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To ask what time your children go to bed?

(95 Posts)
SacreLao Tue 26-Apr-11 13:47:05

I have 2 children, DS is 6 years old and has special needs, DD is 8 years old and a typical little girl.

They go to bed together at 7.30 pm and have done for a few years. At the weekend or in school holidays my DD will stay up a little later and go bed around 8.00pm sometimes 8.30pm. She gets about half an hour reading time in bed after this and then it's lights out. DS really needs his sleep so goes bed at the same time as always.

Anyway I thought this was a pretty reasonable time for their ages but DD had a friend sleep over at our home last night and when chatting to her mum she told me that her DD goes bed at 9pm on school nights and 10pm at weekends and holidays. This seems really late to me!

Anyway I allowed both my DD and friends DD to stay up until 10pm last night thinking that DD would have fallen asleep by then, was very surprised that not only did she stay awake until 10pm but that she woke up as normal with no problems at 8am this morning.

Am I sending her to bed too early?

What time do you send your 8/9 year old's to bed?

iamamug Tue 26-Apr-11 13:49:53

8pm is bedtime but my DS will read until he falls asleep. (I did too at his age)
That's a school night time - bit more flexible in holidays or at weekends.
Never have a problem with him waking up late - 7am pretty much on the dot.
He is nearly 9.

OTTMummA Tue 26-Apr-11 13:51:19

I think as a one off, you won't see much difference.
Try it for a week, grin i bet you won't be questioning yourself then.

My 3yr old goes to bed at 7-7.30pm, he is up at 7 the next morning.

I think at 8 they should be in bed at 7.30, but maybe give her 30mins reading, then 8pm lights out.
I was going to bed at 9 when i was 12-13, and 10pm at 14-15.

Kids do need a lot of sleep.

Danthe4th Tue 26-Apr-11 13:51:24

My 6 year old is in bed for 7.30/8 on school nights, my 8 nearly 9 year old stayed up till 9pm last night watching springwatch but usually he goes at 8.30.
They used to both go at 7.30 but since the clocks have changed my older son wants to stay up and have a bit of quiet time with us.
10pm is late and absolutely fine occasionally but mine would be vile if we did it often.

donnie Tue 26-Apr-11 13:51:32

DD1 is nearly 10; she rads for half an hour and light are out at 8.30/45.

DD2 is nearly 6 and lights are out at 7.30/45.

Bucharest Tue 26-Apr-11 13:52:29

Dd is 7.5 and goes at 8. She gets up at 7.20.

TheDogsBollocks Tue 26-Apr-11 13:53:12

no bed time. It causes too much hassle. They go when they are tired.

Bramshott Tue 26-Apr-11 13:56:08

DD1 is 8 and goes to bed between 8 and 8.30 with reading time until 9.00. Until a few months ago we were trying to get her to go to bed earlier, but she's not up early (8.00) and that is all the sleep she needs. She goes to sleep very easily at 9pm when before she was struggling.

I do reserve the right not to have her downstairs after 8pm though - if it's been a busy day, I can be all done with parenting by that time! If it's been a more relaxed day then I will sometime play a game with DD1 between 8 and 8.30.

She does get bathed and into her pajamas at 7.30, the same time as DD2 though.

RtHonLadyEuphemiaOfCaledonia Tue 26-Apr-11 13:56:29

I'm going to try 8pm for my 8 year old DD. She's a grump at night and a grump in the morning - I'm aware we've let the bedtime routine slip recently.

She breaks my heart with her nastiness every morning: something needs to change!

Do you read your kids a bedtime story still? That's become a flashpoint as DD and I are too tired by that time and her behaviour is shocking. I'm thinking no more being read a story: she can sit and read herself.

Carrotsandcelery Tue 26-Apr-11 13:56:35

Mine are 10 and 6 and both go to bed at 7.30. We read to them so by the time they are left it is usually about 8pm. They are allowed to read or listen to story CDs if they can't get to sleep but they are generally asleep very quickly.

