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AIBU?

To having that last minute christmas wobble with regards to presents?

23 replies

MumBarTheDoorSantaUsesChimneys · 23/12/2010 09:46

I am a single parent and save hard for Christmas and Birthdays. I always get DS, now 6 the main present he wants (usually a lego/playmobile building). He doesn't due to money get the action figures, little lego models throughout the year that his friends seem to get.

I seem though at the last minute, like today, just to want to go out and buy him all these things so he has loads of presents under the tree.

AIBU? and does anyone else ever feel this way?

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hairyfairylights · 23/12/2010 09:48

You sound like a caring mum. I think the pressure on parents at Christmas is terrible ... The media lies through it's teeth and makes parents feel inadequate.

Your son will love th. Present you've bought for him,within your means.

Have a lovely Christmas.

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Ilovehotchoc · 23/12/2010 09:58

I think its very sensible and honourable to live within your means and you are setting a good example to your DS as he grows up. The media put far too much pressure on people to spend more than they can afford at this time of year in order to have 'the perfect christmas', I seethe everytime I see those adverts. I know what you mean though and I always panic on Christmas Eve that I haven't bought enough but I know its a bit materialistic of me and they don't need anymore. So stick to your guns and enjoy your Christmas.

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MumBarTheDoorSantaUsesChimneys · 23/12/2010 10:01

He loves Christmas. Xmas Grin

I have got him a DS Lite from ebay and some books and a table top football set. He also has the Knex Rollercoaster as it was the only thing he asked Santa for and so that is from Santa. Its 6 presents but I hear people saying about buying lego sets, action figures, remote control cars as well as all the books, jigsaws.

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GrendelsMum · 23/12/2010 10:41

6 presents is plenty - I'm sure he'd rather have those 6 carefully chosen presents than a set of things you rush out and buy at the last minute. My mum always used to feel guilty on Christmas Eve, rush out, buy us another round of presents, and tbh, they were never anything you'd want, and she'd be out guilt-shopping when we wanted her to be at home with us doing Christmassy things. It just got quite awkward, especially as we grew older.

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BelligerentYhoULE · 23/12/2010 10:47

You sound as if you've chosen his presents really carefully and thoughtfully and I'm sure he will be delighted with them.

One thing we tend to do to make their 'pile' look more, is to wrap up a few things that they'd be needing anyway: new socks and pants, new toothbrush etc. We also wrap up a jar of Nutella (huge treat) and some of those individual boxes of coco pops etc that I don't buy for the rest of the year.

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discobeaver · 23/12/2010 11:32

I've got the panic on as well, but am talking myself round. I hate the consumerist chaos of Christmas, it's absurd. A few things is great, esp if it's well chosen.

After seeing my kids ripping apart piles of gifts, then losing/breaking/forgetting about half of them within a couple of days, definitely only got them a few decent things and stockng fillers this year.

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NestaFiesta · 23/12/2010 11:44

YANBU. I agree with what everybody else has said. You are setting a good example and you are obviously a caring mum.

I always think if you give them 25 presents they don't even notice what's in them until the last one. Our DS1 age 4 is getting 8 presents from Toy Story stuff to a 99p sticker book. How many can they play with in one day?

I knew someone who once spent £1,000 on each of her two boys and they were the most ill mannered ungrateful boys you could wish to meet. I think you are raising a little star. Happy Christmas.

Belligerent has some good ideas too. I often buy a cookie or cake mix too and wrap that up!

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Fernie3 · 23/12/2010 11:51

That sounds like a lovely set of presents! My children have the same amount. I wish I could go out and buy hugs piles but I can't so I hope they are happy with what they get.

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MegBusset · 23/12/2010 12:30

Sounds like you have done brilliantly by your DS, and six presents is plenty! Our DC have only got about that many each although we could have bought more, I think it's ridiculous for young children to get a huge pile of presents most of which will get ignored.

Stick a satsuma or some balloons/party poppers in if you feel the need for more stocking fillers :)

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JamieLeeCurtis · 23/12/2010 12:34

Yes, I agree with the others.

