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AIBU?

To want to either scream or physically harm ex

12 replies

toody · 09/01/2011 00:17

My ds had terrible flu type bug week before Christmas and has not been 100% since not really ill but not himself. He developed a rash over a week ago doc said either chicken pox (already had) or virul infection. We have now seen 3 different docs as the rash keeps changing latest diagnosis is he either has chicken pox, hand, foot and mouth or scabies or has all three. As a precaution we have all been advised to treat ourselves for scabies ex refuses says he hasn't got time to go to docs I explained he could just ring and they would give him prescription he has same doc as us. He again refused I said it wasn't fair that if he got it he could reinfect ds his reply "it doesn't matter you said he's not ill with it"

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xstitch · 09/01/2011 00:20

Speak to your GP and explain how you are worried about DS due to your XP's refusin to treat himself.

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mutznutz · 09/01/2011 00:23

Why would your ex want to treat himself for scabies if he's showing no signs of having it?

If he has it, he'll have a rash due to the mites burrowing under his skin....if he doesn't have it then he wont Confused

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mutznutz · 09/01/2011 00:24

Oh and by the way...a lot of GPs 'diagnose' scabies when they're at a total loss. Mine did too...it turned out I have a sun allergy.

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Spenguin · 09/01/2011 00:24

Depending on custody etc...refuse to let him have physical contact until he complies with medical opinion.

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toody · 09/01/2011 00:28

I refused to let him see ds this weekend as ds is very clingy when ill and always suffers terrible seperation anxiety when he goes to partner when he is not ill, also ex has weekend away planned so convinced him he doesn't want to be ill and miss it. I could cheerfully push ex under a bus but then i always feel like that just more so now.

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xstitch · 09/01/2011 00:30

The problem is that scabies infection can take time to show up. So someone could be infected for a while without showing symptoms. It does sound like he is going against medical opinion just for the sake of it. You could ask for a dermatology referral if it is lasting a while.

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mutznutz · 09/01/2011 00:30

Why? Cos he hasn't got a rash so clearly hasn't got scabies so he doesn't want to waste his time going to the doc and treating himself for a condition he doesn't have???

If your son does have scabies you're probably better to think how on earth he's picking up the mites.

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toody · 09/01/2011 00:30

Doc advised everyone should be treated as precaution symptoms can take up to 4 weeks to show but a person will still be infectious and it's only putting cream on.

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toody · 09/01/2011 00:33

Scabies is transferred by touch and as with a lot of illnesses it's not always possible to pinpoint where it was caught

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mutznutz · 09/01/2011 00:34

If your son has had a bug then it's more likely a reaction to that.

Unless your son lives in or is exposed to damp or dirty conditions then it's very unlikely to be scabies.

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toody · 09/01/2011 00:44

As I said the doc advised treatment as a precaution because they don't know what the rash is. Still think ex is being unreasonable but it's his comments that it wouldn't matter if he reinfected ds because he isn't ill in himself that really makes me angry why would you want to risk making your child ill if you could prevent it?

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xstitch · 09/01/2011 11:31

I just had to say that having scabies does not mean you live in dirty conditions. The incubation period can be 2-6 weeks.

toody it is that comment that would annoy me too. It does not sound like his dad doesn't agree with the diagnosis but rather doesn't care and that would make me angry.

Personally from what you have said I do have doubts that it is scabies (although obviously I haven't seen his rash). However I don't really see the problem with applying the cream when there is a chance it may help.

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