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to throw my DS's Lego in the bin?

(48 Posts)
MommyMayhem Thu 13-Jan-11 07:19:57

My DS is 5. A very bright and precocious 5, I might add. His room is a tip and although I am happy to clean and organise it for him, I do expect him to help, even just a gesture towards helping I would be happy with. His favourite thing is Lego. The thing is, it is everywhere, all over the floor in his room. He has a Lego bag to keep it all in, which you can open and lay out and play with your Lego on that. For the past few days I have been asking him to put his Lego away in the Lego bag, and then I will do everything else. I have a slipped disc in my back, which makes crawling around on the floor difficult, although I don't expect him to understand this.

Conversation this morning (and every morning for the past few days):

Me: Darling, please put your Lego away.
DS: No.
Me: If you don't put your Lego away I am going to throw it in the bin and the garbage men will take it away.
DS: Just let me do this [play/read/watch TV] and then I'll do it.

Needless to say, it doesn't get done.

I don't know what to do, please help. I want to throw his Lego away but it seems a bit mean. He really is a lovely child in so many ways, I just can't get him to help tidy his room.


weegiemum Thu 13-Jan-11 07:23:49

You're doing it the wrong way round!

No sweetheart, you put your lego away and then I will let you play/read/watch tv.

marriednotdead Thu 13-Jan-11 07:29:23

I totally understand your frustration- lego is soooo messy and a bad back is very stressful.

He needs to understand that you will follow through with your threats, otherwise they are meaningless.

Remove it all and allow him to believe it has gone (but don't throw it away).

At the point he tells you no, whatever he is doing ends immediately- you cannot let a 5 yo take control.

hopenglory Thu 13-Jan-11 07:31:12

if you've told him you're going to have to throw it away, then you need to do it

SlowComfortableShrew Thu 13-Jan-11 07:32:36

Yabu. Legislation never belongs in the bin. It is the toy of the gods.

SlowComfortableShrew Thu 13-Jan-11 07:33:22

Lego sorry, damn predictive text.

MommyMayhem Thu 13-Jan-11 07:35:36

So what should I do them SlowComfortableShrew?

Thanks all for your messages by the way.

Honeydragon Thu 13-Jan-11 07:36:32

Pack it up put it away. Explain that he is not old enough to have have it and rather than put it in the bin and waste it your going to keep it until he has demonstrated he is old enough to do as he is told and tidy his toys.

compo Thu 13-Jan-11 07:36:59

Well it's very early to start nagging about tidying
ask him after school
if you go and tidy your room you can have a comic on Saturday for example

MommyMayhem Thu 13-Jan-11 07:37:48

No, it's afternoon here Compo!

Goblinchild Thu 13-Jan-11 07:38:24

Agree, no TV until lego put away.
You also need to put another step in before the bin. I had a high shelf, sister had a cupboard. Lego time out for a day or longer.

peppapighastakenovermylife Thu 13-Jan-11 07:40:21

Yes but don't put it in the bin, ebay it wink

Marjoriew Thu 13-Jan-11 07:45:53

Throwing it in the bin is cutting off your nose to spite your face - lego is expensive.
5 is old enough to start him on responsibility for his possessions/toys.
Agree with Goblinchild- time out for Lego.

CabbagefromaBaby Thu 13-Jan-11 07:46:31


sacrilege. NEVER bin lego, it lasts for ever and you can use it for your grandchildren, plus it keeps your child busy for ages.

And it's brilliant. And expensive.

So if you're getting rid, which I think would be really mean - at least give it to someone else.

MommyMayhem Thu 13-Jan-11 07:47:43

Yeah, I thought of taking it to the Charity Shop and "giving it to the poor children", but I don't want him to grow up resenting poor children 'cos they've got all his Lego, LOL!

legspinner Thu 13-Jan-11 07:53:21

My DS's best friend (aged 9) has his Lego confiscated for up to a week if he doesn't clear it away with enough warning(this is when we get him coming over to ours more often to play grin)
No way would I throw it away either! Just have it in time out for a while...

Blatherskite Thu 13-Jan-11 07:55:41

Change the threat. Tell him if he doesn't clear up his LEGO, you will put it in a box in the loft until he demonstrates that he can keep his things tidy.

Give him until bedtime, then remove it all tomorrow if it's still out.

You can then bring it back in dribs and drabs as he earns it back.

LEGO is too expensive to bin

Goblinchild Thu 13-Jan-11 07:57:35

Problem is that you are using an all or nothing approach.
You need to have a graded series of consequences, rather than 0-60 in five seconds.
What will you do when he does something very naughty, rather than just lazy?

SlowComfortableShrew Thu 13-Jan-11 08:00:11

Confiscate it. It's ok to admit to him you were wrong to say you throw it away.

Ormirian Thu 13-Jan-11 08:01:44

Don't make it a punishment just a fact of life. When you hoover the lego will get sucked up so it's up to him if he moves it or not. I'm afraid my DC have probably lost a few tiny but vital bits and pieces because they persist on leaving it on the floor.

SoupDragon Thu 13-Jan-11 08:05:36

If mine don't tidy away, I approach their rooms with a large bin sack and a shovel. I am fairly lax about their rooms but they do reach a point where it is a hazard to go in there.

Failing that, bribery/reward. 'Tidy up your lego and you can do XXX' and no doing XXX until it is done.

"I have a slipped disc in my back, which makes crawling around on the floor difficult, although I don't expect him to understand"

He is more than old enough to understand. Especially if he is 'bright anfd prococious'. DD has understood how "mummy's bad back" stopped me doing stuff since she was 3.

Chandon Thu 13-Jan-11 08:10:45

sorry, but the problem is not the lego, it is your attitude.

What do you mean "you'll do anything else", and what about you letting him answer back to you like that?!

It's quite simple, unless you really do not like conflict. I tell my 5 year old to tidy his lego up (in a big plastic bucket) or else no pudding, or no no bedtime story, or.... (depending on time of the day)or say he cannot leave his room until he has tidied up.

Sometimes it causes tears and tantrums, but at this age they can really tidy up themselves. don't make a rod for your own back! I have a slipped disc too, so I just refuse to do it all myself. Exactly!

Good luck!

MommyMayhem Thu 13-Jan-11 08:15:19

Thanks SoupDragon and Chandon, I was worried that I was being a bit mean. Part of me thinks that he is still too young to tidy up after himself. That's rubbish, isn't it?

tyzer2001 Thu 13-Jan-11 08:18:55

Lego sells like hot cakes on ebay so binning it would be silly. But selling it would be a little harsh!

I agree with the others, take it away for a set period of time. At the end of that time, return it with the proviso that it must be tidied up after play or it will go again for longer this time. ad infinitum.

nameymacnamechanger Thu 13-Jan-11 08:21:12

He is more than capable of putting lego (and any other toys) back in their box/bag. If my DS is glued to the tv when I want him to something I turn it off. Simples. grin

Also he is old enough to understand you have a bad back.

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