balanced diet and we eat well. But I can't be bothered with the whole, meat, potato, veg meal EVERY night. sometimes I just want pasta

OP posts:

BrawToken · 08/05/2011 23:48

I'd just let him get his own dinner tbh. I always make sure the kids are fed, but if dp doesn't like it, he can piss off get a sandwich. We both work ft, but I normally cook as I am better at it. He does other things like baths, stories and putting away washing.

shinyshoes · 08/05/2011 23:52

he came home for lunch today and hung around the living room. When I mentioned I couldn't do him lunch because I was busy perparing a roast dinner for when he came home he looked at me like i'd handed him a japenese yen !

OP posts:

foreverondiet · 08/05/2011 23:58

I don't know what cheesy champs are, but I think he is being a little U.

Can you not come to a compromise eg make the chilli prawns and leaves but also cook him a large portion of rice to go with it. Or make the cheesy champs and also poach him a piece of salmon. Another good compromise is to make shepherd's / cottage pie / lasagne etc in individual dishes and freeze. When you fancy eating something he wouldn't like you just take one out and pop into oven.

On a slightly different note, its not healthy to eat meat every day, has been stuff in the news about this. I don't cook every night, sometimes DH has sandwiches / cereal and I have a salad. DC are little they eat earlier and their dinner is light as they have meat meal at lunchtime at school.

BrawToken · 08/05/2011 23:59

That's weird! Presumably he fed himself before you met?

shinyshoes · 09/05/2011 00:07

absolutely he fed himself, his meals were meat or fish based.

cheesy champs are.

mashed potato with cheese mixed in and beans on top

I could make him salmon/shepherds pie/cottage pie etc, but the idea is to get him eating simple meals sometimes and not make it meat based otherwise i'd just add a little more meat for all of us and it would defeat the object of cooking a proper meal for us

OP posts:

BrawToken · 09/05/2011 00:09

Oh. Sorry, I thought you meant he was put out because you wouldn't cook for him when he came home for lunch.

shinyshoes · 09/05/2011 00:10

or rather a simple 'can't be bothered' meal

OP posts:

shinyshoes · 09/05/2011 00:11

yes that as well Braw

OP posts:

HalfTermHero · 09/05/2011 00:15

I would just tell him to Fuck off, to be honest. I'll dance to my own fucking tune, thank you very much.

cat64 · 09/05/2011 00:16

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

HipHopOpotomus · 09/05/2011 00:19

He's not 3 - ge can always make something for himself?!?

DP likes meat with everything - I'm happy to eat a virtually veggie diet. I've ended up eating more meat and dp hs slowly widening his reportoire.

shinyshoes · 09/05/2011 00:22

yes Cat we both work.

I work part-time around DP's shifts who is fulltime.

I take the responsibilty for the full time running of the house/ kids/clubs/shopping/cleaning/ ironing (I get this sent to a shop) I'm at home 4 days a week so I do this. His jobs for the week is hoovering throughout the house once a week and putting the bins out for the binmen on Tuesdays.

Halftermhero. i just spat my wine out lol

OP posts:

AnyFucker · 09/05/2011 00:27

I don't understand why you are worrying so much about your husbands diet

he is a grown man

young children, I get it...you are responsible for them

you are not responsible for him...if he don't like it, he can lump it

caramelwaffle · 09/05/2011 00:33

Are your children healthy?

That is the main priority

everything else is "gravy"

hth

HalfTermHero · 09/05/2011 00:39

AnyFucker- Did I mention that I love you :-) xx >

AnyFucker · 09/05/2011 00:40

oh, HTH, I didn't know you cared

I have had a few too

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ElephantsAndMiasmas · 09/05/2011 00:46

Er YADNBU. The fact that he gets paid for more days work than you do (as you both clearly work full time between job and lookingg after kids) does not mean he is your owner or that you are his employee. Therefore he doesn't get to decide what you do. He can ask you, or offer to cook, or look after himself, but when it comes down to it he is a grown up who can feed himself what he likes when necessary.

HalfTermHero · 09/05/2011 00:48

Oh but I do! I am actually downstairs or else I wil rape dh for baby no. 4. He has gone to bed whilst I work it off on MN, lol . >

AnyFucker · 09/05/2011 00:49

blimey, HTH, what are you on ?

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