I'm Probably being stupid...

[RoyalWelsh]

I'm probably being really silly, but I was just reading a thread about corsets and decided to look on corsets uk. Mine and DPs sex lifehas never been fantastic, especially after I put on weight and I've never been that confident with my body anyway, so I thought maybe something like a corset would spice things up and make me feel a bit more confident?

So anyway, there I was, looking at pretty corsets when DP walks by and sees what I am looking at and accuses me of cheating! He said something along the lines of, who would you be wearing it for? All I ever see you in is your pyjamas. I tried to explain, but he wouldn't hear it and has just walked out the front door. AIBU? How can I convince him I'm not lying?

[LadyOfTheManor]

Oh dear.

I don't think you need to go overboard on "convincing me" (he doth protest too much and all that).

Just buy one put it in the wardrobe and surprise him with it in a few weeks after it's blown over.

Or show him the thread where you initially saw it and let him follow your train of thought.

It isn't unusual for a woman to be looking at under garments online though...I think Stewie's Mom is right...that indicates a huge amount of mistrust.

[LadyOfTheManor]

or "convincing him" for that matter. As I believe you. :o

[purplepidjin]

Buy one and surprise him. Lose weight and get your confidence back.

In the short term, go to bed naked. And give him a blow job. Men are remarkably simple!

[groak]

bee in bonnet on part of your dh?

if a corset feels too full on (weird this, i've just mentioned it on another thread and a mn has just ordered some!) try the kiss me dealy metal clasp suspenders, posh knickers (if any ) over top and bobs yer uncle...

has dh got a bit of an issue here too and he's just freaked out a bit?

i have to admit, dh and i were never 'amazing' and when he saw me order zuzpenders for our anniversary he nearly keeled over (his plan was to get mil to babysit while we had curry!) admittedly i had to drink a wee bit of wne before i felt i could pop it on and prance about, but... well, you get whjat you pay for ha ha!!!!

[SheWillBeLoved]

Lose weight? Give him a blow job? Buy it and surprise him in a few weeks?

Never mind losing weight, I'd be losing him.

[TulisaFan1994]

YABU - corsets are designed to attract men.

You don't need to attract men if you are married.

[MrsNoggin]

I would go more along the line of 'I won't bloody bother then. I just wanted to be beautiful for you!' Sob. Sob.

Don't forget the sobbing. It's the magic touch. If you can create enough guilt he should even buy it for you.

And FWIW, I would be amazingly pissed off if I were you really. A DP that accuses you of cheating for looking at pretty underwear online is bang out of order.

[ILoveItWhenYouCallMeBoo]

jesus christ!!

what the hell is going on in the world when a woman has to lose weight and perform sex acts on her husband when he storms off in a huff???

[lubeybooby]

I couldn't be arsed convincing a man like that to be honest. What a grumpy untrusting git!

If he won't listen to simple reason or be excited by the idea.. jeez, well I wouldn't ever put up with that is all I'm saying. I think you two need to have a big talk

[RoyalWelsh]

In his defence, he's had quite a bit to drink and I imagine he's very cold and wet outside now with nowhere really to go! I spy his keys on the table as well, so am waiting for a (hopefully contrite) knock on the door...

The blowjob thing made me laugh:) and also think as well. Perhaps if I did something out of the routine it would encourage him to enage in a bit of abnormal foreplay as well?

I have lost about three and a half stone, but still have about two and a half to go - I used to be really thin but had a bit of a trauma about five years ago and ate to make myself feel better, so have been truing to get rid.

So fingers crosses he will apologise for being such a nitwit. If not maybe I will spend the money on more pyjamas :)

[brightlightsandpromises]

i got flammed on here once for giving my DP a bj for a Mcdonalds, but this cunt has just accused his gf of being unfaithful because she was looking at some pretty underwear and someone suggests she give him a blowjob, fuck me, mnet has changed

[RoyalWelsh]

Tulisa - we aren't married yet, but I was buying it to attract Him, is that really so unreasonable?

[charliesmommy]

I would say to him "well thats your surprise spoiled now isnt it.. bollocks to you"

[CurlyhairedAssassin]

Mind boggling at the thought of "abnormal foreplay."

[FaffTastic]

Its your husband thats being stupid and BU not you. Hopefully he'll realise he's acted the twat and apologies very soon!

is he normally this jealous/suspicious?

[BitOfFun]

I agree with charliesmommy.

[bethelbeth]

Corsets are for YOU not for men. If you feel attractive in a corset then hopefully he would find that attractive that you are comfortable in yourself.

A corset is an item of clothing. I wear one a few days a week( waist training ) so it's not anything to be ashamed or embarrassed about.

In any case, you're your own woman, so if you want to look at pretty clothes online I don't see why that should be a problem with him. He is obviously very insecure.

[RoyalWelsh]

Groak, you said for the first time? Has it mad a difference in the long term? That's sort of what I'm after, we are coming to the end of a bit of a rubbish period of our lives, we are horribly poor (sob sob) and both stressed and touchy, so I'm thinking new careers, new area of the country, new house etc so maybe new sex life too. Is it really as easy as corset and suspenders?

[herethereandeverywhere]

Surely responding in kind by dumping him is merely behaving as he did (and some would argue, thereby lowering our superior female intellectual and moral standards to his, male level)?

I'd be upset but I'd speak to him about it. If there's an issue in the relationship in the sex department then everyone handles sensitive subjects differently. He was wrong to be so mean and untrusting and he should be told that - not responded to with the same ill-thought out knee-jerk reaction.

I believe we should strive to be equals in a relationship, not to compete for top-dog status.

[charliesmommy]

I can sort of see where the bloke is coming from.. only because me and my hubby had a row a long time ago, and in the middle of it, he said that I always dressed up when I went out with my mates, but never seemed to make much effort when it was just me and him.. and I can see how it would feel and most women would feel the same way if the situation were reversed.

That doesnt mean he was right to say what he did, but it was probably just out of his gob (after a few drinks) before he thought about it.

If he is the sort of bloke who always wears the same sort of Asda 3 prs for a fiver boxers and the Op saw him looking at Calvin Kleins.. the same thought would probably cross her mind.. but us women tend to dwell rather than have an outburst...

It could be that he feels you dont care enough about him to make an effort, and he loves you no matter if you have put a bit of weight on... he may think if he suggested you wore a corset you would feel as if you werent good enough for him as you are...

Its all a daft misunderstanding.. tell him the truth.. show him the threads on here... and then both of you look at the website and pick a nice corset... and get him to pay for it! ;)