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To want to smother my husband

(32 Posts)
TooManyButtons Mon 10-Jan-11 00:49:33

With a pillow. He lying next to me snoring like a pneumatic drill. Shut. The. Fuck. Up.

No amount of gentle shaking/nudging/kicking in shins is working so am considering more drastic measures. That or divorce

charliesmommy Mon 10-Jan-11 00:51:23

I find holding his nose, and covering his mouth, at the same time, has a certain effect. Followed by a "shut the fuck up and turn over" loudly in his ear as he starts to gasp for breath...

olderyetwider Mon 10-Jan-11 00:52:26

Also reason I'm not asleep. Apparently he's had flu for 6 weeks now! May resort to murder, divorce, or sarcasm

onimolap Mon 10-Jan-11 00:52:52

YANBU Divorce is really Not On.

Murderous thoughts are a natural part of a marriage.

charliesmommy Mon 10-Jan-11 00:54:31

Flu for 6 weeks ya say? Mine was telling someone last night that he had Swine Flu for 2 days last week... hmm

MardyBra Mon 10-Jan-11 00:56:39

I have two words: Spare Room

That's where DH has been kicked out to again.

If no spare room, then he needs to go on the sofa.

olderyetwider Mon 10-Jan-11 00:56:43

Tis definitely swine flu, given the noises he's making!

auntyfash Mon 10-Jan-11 01:01:47

YANBU

Spenguin Mon 10-Jan-11 01:07:52

I wish I had your balls. I opt for the loud clap with my hands, he stirs, confused, I pretend to be asleep, snigger into pillow, he turns on to his side, everyone's happy!

OnEdge Mon 10-Jan-11 01:12:51

kick him out of bed if he's snoring, its unfuckingbearable

OnEdge Mon 10-Jan-11 01:14:15

Twatflu !

midlandsmumof4 Mon 10-Jan-11 01:19:44

Nothing gentle.....A swift kick or knock (punch) in the ribs, if all else fails shove him out grin.

Triggles Mon 10-Jan-11 01:30:21

I just showed this thread to DH. He's not snoring now. I think he's afraid to go to sleep. grin

problem solved.....

ApocalypseCheeseToastie Mon 10-Jan-11 01:32:13

i'm sat in the living room putting off going to bed, i can hear it loud enough down here !

egopostulosomnus Mon 10-Jan-11 10:21:32

ooh my DH is a chronic snorer too, and claims he 'cant feel' the massive kicks, shoves etc, and its not his fault but mine that he doesnt wake! i cant shout as i often have a just settled back to sleep baby clamped onto me, i can even hear him if i make him start the night in the spare room! between him snoring and a not brilliant at night baby i get little or no sleep, i sympathise with you.

its very nice to see i am not alone, quite reassuring really.

girtlush Mon 10-Jan-11 10:25:52

ROFL at Twatflu onedge

comewhinewithme Mon 10-Jan-11 10:28:34

PMSL @ Twatflu.

OTheHugeManatee Mon 10-Jan-11 10:38:03

YANBU. My DP is a dreadful snorer. It's like having roadworks next to me in the bed.

The trouble with snoring is that it's like they're rubbing your nose in their lovely comfortable restful sleep AND keeping you awake at the same time! It's so easy to get really cross and resentful, and then it's impossible to drift off.

My solution so far is a combination of heavy-duty earplugs and poking him when it gets too bad. (Try snorestore.co.uk if you want to do the earplug thing, they have a great selection grin).

3Of1And1OfTheOther Mon 10-Jan-11 10:38:16

YANBU i think most of us have those kind of thoughts at 1 in the morning trying to get to sleep listening to snoring that is getting louder and louder by the minute...Well i did this morning anyway!

mutznutz Mon 10-Jan-11 10:46:52

charliesmommy Mon 10-Jan-11 00:51:23
I find holding his nose, and covering his mouth, at the same time, has a certain effect. Followed by a "shut the fuck up and turn over" loudly in his ear as he starts to gasp for breath

I'm rather shocked you're so close to the OP's husband to be honest..... grin

BeerTricksPotter Mon 10-Jan-11 10:55:55

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Onetoomanycornettos Mon 10-Jan-11 10:59:11

i'm assuming this is temporary...

I used ear plugs for years (no amount of repositioning/kicking worked, he snored in every position).

We moved to separate beds.

Now he has a sleep apnoea machine for his sleep apnoea machine which is marginally better than the pneumatic drill snoring, but only just.

We are still in separate beds (although bed hopping is well-known)

Takeresponsibility Mon 10-Jan-11 11:16:37

Flu for 6 weeks! More likely to be a sinus infection - he needs to get himself to the doctors and get some antibiotics.

It isn't his fault if he is snoring because of an ENT type infection, but it is his fault he hasn't gone to the doctors to sort it out.

Murder is out (for now) kick up the backside is mandatory though!

MardyBra Mon 10-Jan-11 17:46:25

"ApocalypseCheeseToastie Mon 10-Jan-11 01:32:13
i'm sat in the living room putting off going to bed, i can hear it loud enough down here !"

My sympathies.
Been there, got the T shirt. DH's snoring can be heard ALL round the house.

oldraver Mon 10-Jan-11 17:50:11

I used to pinch DH's nose to stop him snoring, he would rouse with a splutter but stop..... for a bit

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