I d understand the last minute wobbles. I often have this re: all the presents I get I just worry they aren't good enough. Even though I also have a puritanical side to me that thinks everyone gets too much, and can't believe what some parents spend on their children Confused

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mamatomany · 23/12/2010 12:38

I think everyone feels like this tbh no matter what you've bought.
My DD announced on santa's knee on Sunday that all she wanted was a tea set so i've rushed out and bought one but only because it was a small thing if it had been an ipad she'd have been disappointed Grin
I've put their big things from mum and dad under the tree and it's killing them to see them, i'm loving the anticipation and the build up, the best bit if you ask me.

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Caboodle · 23/12/2010 13:55

Stick to your guns, the presents sound lovely. Given the amount of rubbish toys I have had to throw away recently I completely agree that we are put under too much pressure to buy lots. DS1 (aged 5) asked the other day for an Ipod! He has been told Santa doesn't bring those until you are 12 Grin.

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SantaPawz · 23/12/2010 14:02

I'm also a single mum and have this issue every year. I normally do give in a little though.

DNs get much more presents from RP family & NRP family, so I have to resist the urge to over compensate.

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teenyweenytadpole · 23/12/2010 14:04

I agree,sounds lovely - a ds lite in itself is a fab present! (and he won't know, or care, that it's from ebay). My DD announced this morning that what she really really wants is a large giraffe. Now the sensible part of me thinks "tough" (and I've told her it's too late to add new things to her list) but there is still a part of me that would love to rush out and buy her one, and an x-box, and lots of lovely clothes, and a new dolls pram, and all the other things I know she'd love, but in reality she is getting a few presents and I know that's more than enough.

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FairhairedandFrustrated · 23/12/2010 14:28

DS piped up this morning "Oh no, I wish I had've asked Santa for the controller for the X-box"

So, me being me, text DH "Can you stop off & get a controller for the X-box please, ds forgot to put in on his list."

DH replies "You're as big a tool as he is then - the controller comes with it"

Blush

Proof, if it was ever needed, that we all want to make out little ones happy, but we shouldn't pander to their every whim Wink

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SmokinSanta · 23/12/2010 14:31

I completely understand! I actually did this last year - ran out and spent £70 I didnt have in ELC on Happyland stuff as I wanted to give them more.

This year I have stayed restrained. Just. I went and got their photos done today to give to family, and some frames out the poundshop but I am done.

I'm not buying another thing. Honest.

(someone hide my car keys and my purse please?!?!)

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JingleHell · 23/12/2010 14:35

Me too - did most of my shopping way in advance of xmas so I've got everything I intended to buy, but I'm really having to resist going out and doing some last minute splurging.

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irregularegular · 23/12/2010 14:47

Thank you - you've all just made me feel better! I was feeling guilty last night too, for having gone over the top and bought too much! But I've only bought my children five things each, plus Xmas eve PJs plus stocking fillers (but it is a proper woolly sock they really are only little things)

I feel better now if people think 6 presents isn't very many.

Funny how different people feel guilty about different things. I've never felt guilty about not giving enough presents or spending too much - always the opposite!

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mumofloads · 23/12/2010 14:48

Oh mumbar don't worry you are a fab mum and LO will love all that. Lol at the knex rollercoaster though. If it's the same one we got last year it's huge and will take most of christmas to put together. So good luck with that Xmas Grin

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MamaVoo · 23/12/2010 14:57

I've only got DS four presents because a)I don't have much money and b)I didn't see anything else that I thought he would actually play with. He gets too much from the grandparents and I don't want him to be one of these children who has, or expects, loads of presents - I'd rather he valued and played with the things he gets.

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carriedaxmaspudding · 23/12/2010 15:09

sounds like you have some excellent gifts there!
more than enough

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becaroodolf · 23/12/2010 15:18

mumbar The gifts you have got your son sound lovely...I am sure he will be thrilled on xmas morning Smile

How about a stocking? You can fill a sticking for £5 or under!! A few chocs, some bubble mix, a sticker book and some crayons???

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MumBarTheDoorSantaUsesChimneys · 23/12/2010 17:18

Thanks everyone.

I know he'll love the presents. I was lucky the DS lite was £50 inc p+p from ebay that is why he has the other things. Guess theres something to be said for starting early and spreading the cost.

I guess it feels less when you don't do the whole day out and coming home laden with bags!!

His stocking is pipe cleaners, sticky foam letters etc from Tesco - he loves making things! Grin

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