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to be a bit fed up with these holiday arrangements?

(9 Posts)
BadPoet Sat 08-Jan-11 19:19:24

We are trying to sort out a holiday with the in-laws (PIL and BIL & family). We live at opposite ends of the UK from BIL, PIL live about 2 hours drive from us. Due to distances, cost and small children it's difficult for us all to get together - it hasn't happened for more than 2 years.

Both families have school aged children so we have to go during the couple of weeks where our summer holidays overlap (England/Scotland). Originally one plan was to rent a holiday home big enough for us all somewhere in the middle, travel wise, but now it's looking more likely that my lot will do the big journey. I'm fine with this as BIL& co have done it more often (to stay with the GPs) and also they have a holiday caravan and we can rent one too nearby - think it'll be nice for my kids to see where their cousins go and it'll be familiar to them etc.

SO today, the PIL have informed us that they are already going to be staying with some friends of theirs in the same area for the week before our chosen week, and so they don't think they will want to hang around for the whole time but will stay 3 days extra, probably in a hotel.

This has annoyed me, not only because I thought they might actually WANT to spend as much time as possible with the grandchildren all together as it hardly ever happens (and actually, the whole thing was originally their idea), but also because their (already set) dates restrict us to having to book the most expensive arrival date/no of nights combination - if we went for the cheaper arriving on a Monday, staying 4 nights we would only overlap for 1/2 nights hmm. We will have to overnight on the way down and up as well.

PIL and their friends are retired. DH and I both work and it looks like we will have to use more holiday days than I thought.

AIBU or would this annoy anyone else?

pommedeterre Sat 08-Jan-11 19:21:07

Just tell them that this is inconvenient and explain why? Maybe get DH to do it. They may have forgotten all the gubbins that goes along with work/childcare etc.

elphabadefiesgravity Sat 08-Jan-11 19:22:22

YANBU. Tell them that those dates don't work for you and you will have to make other arrangements this year.

elphabadefiesgravity Sat 08-Jan-11 19:22:53

YANBU. Tell them that those dates don't work for you and you will have to make other arrangements this year.

ENormaSnob Sat 08-Jan-11 19:24:10

So say something to them.

What do bil and sil say?

BadPoet Sat 08-Jan-11 19:59:43

Think dh was a bit baffled when they first told him and hadn't quite processed the travel/cost implications - he just said that would be a shame.

We haven't spoken to bil&sil about it yet, they are lovely and I really do want to see them and the kids so I don't want to make other arrangements entirely - I suppose I feel our circs should be considered a bit more by the pil. Should have said the friends they are seeing live in the same town as them, they see them all the time - they are all holidaying together.

We will call tonight smile. I can be less than objective sometimes so just wanted the the mn judgement first, if I am confident I am not being entirely U then I will be able to discuss more calmly. Thanks smile

BuzzLightBeer Sat 08-Jan-11 20:03:54

I'd just go ahead with the original plan, change nothing, and then tell them <perfectly nicely> that you will miss them and isn't it a shame.
Their move.

compo Sat 08-Jan-11 20:07:57

Yes just make it more about a holiday with bil and his family
tbh it sounds like inlaws don't want a weeks holiday centred around kids , a lot of granparents find a whole week too much

ENormaSnob Sat 08-Jan-11 20:10:41

I think you should be commended for holidaying with the ils grin

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