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To not want sex at all after childbirth

(6 Posts)
wintersnow Sat 15-Jan-11 14:23:27

I had DD3 5 weeks ago, DH and I didn't have sex while I was pregnant. The birth was pretty traumatic compared to my last two, I didn't like my midwife, it was very long, extrememly painful and I felt pretty violated afterwards. I just cringe everytime I think of sex at all, I almost feel as though I have been abused and now I can't stand the idea of anyone touching me intimately. I do feel really sorry for DH, has anyone had similar experiences and AIBU?

TheVisitor Sat 15-Jan-11 14:25:10

I think you need to give yourself some time, lovey, and I'm sure your DH will understand. Might be worth thinking about some form of counselling to help you come to terms with your trauma.

CoffeeDodger Sat 15-Jan-11 14:28:43

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Toastiewoastie Sat 15-Jan-11 14:30:21

See your GP. Soon. This is difficult for you and if it goes on long it could affect your relationship with DH.

I sympathize with you. After ds it took a few weeks for everything to settle down down there, and then I found sex painful, even though I had really enjoyed sex during the first 7 months of pregnancy. It turned out to just be a mild infection and was sorted with one treatment quickly.

Sounds like your problem is more psychological than physical though. The sooner you get some advice and help the better.

Littlepurpleprincess Sat 15-Jan-11 14:31:23

I felt the same way, you're normal. I wasn't interested for 8 weeks after I had DS.

architien Sat 15-Jan-11 14:41:44

wintersnow I'm so sorry to hear you've had a traumatic time. Unfortunately a lot of ladies go through this without knowing that they needn't go through it alone. There is support available:
http://www.sheilakitzinger.com/BirthCrisis.htm
Take the time you need and be gentle with yourself whilst being brave with facing these feelings. This will all pass. I couldn't for months after. I'm now near 28 weeks when I thought at your stage I would never want another again. Work through it and you'll feel better for it.
Best wishes.

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