They are both early risers though, no matter when I put them to bed.

MadamDeathstare Tue 26-Apr-11 13:57:33

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MadamDeathstare Tue 26-Apr-11 13:57:48

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

SacreLao Tue 26-Apr-11 13:58:07

Thanks everyone.

Think i'm doing ok then as she has the same bed time as most others, with reading time she dosn't actually go to sleep until 8 - 8.30pm which with a 7am wake up gives her around 10.5 hours sleep.

Going to google how much sleep they need actually as don't know that either.

lorelilee Tue 26-Apr-11 14:00:17

Genunine question Dogs - how do you get 'me' time?

monkeyjamtart Tue 26-Apr-11 14:00:39

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

JustCallMeGrouchy Tue 26-Apr-11 14:03:57

dd is 8 and bed between 7.30 and 8pm depending what shes been like ibn the morning she often reads for up to 30 mins

Monkey I think we have the same kid!!!

I was too ashamed to answer this thread shock as bedtime on our house is a complete nightmare!!!

I put it down to crap parenting and not nipping it in the bud when he was a baby although I have to say he doesnt go as late as your DSS. I have got to the stage now where if DS is asleep say by 10 then we have done well (he is almost 9). Like you, DH and I dont seem to get any alone time and it is frustrating - apart from this my DS is the best kid ever xx

DialsMavis Tue 26-Apr-11 14:07:16

Ds 8 goes to bed at 7.30ish and can read until 8pm on school nights, he wakes between 7and 8 am. On weekends he stays up until 9 or 10pm if I feel like letting him and he behaves- he rarely sleeps in much later anymore though

DialsMavis Tue 26-Apr-11 14:08:27

DS (8) rather than DS8-yikes!

susall Tue 26-Apr-11 14:12:00

Dd and Ds2 are 4 and go anywhere between 6.30 and 7.30 at the latest or they end up being grumpy and difficult the next day. Ds1 is nearly 10 and goes around 8/8.30 unless he is at BB's or its the weekend. They get up at 6.30/7am regardless of when they get sent to bed so we aim for it to be as early as possible.
SIL has no set bedtime for her 3 and mumps she never has any time to herself and that the kids are always tired, one day she will put 2 and 2 together. She thinks its cruel of us to have them in bed so early but it works for us so we will keep bedtimes as they are untill they are older.

Insomnia11 Tue 26-Apr-11 14:13:48

DS1 (5) - we start bed time routine at 7.30pm with the idea that she is asleep by 8.30pm, which she is, mostly. She gets up at 7.30am.

DS2 (2) - used to be in bed by 7pm until recently but she is being a little monkey since she has been in her own bed and gets out of bed twenty times so is going to sleep by about 8pm and gets up at 7am, but she also still has 1.5-2 hours nap in the afternoon.

Really we can't put them to bed any earlier in the week as we don't get back from work until 6.30pm and want to have a bit of time with them before they got to sleep.

I think it's only a problem if they are showing symptoms of tiredness though, every child is different.

monkeyjamtart Tue 26-Apr-11 14:13:55

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

JustAnother Tue 26-Apr-11 14:14:07

Mine is almost 8 yo. We read to him until about 8:15 and then is off to sleep.

Bramshott Tue 26-Apr-11 14:15:28

RtHonLady - I will read DD a bedtime story if she asks me at about 8pm. But if it's later than that, or I'm too busy cooking etc, I will say no. She usually has a story read by me about 3 times a week, and it's a lovely time to spend if there's time, but she seems relaxed about it if it can't happen. I think as they get older and stay up later, they have to be more respectful that it's actually adult time then, and there are jobs that need to be done and they can't always be the focus of attention.

bonkers20 Tue 26-Apr-11 14:17:27

DS(12) goes to sleep around 9pm or earlier.
DS(2) goes to sleep around 8.30pm. He has a 2hr nap in the day aswell.

I don't get the whole "they wake up at the same time in the morning regardless of what time we put them to bed". They must adjust to the 2 clock changes we have every year.

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