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to think if you want a new qualification get on benefits!!

(165 Posts)
TheFeministParent Thu 06-Jan-11 10:00:56

WEll not really but I have just learned a cousin of mine, after leaving her partner and taking her three dcs to live in one of the roughest estates in England (another story), has just started a degree course. As a single parent of three living in a HA house she's allowed govt help to get educated...which is great, we should support people who want to educate themselves out of poverty. However I would love to do a bit of post grad study whilst my dcs are at home (in evenings) but I can't afford it, literally have nowhere to make will make me more employable following a HUGE break to have dcs.

So why can't I get help? I have as little disposable income as my cousin.

TheFeministParent Thu 06-Jan-11 10:02:02

PS the course costs £3500 for her...well the govt.

auntyfash Thu 06-Jan-11 10:03:05

Those damned single parents living on rough estates, they get all the luck! angry

NorwegianMoon Thu 06-Jan-11 10:03:28

everyone except the very wealthy are entitled to help with education-its called a student loan.

You cant get help because you earn over a set amount, yo could probebly still get a student loan if its your first degree but yol need to give up work. You need to work out whats more important for you.

bronze Thu 06-Jan-11 10:04:46

I feel for you I do. I too would love to do some study now I only have one child at home during the day but we can't afford it.
I think we just have to stop comparing ourselves, it doesn't help anybody however unfair it seems. and tbh I would prefer to be in my happy marriage in my nice area than have her life

MatureUniStudent Thu 06-Jan-11 10:05:58

Sorry, but I disagree (the name I use to post might indicate that!) Anyone that wants to educate themselves out poverty, with the hope of a job that pays tax back to the country, should be helped and applauded. And she will have to pay the £3500 course costs back, in the form of a student loan.

The fact the same access to a degree is not available for you is a different issue. I think you should be helped to do a post grad, but Parliament disagrees. And that really is the issue that we have people who work, putting back taxes into our country who cannot further themselves because funding for education is means tested and not available to all. A very shortsighted attitude to my humble mind.

TheFeministParent Thu 06-Jan-11 10:06:54

Aunty.....Ah did you forget to read my post? She had a house in Somerset, lovely lovely place and returned to one of the roughest places in the country, she doesn't need pity. She's a selfish selfish woman who took her children to live in a place with shitty outcomes. The point is that whilst I have no money to study I can't get govt help.

NM....I have a degree but it's an irrelevance to anything I would like to do.... I would like to a post grad course, but can't afford it.

usualsuspect Thu 06-Jan-11 10:07:16

Some people can't win really can they ,you would be moaning if she was on benefits and watching jezza all day I suppose ..and how dare the rough estaters try to get an education

MillyR Thu 06-Jan-11 10:07:28

I think it is a very good idea to combine bringing up young children with the period of time when you are studying in Higher Education. Most of your working hours as a student are independent study, so there is much more flexibility for fitting around childcare than there is with a job.

The Government usually helps with funding for first degrees only, not posgraduate study. There are a few exceptions, such as the PGCE.

BaroqinAroundTheChristmasTree Thu 06-Jan-11 10:07:39

You can only get the funding if you DON'T already have an undergraduate degree. So even if you went onto benefits now you wouldn't get it - as you have a degree.

I presume she's with the OU? If so - you can still get some of the degree paid for even if you're working (again with the proviso that you don't already have a degree).

usualsuspect Thu 06-Jan-11 10:08:40

If shes doing a degree I would think her kids won't have shitty outcomes ..some of us on rough estates are rather nice actually

TheFeministParent Thu 06-Jan-11 10:10:23

I too think it's brilliant to help people on benefits or out of poverty generally (although as capitalists we do need the poorshock) However it is rubbish that I can't get any help. I also have a great idea for a business and am now thinking about all of that enterprise money flying around that won't reach me either.

BaroqinAroundTheChristmasTree Thu 06-Jan-11 10:10:26

and I don't suppose she left her partner and set herself up as a single parent just for the fun of it - a nice house doesn't make a good relationship.

auntyfash Thu 06-Jan-11 10:11:24

Yep, read your post. Still can't see anything abiout her having a lovely house in Somerset, just that she left her partner. I presume she left her partner for good reasons. I may be missing something here, but how does that make her selfish?

TheFeministParent Thu 06-Jan-11 10:11:28

Usual.......You have not visited this one, it is known to be awful statistically and actually, hence the word rough and not just HA.

saffy85 Thu 06-Jan-11 10:11:58

Erm maybe living on this rough estate was still better than living with her partner? You say she left him, I'm assuming she was unhappy? And now she wants to better herself by doing this course? Howe fucking dare she!

You'd really be pissed off with me. I left my partner after a living nightmare with his family and the council rehoused me (paid my deposit on a private rented place) and HB pay part of my rent. Honestly I've seen the error of my ways and in future will stay in a fucked up miserable relationship.

usualsuspect Thu 06-Jan-11 10:12:25

Well maybe she had no choice?

TheFeministParent Thu 06-Jan-11 10:12:47

She's selfish for leaving a lovely area with great schools (where she had lived for 15 years) to move to a shithole and her dcs are now 300 miles from their father.

MillyR Thu 06-Jan-11 10:13:05

Many people do get financial help with postgraduate courses, on the basis of ability rather than income.

auntyfash Thu 06-Jan-11 10:13:33

I was selfish once, left a nice house and a not-so-nice husband and took my kids to live on a rough estate. How bad of me! I should have stayed with my violent exh shouldn't I?

auntyfash Thu 06-Jan-11 10:14:01

O ffs she must have had her reasons!

TheFeministParent Thu 06-Jan-11 10:14:36

She also begged him to take her back after her second failed relationship in two months.

Besides noone says you have to stay in an unhappy relationship, but unless the man is abusive then there's no way you should be allowed (wihtout good reason like employment) to move so far away that a relationship with a child's parent is compromised.

gordyslovesheep Thu 06-Jan-11 10:16:24

you can get loans to fund postgrads - I did I worked as well - it wasn't easy but it was worth it

I can't comment on your SIL's choices as we don't know the whole story - and with respect maybe you don't either - you sound like you have made a decision based on maybe what you have been told

no one knows what really happens in a marriage - maybe she and the kids will be happier where they are now than in the seemingly ideal marriage/home/area they where in?

Niceguy2 Thu 06-Jan-11 10:16:44

I am sympathetic to the feeling of injustice. It is a real kicker sometimes to see how much help others get and then you get nothing. I totally understand that sentiment.

But in this case I think YABU. You are comparing a postgrad to an undergrad course. It would be a bit like me saying its unfair that a disabled person gets Motability allowance for a nice new Ford car yet I can't get help for my BMW X5 which I'd like but can't afford.

And I say that knowing that I'm pretty right wing in my views on this site!

auntyfash Thu 06-Jan-11 10:17:50

Shouldn't be allowed to move so far away?!

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